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Pro Wrestling

RAW vs. Nitro Week 5 – 10/2/95

October 1995 Background

WCW Nitro had come out and shockingly given Vince McMahon a run for his money. Still, it had to be a promising sign that the current WWF stars: Diesel, Bret, Undertaker, Shawn seemed to be drawing as well as Flair, Hogan, Luger, Savage, Sting on TV. Maybe Vince is right about all those guys (sans Sting) being washed up. Or maybe the WWF brand is really what matters.

Still, WCW had a really strong start. Vince still needed some time to build to one of his big events: Survivor Series. Could WCW put on the pressure with the Hogan vs. Giant feud? Could Vince make the October In Your House mean something?

Week 5

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RAW: 10/2/95
Grand Rapids, MI

We get a recap of last week’s RAW, where the Smokin’ Gunns regained the Tag Titles.

Now we recap the history between Razor Ramon and The 1-2-3 Kid. It’s cool to see an angle referenced back to 1993. Kid beat Ramon twice now, once in 1993 and two weeks ago thanks to Dean Douglas. I don’t understand what Vince means by “will the third time be the charm for the Kid?” Um…he’s won both times!

Razor Ramon vs. 1-2-3 Kid

Hot start. Kid and Ramon waste no time and go back and forth until Ramon catches him for a fall away slam.

Dean Douglas is out here taking notes once again. Dean Douglas was not a bad character to be honest.

Razor Ramon pins the 1-2-3 Kid. Clothesline ends it. Surprising ending. But wait, the Kid wants to keep going…and the match continues?

During the break, the Kid gets driven hard by a Ramon powerbomb after Kid came off the top. Ramond got ANOTHER pin…but the Kid wanted a SECOND rematch.

Razor Ramon pins 1-2-3 Kid. Ramon teases the Razor’s Edge, but then beats the Kid with a small package. Ramon beats the Kid three times…but he didn’t go out to injure him. Ramon and Kid shake hands…then Kid tries a small package which Razor kicks out of. Razor actually smiles, showing admiration for the Kid. This is pretty great storytelling. The Kid was the youngster who felt like he needed to earn Razor’s respect and did so without having to win. Great start to RAW.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Barry Horowitz

Horowitz was actually pretty over after his upset of Skip at Summerslam.

Pretty cool armbar takedown leading to a shot to the face with the leg by HHH.

Last week was the most watched RAW ever. The Monday Night Wars really ejected an adrenaline shot into pro wrestling that WCW would take advantage of a lot better than the WWF would.

It’s amazing how over Horowitz was. He gets several creative near falls and the fans are with him at every turn.

HHH pins Horowitz. Horowitz makes one mistake though, as an attempted backdrop becomes the Pedigree and it’s over. Good match. HHH continues his undefeated streak and Horowitz keeps doing the underdog thing.

PG-13 vs. Al Brown and Sonny Rogers

PG-13 are the USWA World Tag Team Champions. They can be described as a cross between ECW and Too Cool.

Really don’t care about a jobber match. This is the stuff the WWF needed to get rid of when facing Nitro.

Gotta give credit where it is due though. Some great double team moves from PG-13. Dropkick + Russian Legsweep combo for example.

PG-13 wins by pin. Cool twisting slam by Wolfie D on JC Ice onto Green. I wonder why the WWF didn’t keep going with PG-13. They challenged the Gunns and everything!

Bret Hart vs. Jean Pierre-Lafitte

A rematch from In Your House a couple of weeks ago.

Early on Bret slams Lafitte into the ring steps. Seems pretty extreme for WWF 1995!

Lafitte eventually takes over and Bret makes him look like a million bucks.

Jerry Lawler’s anti-Bret commentary is pretty great here as well.

Bret Hart wins by submission. Superplex and Sharpshooter. Great main event, although I believe this was the end of Lafitte. Bret confronts Lawler and beats him up afterwards before Isaac Yankem shows up and attacks Bret. That’s the last midcard feud Bret would deal with before setting sight on the WWF Title again.

Vince hypes up next week’s RAW Main Event: Diesel, Shawn Michaels and Undertaker vs. Yokozuna, Owen Hart and the British Bulldog. To say that’s a huge main event is an understatement and it shows Vince was giving it a real shot against Nitro here.

Anyway, I enjoyed this show from top to bottom, even the PG-13 stuff. These 1995 RAWs are pretty good!

TV Rating: 2.5
Grade: B+

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Nitro: 10/2/95
Denver, CO

Ric Flair with a crazy promo to kick things off. Nice. He’s coming for you Double A!

We kick it off with a match that feels like it should be on PPV, Lex Luger vs. Randy Savage with Luger’s WCW career on the line. While it feels like this is something that happened too fast, I guess this was definitely something you couldn’t miss.

Lex Luger vs. Randy Savage: If Luger loses he leaves WCW

Randy Savage wears the most ridiculous colors for his attire and it doesn’t matter one bit. Savage is so good.

The promo for the Monster Truck Match for Halloween Havoc is hilarious. Absolutely hilarious.

The match has had two spots where neither man got the advantage. It’s pretty well done. Luger eventually gets a neckbreaker on the floor and the advantage.

Ref is out and Savage hits the big elbow…and here comes The Giant!

Lex Luger wins when Randy Savage doesn’t respond to the referee in 12:30. Luger gets Savage up in the Rack and Savage is out from a Giant chokeslam, and Luger keeps his career. It’s oddly not treated as a huge deal that Luger just saved his career, but whatever. Pretty good match, a lot better than I was expecting. It went back and forth and it continues telling a great story about Luger (is he a good guy or bad?)

Disco Inferno! Eddy Guerrero interrupts Disco’s dancing (with Juvi‘s future music).

Dean Malenko vs. Eddy Guerrero

Basically ECW’s TV Title feud of 1995 here.

Malenko kips up from being pushed down, which was freakin’ awesome.

Just awesome sequences early on.

We get a side by side camera shot with the match…as Hulk Hogan shows up. Ah, the WCW tradition of ignoring the match in the ring for Hogan.

We don’t even see the match anymore. It’s all Hogan!

Back to the match, and Malenko and Guerrero are putting on a technical exhibition.

AWESOME top rope plancha from Guerrero to Malenko on the floor! He hit the aisleway!

Eddie Guerrero pins Dean Malenko in 5:41. Ending came out of nowhere where Eddie trapped Malenko on the mat, similar to Bret-Bulldog at Summerslam ’92. Shame it was so short as it was owning. Malenko says Guerrero got lucky and wants a rematch. Guerrero said any place any time.

Here comes Hogan in a neck brace. I am annoyed his stuff cut into the last match.

Generic promo where Hogan says he is going to get the Giant since he’s not out yet. Hogan decides to slap all the fans hands and is attacked by a random old woman (which Mean Gene hilariously calls). Of course, it’s Kevin Sullivan. Giant makes his way out and “breaks” Hogan’s neck. American Males and Nasty Boys run in but Giant and Zodiac Man take them out. The Dungeon of Doom shave Hogan’s mustache off. While Hogan’s promo was nothing to write home about, the attack was pretty brilliant and the Giant looks like a bad ass heel taking out everyone.

We get the Halloween Havoc promo again. Just hilarious.

Ric Flair vs. Arn Anderson

They just go at it right from the outset, knocking each other down with chops and hard shots.

A good back and forth that really showed Arn was at an elite level.

Ric Flair wins by DQ in 8:30. Flair has the Figure Four when Brian Pillman comes flying off the top to cause the DQ. Anderson and Pillman beat up Flair. Shame about the DQ. Solid match.

Apparently, we’re getting Flair vs. Arn Anderson in a cage on Nitro next week! Screw waiting for PPV!

WCW brought it this week, but I thought shortchanged two of their matches. Luger defeating Savage seemed like something that just happened, and Luger’s career hanging in the balance was an afterthought. Guerrero vs. Malenko was good but short, and overshadowed by Hogan. BUT, those matches and the main event were all solid, and the Hogan beat down was well done too. Another good Nitro. Best of all for Nitro, their rating has stabilized in the mid 2s.

TV Rating: 2.5
Grade: B+

Weekly Review

Both shows brought it this week once again. I think the WWF’s only real shot here is if the Hogan-Giant angle gets too hokey. I mean, a Monster Truck Match is pretty out there. Then again, we just had a pirate in the main event of RAW. The big victory for WCW is that Nitro is hanging tough with the WWF and even outshining them at some points (like Malenko vs. Guerrero).

A pure tie this week. Both shows brought it this week and it showed in TV Ratings. Hopefully both can keep the momentum. Hotshotting is becoming a bit of an issue, especially with career ending matches on Nitro (and a potential feud ending cage match next week).

TV Ratings Score: 2-1-1 RAW

Grade Score: 1-1-2

Pro Wrestling

RAW vs. Nitro Week 4 – 9/25/95

Week 4

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RAW: 9/25/95
Grand Rapids, MI

RAW won last week with the go home show for In Your House. This week, we’ll get the RAW that followed that show. It should be noted there was a controversial decision at the PPV that probably ticked off a lot of fans, but we’ll get there, we’ll get there.

Well, Vince is going over it anyway, so let’s explain.

The match was Diesel and Shawn Michaels against Yokozuna and Owen Hart. Diesel was the World Champ, Shawn the IC Champ, and Owen and Yoko the tag champs. All titles were on the line and the show was sold on the fact that there was a guaranteed title change.

Well, Owen didn’t show and The British Bulldog took his place. Owen though interfered in the match and Diesel ended up pinning him to win the tag belts. Now we get a segment of Jim Cornette and his lawyer (the debut of Clarence Mason!) arguing with President Gorilla Monsoon that Owen wasn’t legally in the tag match. Monsoon agreed, and Yoko and Owen kept their belts. So basically, the WWF said screw you to the fans with their “guaranteed title change” proclamation. Perhaps it was a way to drum up interest for RAW…but I mean, then you need a better segment than Vince explaining it to us. Bad start there.

Skip vs. Marty Jannetty

Vince tells us that Jannetty is returning to the WWF here. Really had no idea he was even gone at this point. I do remember a 1995 ECW run from him though.

Sadly when I think Jannetty and Candido I think of two guys who should have achieved a lot more in professional wrestling. Same goes for Sunny. This REALLY rings true for Jannetty though.

Ha, Sunny and Skip hug, but when Sunny yells at the crowd Jannetty attacks Skip. Sunny then turns to hug “Skip”, but hugs Jannetty then panics realizing what happened. THAT’S where Shawn Michaels learned that spot…he did that to Melina at Survivor Series 2006.

Dean Douglas comes out to take notes on the match. Seems like a step down.

Marty Jannetty pins Skip in 9:41. Jannetty nails the Rocker Dropper and then a top rope first drop for the win. This was a very good back and forth opener. It would be nice to say Jannetty finally cleaned up his act (he could have been a really good IC title foil for Goldust in 1996), but he got stuck in the New Rocker Tag Team and didn’t make it through 1996.

We get more information about why Owen and Yoko kept the belts…but Monsoon adds that the champs will defend the titles on RAW vs. The Gunns.

WWF World Tag Team Championship
Owen Hart and Yokozuna© vs. The Smokin’ Gunns

There’s history here. Owen and Yoko debuted as a team at Mania XI when they beat the Gunns for the tag title.

Billy Gunn takes Yoko down with a bulldog. I always thought Yoko sold a little too much later in this WWF run. It’s how you knew he was never getting back to the very top.

Owen’s neckbreaker gets semi-botched as Gunn drops too early.

Does Yoko EVER hit that elbow drop?

The Smokin’ Gunns wins the Tag Titles when Bart Gunn pinned Owen Hart in 12:13. Owen and Yoko collide, and Yoko falls in the corner. The Gunns hit the Sidewinder, and Yoko accidentally squashes Owen. Billy dropkicks Yoko out, and Bart pins Owen. Another good match! Crowd popped HUGE for the title change. If Yoko and Owen were in line for pushes, this makes a lot of sense. Problem is, that didn’t happen. Shawn and Diesel come in to celebrate with the Gunns.

Next week we have Bret Hart vs. Jean Pierre Lafitte II and a Razor Ramon vs. 1-2-3 Kid rematch as well.

Gorilla then runs down the next In Your House card. Goldust vs. Marty Jannetty. Undertaker vs. Mabel (which would change to something a lot worse), and for the WWF Title: Diesel vs. the Bulldog. Bret also gets the winner at Survivor Series. By the way, that card listing is awful.

The British Bulldog vs. The Undertaker

Interesting spot here now. The super protected Undertaker vs. the #1 Contender to the WWF Title that needs to look strong: the British Bulldog.

Great heel manager spot: Undertaker goes for the Rope Walk (feels weird calling it Old School in 1995), but Cornette shakes the ropes allowing Bulldog to armdrag Undertaker off the top.

Taker gets clotheslines over the top, but lands on his feet and choke grabs Cornette. More awesomeness here. Bulldog gets the advantage here with an attack from behind.

King Mabel is looking on! Oh boy!

Now Waylon Mercy is looking on. I actually don’t know where that one is going. Taker-Mercy feud was potentially in the works perhaps?

Taker is selling the leg injury big time. I didn’t know Taker sold stuff in 1995.

Great piledriver from the Bulldog!

The Undertaker wins by DQ in 9:20. Mabel comes in, but Taker confronts him. Bulldog nails Taker into Mabel, who plants Taker with a belly to belly suplex. Bulldog and Mabel attack, but Shawn and Diesel make the save. Owen, Yoko and the Gunns all come down. Eventually Taker makes it to his feet and shakes all the faces’ hands, which is a little weird. Anyway, Taker had this won with a chokeslam before Mabel came in, so I don’t know how strong the Bulldog really looked…but I think it’s doable overall. Match was also really good. Taker did an awesome sell job, even afterwards (which is strong enough for the Bulldog I think) and Bulldog looked really motivated here. Probably because he had a bunch of PPV main events lined up. 3/3 for RAW tonight!

Shawn dances to bring us home for some reason.

If this show had any remote historical significance, it would get a super high rating. But did anything here matter at all long term? The only major thing that comes out of this is that it does lead to Owen vs. Shawn eventually, which is the concussion angle of course.

It should be noted that despite the good show, the rating for RAW pretty much blew. I think one thing hurt this that wasn’t Nitro related: the PPV the night before. I just don’t think a bait and switch like that is going to work. Then again, maybe Nitro did something that was just blow away.

TV Rating: 1.9 (-0.8)
Grade: B+

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Nitro: 9/25/95
Florence, South Carolina

Alex Wright vs. Disco Inferno

We first saw Wright on Nitro a couple of weeks ago against Sabu.

I like how Disco Inferno had no character development for three years. He’s the same guy until he tries to join the Wolfpac.

Alex Wright almost messed up that springboard dropkick bad. It was passable though.

McMichael kills Monday Night Football on the broadcast. He says the Niners have it won. I like that RAW wasn’t the only show they took shots at.

Alex Wright pins Disco Inferno in 4:00. Wright gets a backslide out of nowhere for the win. It was a pretty good match with Disco controlling it, then it just ended abruptly. Not bad, but it could have used a proper Wright comeback if they are going with him.

WCW World Champion Hulk Hogan has a neck brace, but he’s letting us know he hasn’t missed a workout since Fall Brawl. Hogan makes the challenge for a Monster Truck Match at Halloween Havoc against The Giant. And then he challenges him to a WCW Title match as well. Hogan actually says he’s gonna bury Giant right next to his father, which seems distasteful although I’m sure he didn’t mean it that way.

SNAP INTO A SLIM JIM!

We go over what happened last week with Lex Luger and Randy Savage.

It doesn’t take long for Luger and Savage to verbally go at it again. Savage is brilliant here. Luger challenges Savage to a match on Nitro next week. Luger says he’ll leave WCW if he can’t beat Savage. Well, that’s a headliner for sure. I wonder if this segment was key in the ratings war this week.

Bischoff hypes “MACHINE VS. MACHINE”. I wonder if he really thought that was a big draw.

Sgt. Craig Pittman vs. Kurasawa

Kurasawa is hyped as the man who broke Road Warrior Hawk’s arm.

A lot of kicks from Kurasawa.

Crazy back and forth here. Each guys turn armbars into suplexes.

Kurasawa pins Pittman in 4:26. Kurasawa gets a German Suplex, but Pittman flails around and it looks pretty bad for the three count. Still a pretty good match for 4 minutes. It seems like they both just threw whatever moves they could out there and just hoped it worked out, which it did.

Arn Anderson and Flyin’ Brian Pillman interview.

Pillman with a great promo, running down Ric Flair. Double A points out that Flair’s been asking help from guys he’s turned on over the years (Savage, Sting, etc.). It’s a pretty brilliant promo.

We get a replay of the Savage-Kevin Sullivan beach fight we saw last week.

Kevin Sullivan vs. Randy Savage

The Zodiac makes his way out and posts Savage quickly.

Kevin Sullivans wins by DQ in 2:58. Savage throws Sullivan to the outside, brings the Zodiac in, beats him up, then throws the ref for the DQ[/b]. Fun little brawl for three minutes I guess, but not much to say here.

The Giant lays out Savage! Some WCW jobbers I never heard of come down and Giant kills them. Alex Wright runs down, also killed by the Giant. Lex Luger comes in…but stands over Savage. Giant attacks him and hits a chokeslam, and Sullivan takes him away angrily. GREAT segment to get the Giant over there. Giant’s falling chokeslam is awesome.

Meng runs down for his match with Luger, since Luger is still down.

Lex Luger vs. Meng

We get told Hogan will be on Nitro next week.

Nice piledriver from Meng on Luger.

Sadly after that piledriver it slows down as we get a bunch of chokes. Ah well.

Gutwrench hip breaker with the foot by Meng? Okay then.

Meng pins Lex Luger in 6:46. Meng gets the spike and knocked Luger out in his comeback for the pin. WHAT? How was that a finish that made any sense? Meng beats Luger without any help or anything. And I’m supposed to buy Luger against the Savages and Giants of the world? Huh? Match was decent if not a bit boring. A downer of a main event.

I think Nitro won this rating battle because of its segments and not its matches. Double A and Pillman were gold. Savage and Luger were good. Hogan’s promo was ridiculous but probably was “must see” since he didn’t get a “live” interview of him the week before. The wrestling wasn’t bad either, although the main event left something to be desired. Still, most of the character development hit here, especially with The Giant.

TV Rating: 2.7 (+0.8)
Grade: B+

Weekly Review

Oddly enough, RAW had the wrestling this week while Nitro had the interviews and segments. While RAW’s matches were very good, the build-up to the next In Your House was really disappointing. I mean, all we get is Gorilla Monsoon announcing the matches for the next PPV? What kind of build is that? At least we got some Taker-Mabel interaction for build, but soon we’ll see that won’t mean a thing. But good wrestling is good wrestling, and we got a title change no less.

Nitro continued its great build for Halloween Havoc. We are still missing some of the excitement we got from the first two shows, but when you have strong segments like the Double A and Pillman interview, the Luger-Savage challenge and the Giant killing everyone, I’m going to buy that.

A tie for this week seems appropriate. Nitro’s first win in the ratings column had to be very exciting for them as well. I assume again it was because of the strong promos and the Giant.

TV Ratings Score: 2-1 RAW

Grade Score: 1-1-1 Tie

September 1995 Monthly Review

Stats

9/4/95 (Nitro 2.5, RAW: N/A)
9/11/95 (RAW 2.5, Nitro 2.4)
9/18/95 (RAW 2.7, Nitro 1.9)
9/25/95 (Nitro 2.7, RAW 1.9)
Rating Average: Nitro 2.48, RAW 2.37
TV Ratings Score: 2-1 RAW

9/4/95 (Nitro A+, RAW: N/A)
9/11/95 (Nitro B+, Raw B )
9/18/95 (RAW B, Nitro C+)
9/25/95 (RAW B+, Nitro B+)
Grade Average: Nitro B+, RAW B
Grade Score: 1-1-1 Tie

The first month of the Monday Night Wars was a full on assault from WCW and I think they delivered. First they attacked when RAW wasn’t on and put on a can’t miss show. They had a major surprise with Lex Luger. They put Hogan and Luger on in the main against RAW right away. They gave away HBK vs. Sid. Attack, attack, attack from Nitro. For WCW to just debut on Monday Night and be on par and at times better than the WWF was pretty incredible. WCW only had one show early on that I thought was a miss.

It’s not like the WWF had a bad month. It was a pretty strong run of shows considering most of them were taped and still had squash matches. Vince definitely picked it up on the 9-25 show though. He was in the fight of his life.

Overall, Nitro was just better this month.

September 1995 Grade
Nitro: A
RAW: B+

Pro Wrestling

RAW vs. Nitro Week 3 – 9/18/95

Week 3

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Nitro: 9/18/95
Jefferson City, TN

It’s the night after Fall Brawl! Nitro had the better show last week so they’ll go first!

An ambulance starts the show…and inside is Kevin Sullivan and The Giant. Mean Gene tells him that this father would be disappointed. Remember, he’s the son of Andre! Kinda funny promo from the Giant. He had a solid three months in pro wrestling at the time, so we’ll have to cut him some slack.

The American Males vs. The Bluebloods

This would be Regal and Bobby Eaton. Jean-Paul was gone at this point.

Well, it wouldn’t really be them either, since Harlem Heat attacks. They offer the American Males a World Tag Team Title shot. The American Males get a free shot at the tag title just like that!

WCW World Tag Team Championship
Harlem Heat© vs. The American Males

Riggs sells the Axe Kick in seemingly slow motion. At least it wasn’t Booker’s finisher yet.

Booker’s flying side kick was always awesome. Watching Booker knowing what I know now I can’t say it’s surprising he became a big star.

Nice “WE WANT IT RAW” sign in the crowd there.

The American Males win the title in 4:40 when Marcus Bagwell pinned Booker T. Sherri Martel is about to hit Bagwell, but Col. Robert Parker comes down and Sherri falls into his arms (I totally forgot the slave owner angle of Harlem Heat. Yikes). Sherri and Parker are apparently in love. Whatever. Anyway Bagwell reverses a pump handle slam into a bodypress pin and gets the win. It’s a weak victory, but once again, something notable happens on Nitro.

SNAP INTO A SLIM JIM!

Ric Flair interview. He’s angry that Arn Anderson got a non-Horseman to help him in their feud (referring to Brian Pillman). He also calls it Johnson City, Tennessee. Based on what Mene Gene says I think that was a sexual reference.

Mr. Wonderful vs. Johnny B. Badd

I really love that music for Orndorff.
Badd was on his way out here. He’d be Marc Mero in the WWF in five months.

Mr. Wonderful pins Johnny B. Badd in 6:40. Orndorff blocks a sunset flip. The finish is botched though, as Badd’s shoulders were clearly up and the ref didn’t seem to actually count the three.

Randy Savage gets attacked by Sullivan on a beach, so Savage responds in an interview. Flair is one of those who help him. Savage says he thinks Luger is joining the Dungeon of Doom. Luger comes out to respond. He wants a match right now but Mean Gene says this isn’t the time of the place (the middle of the ring on Nitro?!).

We go back to the day of Fall Brawl for a Hulk Hogan interview. The Giant comes in on a monster truck and smashes the motorcycle Hogan was on. This would lead to the Monster Truck Match at Halloween Havoc of course. There’s a funny scene here where Hogan is slamming on the truck and Giant is just laughing.

Then a Fall Brawl recap of Giant at Fall Brawl interfering in the War Games, where he attacked Hogan.

Ric Flair vs. Flyin’ Brian Pillman

Flair actually comes off the top rope and hits Pillman with an axhandle smash on the floor. Didn’t expect that from Flair.

This match has been ALL Flair.

Flair goes for the Figure Four, but Pillman reverses into a small package, but doesn’t get the hook of the leg.

Ric Flair wins by submission in 5:24. Figure Four gets it done. Total burial of Pillman there? I mean I think he got two moves in. Flair taunts Arn afterwards.

Overall, I think this was a step back for Nitro. The first show felt like can’t miss TV. Same with the second show (with Sabu and the Hogan vs. Luger title match). Here? Nothing special really. American Males winning the tag titles is cool I guess and a moment for sure, but it doesn’t compare to watching international talents like Sabu and Jushin Liger. And Flair vs. Pillman wasn’t that good either.

Every show can’t be blow away, but there isn’t anything to take me away from RAW this week. Unless of course the RAW show blows. The rating here also indicated that this was a step back.

Oddly, they didn’t give away any RAW Results this week.

TV Rating: 1.9 (-0.5)
Grade: C+

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RAW: 9/18/95
Canton, Ohio

We get a recap of the 1-2-3 Kid vs. Razor Ramon issue from last week.

It should be pointed out that Vince keeps saying this is a special Thursday edition of RAW…but nothing else seems to indicate that. The research I did. The Network. Etc.

This is still taped from August, so no responding to Nitro yet.

1-2-3 Kid vs. Razor Ramon

Kid starts off fast. All of this would lead to the eventual Kid heel turn.

Nice flying over the top rope dropkick from the Kid!

The Kid has dominated the match-up. We also get a sleeper, which is also when they go to commercial. I’m okay with commercials during matches during a hold though.

We got a ref bump!

The 1-2-3 Kid pins Razor Ramon in 7:08. After a collision where the ref got hurt, Dean Douglas comes flying off the top onto Ramon. Kid rolls in to get the pin. The wheels of the turn were starting.

Dean Douglas interview now. Kid gets a D for dumb. Ramon gets an E. Elevate. He’s doing that in order to face Dean Douglas. A for Douglas! The PPV this weekend gets a N. No-Brainer on who will be victorious. That spells Dead. To be honest, that was a good promo.

Tatanka and Kama Mustafa vs. Savio Vega and Bob Holly

Crowd is pretty dead for this, although Vega got a solid reaction for his entrance.

Vega is your face in peril.

We don’t even see the hot tag to Holly on camera.

Kama and Tatanka win when Kama pins Holly in 5:47. Holly comes off the top with a bodypress, but Kama “rolls” through and gets the pin. Ugly finish. Match wasn’t too bad though.

Ramon interview. He’s of course responding to Douglas.

Jean Pierre LaFitte vs. Brian Walsh

Squash match for the pirate ahoy! We go over LaFitte stealing the Hitman sunglasses from fans. Yeah, that wasn’t Bret’s best feud.

We get Bret on the phone. He’s upset that Bret has gotten his jacket and stuff stolen. He’s also confused as he didn’t know pirates still existed. Poor Bret.

LaFitte pins Walsh in 3:18. Cannonball (Swanton?) for the win. I hope this is the last squash we get on RAW ever.

We get some hype about the In Your House main event of HBK and Diesel vs. Owen and Yoko. All titles on the line!

Owen Hart and Yokozuna vs. Men on a Mission

Non-title match here. This is your main event! It’s also heel vs. heel, which is strange.

Owen is playing the face in peril. Interesting. Well it can’t be anyone else in this match for sure.

Here comes Yokozuna! We get Yoko and Mabel going at it as Owen now plays the heel. I actually like both teams cheating. It’s an interesting dynamic.

Mo and Owen both go for spinning wheel kicks at the same time. Never seen that before.

Weird, now Mabel is playing the face making the big comeback.

Owen Hart and Yokozuna win when Owen pinned Mo in 9:30. Yoko kills Mo with the big legdrop, and then holds Mabel’s foot so he can’t break up the pin. Pretty good match amazingly. Owen carried the whole thing, and the heel vs. heel dynamic oddly worked.

Diesel and HBK interview about Owen and Yoko. Something about John Madden.

Cornette interview. Runs down HBK and Diesel of course. He brings up a good point that the last time Diesel and HBK were a team, they broke up.

Lawler predicts Yokozuna walks out of In Your House with the WWF Title. Vince then tells us that we are getting Undertaker vs. British Bulldog on RAW next week. Not bad.

Anyway…solid showing here. A good opener and a surprisingly good main event bookends a lot of boring stuff. The wrestling itself was also better than this week’s Nitro. Sure, nothing between Summerslam and Survivor Series really mattered, but they still had to get to Survivor Series…right?

TV Rating: 2.7
Grade: B

Weekly Review

All the talent in the world and that’s the Nitro we get? Shoulda just scrapped Badd vs. Orndorff and let Pillman and Flair go another five minutes in that case. Nitro for the first time felt like it could be a miss, unless you like monster trucks or something.

That doesn’t mean RAW was can’t miss either. But there were better matches on RAW, and solid build for a PPV no one was really talking about at all.

TV Ratings Score: 2-0 RAW

Grade Score: 1-1 Tie

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews ECW Guilty as Charged ’99

Guilty as Charged ‘99
January 10, 1999
Kissimmee, FL

There are two last hopes for ECW at this point: Taz and Rob Van Dam.

Guilty as Charged ’99 is Taz’s shot at the top title. After teasing this title match for about 18 months (back when Taz beat Douglas for the TV title in 1997) we’re finally getting the payoff.

There’s not much else to say. As I’ve written for two PPVs in a row there’s nothing special about ECW anymore. It doesn’t have the best storylines, the best angles and definitely not the best matches. The best hardcore matches are in the WWF with Stone Coldand Mankind. The best wrestling is in WCW with the Cruisers, Benoit, Malenko and Guerrero.

But that’s no excuse for ECW. All they have to do is put on consistently good shows. November to Remember was really bad and there was no reason for it. ECW has shown me two good PPVs since they began running PPVs. Otherwise it’s been mediocre to really bad. 1999 could be the year ECW comes together if Paul Heyman plays his cards right and busts out some decent shows. He definitely has the talent to do so, even if some of them are leaving (like Bam Bam Bigelow).

The Card

Paul Heyman tells us right at the outset that Masato Tanaka is not coming in as previously advertised and Jerry Lynn is still injured. I do like that he does this, but I mean people already bought the show, no?

The FBI vs. Danny Doring and Roadkill

The FBI has Big Sal and Big Guido at this point.

While the FBI matches usually aren’t good, I do get a good kick out of Tracy Smothers and Little Guido doing the FBI gimmick.

A random guy in the crowd busts out a camera and Danny Doring poses for him on cue. I’m a bit of a Doring fan and wished he and Roadkill had an ECW ’06 run.

For some reason the Chair Swingin’ Freaks, Balls Mahoney and Axl Rotten, come out mid Doring strut and this turns into a Three Way Dance.

Axl Rotten calls this match in the ring a homosexual dance party. Gay jokes were par for the course in 1999 as the crowd erupts.

Guido impales himself on the guardrail when he misses a dive. Match really picked up when Rotten and Mahoney came in.

Joey Styles says Axl Rotten is the most underrated wrestler in professional wrestling. Hyperbole Joey. Hyperbole.

Mahoney flies off the top rope into a crowd of wrestlers. Didn’t expect that there and it got a great reaction.

“You love sheep!” Quite the chant towards Roadkill there.

Doring with a front Russian Legsweep. Probably the best one I’ve seen. A hell of a lot better than Jeff Jarrett’s.

Double Fisherman’s Suplex by the FBI takes out Doring. Nice move.

Sick belly to back suplex by Mahoney on Guido! Really liking this.

The Chair Swingin’ Freaks win by double pin in 10:43. Nutcraker Suite and Aerial Skullcrusher gets the win. Really fun brawl here and a good start to the show. Axl and Mahoney take out Big Guido and Big Sal too.

Yikes, we’re still doing this Terry Funk heel deal on Tommy Dreamer. Promo is interesting at least, about a jackass kicking his dad in the nuts and the dad got revenge. Funk’s upset that Tommy picked Jake Roberts at November to Remember as his mystery partner. I don’t remember a match to conclude this though.

Super Crazy vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri

This was when Tajiri was sane, had no beard and didn’t wear the Great Muta pants.

Joey Styles points out that Crazy wrestled in the WWF before…but doesn’t mention the same for Tajiri (who wrestled there a little bit in 1997 as well).

Fast paced start that leads to a Tornado DDT from Crazy!

Tajiri works on the knees with his kicks. Great psychology here as the idea is if Crazy’s knees are out, he can’t fly around. And Joey Styles says this too. It’s nice when the announcer’s tell the story of the match.

Tajiri’s Asai Moonsault has always been awesome.

Super Crazy just shows total disregard for his body and hits a suicide somersault plancha to the outside. He follows that with a moonsault off the guardrail. Everything is crisp from both men.

Great surfboard into a dragon sleeper spot from Crazy!

Corkscrew tope from Crazy. Great high flying spots everywhere in this one.

Sky Twister Press misses from Crazy! Wow!

Tajiri wins by pin in 11:37. Dragon Suplex gets the win. Spotfests can be awesome and this was a prime example of that. Sure the psychology early on was forgotten, but who really cares here. Really fun and really good. If ECW just got some more talent they could have rivaled WCW’s Cruiserweight Division. Unfortunately we’d just get these two and Little Guido for the next few years…although Tajiri’s gimmick change would get a short main event run in the summer.

John Kronus comes out. Judge Jeff Jones comes out (the judge deal is a new gimmick) and he’s here to get revenge on Kronus. Jeff Jones was a referee that Kronus beat up. Admittedly, this is a cool payoff early on to this.

John Kronus vs. Sid Vicious

Sid is a pretty good surprise here, a hell of a lot better than Mabel two months ago.

Two seconds in and Sid chokeslams Kronus over the top rope through a table.

Sid pins Kronus in 1:31. Some chair shots and a Powerbomb wins it for Sid. Bringing in Sid as an ass kicker who chokeslams and powerbombs people would be awesome. Leave it to Heyman to book Sid better than the WWF and WCW did and would. Of course, as soon as one of the Big Two saw that Sid had something in the tank he didn’t stay in ECW much longer. He was in WCW by the summer.

By the way, ECW fans would spend all their time mocking the Sids and Hogan’s of the world, but Sid shows up in an ECW ring and he gets one of the biggest reactions in the history of the promotion. Can’t help but laugh at that one.

We see what happened at November to Remember ’98. I don’t like that they are already building up Sabu as a title contender even though we haven’t done Douglas vs. Taz yet. Apparently Taz broke Sabu’s neck as revenge for stealing the pin on Douglas at November to Remember. Then Taz let Sabu pin him to win the FTW Title, making the point that he only wants the ECW World Championship at this point.

The Dudley Boyz have made an “unscheduled” appearance. Open challenge is made. Of course, New Jack answers.

The Dudley Boyz vs. New Jack and Spike Dudley

When I was younger I enjoyed these New Jack brawls, but looking at them now this has to be the worst aged thing in the entire promotion. It’s just New Jack and Spike hitting the Dudleys with random weapons and that’s it. There’s nothing of substance in these things.

Bubba throws Spike into the crowd and Spike bodysurfs for a little bit. This is always a cool spot, although it was cooler when Bam Bam did it to Spike.

Bubba throws Spike into the crowd again. Aren’t ECW quite lucky fans never got hurt in these spots?

Joey had to throw in some dick jokes for Big Dick Dudley.

3D on the ramp is totally botched. New Jack’s whole torso landed on Bubba.

The Dudley Boyz pin Spike in 10:01. 3D for the win. A really messy brawl that was a lot less fun than the opener. Not much else to say about this…but New Jack would be attacking the Dudleys all the way through the end of the Dudleys tenure in ECW. Dudleys beat the hell out of New Jack at the end.

Joey Styles tells us we’ll get a replacement for Masato Tanaka in the upcoming ECW TV Title match. We get some RVD highlights to hype us up for that.

ECW TV Championship
Rob Van Dam© vs. Lance Storm

Storm gets some mic time first. Still a bit wooden, but not too bad at all.

Storm says he’s not the whole F’N show, just the best damn part of it. I like that line.

RVD goes for a springboard moonsault, but Storm dropkicks him off the top rope and he goes flying into the guardrail.

Unfortunately, the crowd is more interested in chanting things at Tammy Lynn Bytch.

As RVD crawls back to the ring after getting hit with a reverse DDT on the floor, he has a whole conversation with the camera/crowd. It’s perfect for the RVD character too.

Second surfboard of the night!

Referee eats a Van Daminator!

Storm hits a superkick into the chair into RVD’s face…but the ref is out afterall…

Rob Van Dam pins Lance Storm in 18:50. Great wrestling sequence ends with RVD hitting a bridging German Suplex for the win. I really like that being the finish as sometimes it’s pretty cool to see something that’s merely a good move and not a finisher end the match (you never see this today). While it was a bit sloppy, I enjoyed this for the most part. Great athleticism from both guys and I really liked how cocky RVD was in this one too.

Stairway to Hell Match
Tommy Dreamer vs. Justin Credible

I’m sorry but Nicole Bass doesn’t need to be here. What was the point? The WWF didn’t learn from this either.

Some back and forth brawling with some spots using the ladder. Nothing great but nothing bad either.

Nice flip from Justin Credible after hitting the ladder. Say what you want about Credible, but he did try.

Jazz, who I think is making her debut here, actually suplexes Dreamer.

Justin uses a ladder to dump Dreamer through a table, which I find to be a creative if not unnecessary spot.

Dreamer hits a Diamond Cutter off the middle of the ladders. While the first half of this was merely okay, this did pick up.

Justin Credible pins Tommy Dreamer in 18:45. Ok, this finish sucks and ruins the entire point of the match. Dreamer gets the Singapore Cane and hits Credible with a DDT. After he fails to tie Credible up in the ropes, he goes to hit Credible with the Cane for the big finish. Only Terry Funk shows up and nails Dreamer in the head with a garbage can. Credible hits Dreamer once with the cane then hits That’s Incredible for the win. Despite the whole point of the match being getting the cane (which is a lame weapon here even if it fits the story. At least Sandman-Sabu got barbed wire in theirs), the guy who gets it never uses it and the weapon itself is used once. While the match did pick up, I wouldn’t call it good or anything. This was merely okay and a bit long with a bullshit finish. Funk beats down Dreamer for good measure. I did not like this Terry Funk heel turn…and once again I don’t think this ever paid off with a match either.

Quick Taz promo that’s nothing new (Beat Me if you can…). Douglas has a promo too where he randomly calls out Sid and tells him its easier up north or down south to win the World Title…then botches the Immoveable object vs. irresistible force line (he says indestructible force). Not the best promo from either man.

ECW World Championship
Shane Douglas© vs. Taz

This had a real big match feel to it. This really was about 16, 17 months in the making.

Early on Taz hits a belly to belly and Douglas rolls to the outside. For some reason, the ref starts a count like he’s going to count Douglas out. I’m sure that was going to be the ECW PPV main event finish.

They fight all over the arena now, but to be fair that’s pretty boring. This whole thing has been pretty boring so far.

We get our first exciting moment where Taz hits an overhead belly to belly over a railing onto a platform. Other than that, this has been awful so far.

Taz finally gets a Taz-plex through a table in the ring. After the two count we get Sabu’s music. Sabu runs n and takes out both guys.

Sabu botches his springboard dive to the outside and turns it into a moonsault…but he only gets Taz and Douglas sells it anyway.

Sabu drives Douglas through a table!

Taz is next as Sabu drives him through a table too!

Douglas calls for the Triple Threat…even though the group had been disbanded as Bam Bam Bigelow left the company. Chris Candido and Tammy Lynn Sytch show up though and Tammy and Francine have a cat fight in the middle of this World Title match. Candido turns on Douglas as well, knocking him down with a punch.

Taz wins the title when Douglas passed out in 22:15. With Douglas calling out to Candido, Taz locks in the Taz-mission and Douglas passes out. This was absolutely terrible and an embarrassing main event. The most action packed part of the match involved Sabu. The crowd segment was boring and took up nearly half the match. We had a silly run in with Tammy and Candido. Taz didn’t even get a good win as Douglas had been beaten up by both Sabu and Candido. Absolutely terrible. Why couldn’t this just have been Taz beating the crap out of Douglas for 10 minutes? Why all the stupid stuff? The focus was barely on Taz!

The show wasn’t too bad overall, but an atrocious main event ruined that. Shane Douglas had been quite a letdown as champion in big match main events, citing back to the match with Al Snow and the six man back in November. The world title main events would get better throughout 1999 for sure.

I’ll give some credit for the solid undercard. But ECW still showed to be in a lot of trouble

Final Grade: C

Football

RDT’s 2016 NFL Divisional Round Predictions!

Well we went 2-2 last week. Cinnicinate destructed and it looks like I underestimated Green Bay (or overestimated Kirk Cousins). Still, all the road teams winning last week was a bit crazy.

Kansas City Chiefs (12-5) @ New England Patriots (12-4)

As good as the Chiefs have been I don’t see them winning this one.

If you want to talk yourself into Kansas City, you need to think the Patriots aren’t as good as they seemed (they faltered a bit down the stretch), Gronk’s injuries are serious (he was just in the hospital), the return of Julian Edelman won’t matter that much (hard to see) and Bill Belichick won’t outcoach Andy Reid (okay…). That’s a lot to hope for.

Is an offense with Alex Smith, Spencer Ware, Charcandrick West, Travis Kelce and an injured Jeremy Maclin really going to beat this Patriots team in New England? I’d be quite surprised.

Patriots 24, Chiefs 10

Green Bay Packers (11-6) @ Arizona Cardinals (13-3)

It’s easy to get back on the Green Bay Packer bandwagon after they finally clicked against Washington. The fact of the matter is the Arizona Cardinals are a lot better than the Packers. Aaron Rodgers feels like a one man show out there and let’s be clear, the Cardinals are great. Arizona scored 38 or more points six times this season. One of those was against Green Bay in Week 16 (38-8).

The Packers won’t be able to stop Arizona either. Carson Palmer, who is probably itching to win his first playoff game, had played great all season. David Johnson is great. I don’t think Randall Cobb or James Jones will be able to do much here. I expect a lot of points from Arizona here.

Cardinals 38, Packers 28

Seattle Seahawks (11-6) @ Carolina Panthers (15-1)

Toughest game of the weekend to pick for sure. Carolina beat Seattle in Week 6 in Seattle no less. I don’t think this is the same Seattle team though, and truthfully Carolina may be a little overrated.

Truth about the Panthers? They’ve only beaten four teams with winning records all season: Seattle, Green Bay, Washington and Houston. Their defense can be beaten and I think Seattle’s been the hottest team on offense recently. They really do have Beast Mode back this time around. I can’t help but think Carolina is in trouble.

Will Greg Olsen rip apart Seattle again? Maybe. Will Cam Newton pull a victory out of nowhere and show why he’s the MVP? Maybe. Am I overrating Seattle after they should have lost in Minnesota last week? Well I think the weather screwed with that. I think the two time defending NFC Champions are hitting their stride and the upset is happening. Sorry Cam.

Seahawks 24, Panthers 21 

Pittsburgh Steelers (11-6) @ Denver Broncos (12-4)

Ben Roethlisberger injured ligaments in his throwing arm. De’Angelo Williams isn’t playing. Antonio Brown is out. The Broncos have a great defense. Good luck with that Pittsburgh.

While we don’t know what Peyton Manning is going to give us, and if Pittsburgh can get some turnovers of Peyton maybe we might get one of those crazy games where the Steelers have 100 total yards but is somehow ahead 17-14. I don’t really see it. If Pittsburgh was healthy I’d actually be all for them in regards to an upset…but I don’t think so now.

Broncos 17, Steelers 9

 

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews the 1997 WWF Royal Rumble

1997 WWF Royal Rumble
January 19, 1997
San Antonio, TX

Let’s be clear, the WWF was in trouble.

While things seemed bad in the latter half of 1996 ratings wise, it only got worse when Bret Hart returned to the WWF. It wasn’t Bret’s fault as he instantly became an entertaining top guy on the show once again. The issue was ratings didn’t jump the way Vince McMahon expected them to with Bret’s return. WCW was still kicking the WWF’s ass in the ratings. Vince began changing things up at Survivor Series. Stone Cold Steve Austin looked like he had some potential after a great match with Bret at Survivor Series and was seemingly in line for a push. Also, Sycho Sid had won the WWF Title from Shawn Michaels at the same show.

Sycho Sid will always have an interesting place in pro wrestling history. On one hand he was a big star who main evented two Wrestlemanias (with Hulk Hogan and Undertaker no less) and a Starrcade. He had a monster look and sometimes had really good promo skills (and sometimes not). But the fact of the matter is he often never drew big money as a top guy. His run in the WWF in ’92 didn’t help the company. Same for his run in ’95. We just talked about how WWF was in trouble with him on top in ’96-’97. His WCW runs didn’t help either as he didn’t draw in ’93 and did nothing to help WCW in 1999 and 2000. The truth is Sid was probably a little too late for his time. Had he became a big star in the late 80s, he could have drawn huge money with Hogan. 1992 was too late.

Shawn Michaels had also been a questionable draw, although I blame how he was booked in 1996. Fans wanted the cocky, arrogant Shawn of ’94-’95. Not the good guy who had his old trainer in his corner. Shawn helped turn the company around big time in 1997 when he turned heel. It’s a shame his back went out before he could really enjoy it.

Nonetheless, this Rumble on paper could have been huge. Vince had apparently decided that the WWF could still sell out a huge stadium (which they didn’t, they had to paper it big time) with a Royal Rumble match and hometown Shawn’s return title match against Sid. Would this spark the turn around the WWF needed in 1997?

The Card

One thing I’ll always remember in 1997 are the black and white promos. A lot of those were awesome, especially Summerslam ‘97’s.

I don’t necessarily care for the “Shawn Michaels” has grown up story either. Aren’t you saying he wasn’t a man before Survivor Series then?

Intercontinental Championship
Goldust vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley©

Storyline here is that HHH made a pass at Marlena, which led to a face turn that honestly ended the peak of Goldust. Such an awesome heel became a lukewarm babyface. (Interestingly, the opposite happened with Mankind).

I totally forgot about Mr. Hughes coming back here as HHH’s butler. That didn’t last long.

Goldust just slams the steps on HHH’s back. I know the steel steps is usually a questionable object in regards to DQs…but that should be a DQ.

The psychology of the match seems to revolve around using the steel steps, which is odd.

Also what’s not working in this match is the contrast in styles. As a face Goldust is just wrestling a too slow paced of a style and it’s leading to a boring match.

We get a mid-match interview with some country singer. The heck?

HHH retains by pin in 16:50. Hughes slides in the IC Title and distracts the ref, but Marlena gets onto the apron. HHH kisses Marlena, but Goldust gets the IC belt and nails HHH. Hughes pulls HHH out of potential pin, then distracts the ref again. Goldust shoves a cigar in his eye…but then gets Pedigreed for the HHH win. Really boring 17 minutes here. Hughes wouldn’t last much longer either as Chyna would debut soon.

Ahmed Johnson vs. Faarooq

In another situation that killed the overness of someone who was hot in 1996, Ahmed Johnson got his kidney attacked by Faarooq. This was Ahmed’s comeback. Faarooq already went through a gimmick change while Ahmed was out (from Spartacus to leader of the Nation of Domination).

We get a brawl for a few minutes with Faarooq taking control and focusing on the kidney.

Faarooq flying off the top into an Ahmed Johnson powerslam was an unexpectedly good spot.

Ahmed Johnson wins by DQ in 8:48.. Ahmed gets the upper hand and the Nation runs in for the DQ. Other than the powerslam, this was pretty bad. The aftermath is pretty cool though as Ahmed Pearl River Plunges a random Nation member through a table. Still, this feud pretty much ruined Ahmed Johnson’s career. He would never get out of it, battling them all throughout 1997 (and joining once), then leaving the WWF in February ’98.

The Undertaker vs. Vader

The story here mostly revolves around Jim Cornette as he was on the verge of losing Vader as a client. Undertaker had also Tombstoned Cornette.

This is one of those matches that doesn’t make a lot of logical sense. Why would Taker and Vader go at it right before the Royal Rumble? It’s not like there’s a title on the line or anything, and they’re both in.

JR mentions Undertaker hasn’t done well at the Royal Rumble since his first one in 1993. Pretty sure he was in the 1991 and 1992 ones. He’s also only 1-2 at the Rumble in singles matches and one of those losses was by DQ.

Vader being surprised that Undertaker sat up from a few early knock downs is stupid.

Undertaker throws a Rocker Dropper out there which is pretty awesome.

Match really slows down when Vader takes control. We get some restholds.

Vader off the turnbuckles and Undertaker powerslams him mid jump! Wow! Tops the spot from the Ahmed-Faarooq match.

Undertaker sits-up from a Vader Powerbomb. Thing’s never been the same since Hogan got up from it.

Paul Bearer shows up as Undertaker chokeslams Vader.

Undertaker tries some crazy jump off the stairs onto Vader and the railing, but Bearer moves Vader.

Vader pins Undertaker in 13:19. Bearer nails Taker in the head with the urn and Vader drops the Vader Bomb for the win. Finish really seemed messy once Bearer showed up and the crowd surprisingly wasn’t really into it. Vader needed to win too after the problem with Shawn at Summerslam and never getting a big win after that. Match overall was okay, but they’d have a much better match at the Canadian Stampede six months later. Bearer leaves with Vader, and Undertaker chokeslams a referee.

The British Bulldog is going to win the Rumble because “HE’S BIZARRE!” Always makes me laugh.

Hector Garza, Perro Aguayo and Canek vs. Jerry Estrada, Heavy Metal and Fuerza Guerrera

This was done to draw tickets in San Antonio since it was so close to Mexico. I get Vince is trying to keep up with WCW here, but this wasn’t even close.

Aguayo pins Metal in 10:56. Double foot stomp and an elbow wins. Aguayo barely even hits the stomp. This was awful and the crowd didn’t care one bit (and I think pop at the end because they’re glad it’s over). Just a bunch of moves for 10 minutes and not exciting ones at that. Even Vince sounded bored.

Royal Rumble

I think the smart money was on Bret Hart here.

Finkel tell s us 60K people are in the house. Only about 40K paid though.

Crush is #1 and Ahmed Johnson is #2 to continue the Nation-Ahmed rivalry.

So the clock and music isn’t working, so the Fake Razor Ramon is #3. Ahmed gets rid of him quickly. What a horrible gimmick that was.

Faarooq comes down and Ahmed jumps over the top rope and eliminated himself. #4 is Phineas Godwinn.

Stone Cold is #5 and gets a bit of a pop. While he was getting higher up the card, he wasn’t anything resembling a favorite.

PIG gets rid of Crush…but he also gets a Stunner and Austin’s alone.

#6 is Bart Gunn. Bart botches a rocker dropper…and Austin gets rid of him quickly. Austin does some push-ups to get some heat.

Jake “The Snake” is next at #7!

Jake dominates Austin, but when he goes for the DDT Austin dumps him. Great start for Stone Cold as The British Bulldog makes his way down at #8. Bulldog kicks Austin’s ass and ends his dominance.

#9 is Pierroth from AAA. There are a few Mexican stars in this one.

The Sultan is #10. He’d run Stone Cold down nearly three years later!

#11 is Mil Mascaras. He gets a bit of a pop. He already blows a belly to belly from the Sultan. For the record I hate Mascaras after reading about him in Mick Foley’s book. You see a lot of Mascaras’ selfish tendencies in this Rumble alone.

#12 is HHH. Bulldog takes out the Sultan.

#13 is Owen Hart. He eliminates his teammate Bulldog which was the start of an angle that never really went off when the Hart Foundation came together.

#14 is Goldust and he tries to go for HHH…but Austin cuts him off.

Mascaras pulls Austin’s ears from his head…which is unique I guess.

#15 is Cibernetico, another AAA star.

#16 is Marc Mero.

Cibernetico gets eliminated off-screen by Mascaras I think. Mascaras then takes out Pierroth too. Mascaras, showing he doesn’t even need to job in the Rumble, goes to the top rope and dives onto Pierroth on the floor, eliminating himself. Can’t say I’m surprised. Fans boo too, as Mascaras was a legend somehow.

Goldust takes out HHH, revenge for earlier.

Latin Lover is #17. With one superkick he is already the best Mexican in this thing.

Owen takes out Goldust. Not surprised HHH and Goldust got short runs considering they wrestled earlier.

Faarooq is #18 and he takes out the Latin Lover. Ahmed Johnson runs in and chases Faarooq off over the top rope. Huge pop for that too!

Owen tries to get Mero out…and Austin dumps them both! Austin’s alone again as Savio Vega comes in.

Austin gets beat up…but again gets an elimination anyway as he takes out Vega! Austin is all alone again.

Double J Jesse James is #20. Austin makes quick work of him and he’s gone.

One of the greatest moments in Rumble history here: #21 is Bret Hart and the look on Austin’s face is an absolute classic. Fans have finally gotten into it and Bret and Austin go at it!

Another great moment. Jerry Lawler is #22…and he starts a sentence, gets knocked over the top rope by Bret…then finishes the sentence! Great stuff.

Fake Diesel is #23. JR still tries to put him over, although as not as badly as he tried at Survivor Series.

Terry Funk is #24 and he jumps the gun. It’s interesting to see where these four men would be by the end of the year. Funk spent most of ’97 as ECW World Champion, Bret was in WCW, Austin was just about to become the biggest star in the WWF and Diesel would be Kane.

Funk with an awful piledriver on Bret.

To add to the interesting people in the Rumble…#25 is Rocky Maivia. Of course, he would become 1b. to Austin in biggest WWF star within a couple years.

Mankind comes in at #26. Just loads of potential here with two legends Hart and Funk.

I like how Funk and Mankind go at it. This seemed like a nod to smarks looking back at it.

#27 is Flash Funk. Here’s another gimmick that just didn’t make it.

#28 is Vader. No surprise with the late number. Taker hasn’t even come out yet.

Henry Godwinn is #29.

Undertaker is #30 and the lights even go out for his entrance.

Taker levels Vader and again the crowd gets into it.

Vader fall away slams Flash over the top for a pretty great elimination.

Lawler on commentary is great. He’s nearly euphoric as Rocky nearly gets Bret Hart out.

Undertaker takes out Godwinn. That leaves Mankind, Taker, Bret, Austin, Rocky, Vader, Diesel and Terry Funk. Quite the mix of legends and future stars here.

Mankind Mandible Claws Rocky out.

Stone Cold Steve Austin wins in 50:29. Mankind gets rid of Funk and Taker boots Mankind off the apron. Funk and Mankind go at it on the outside and Bret eliminates Austin to a huge pop. Refs don’t see it…and Austin comes back in and takes out Vader and Taker. Bret takes out Diesel and Austin dumps Bret to win in what may be one of the best Royal Rumble finishes ever. Bret is irate (2nd time a top babyface attacks a referee tonight) and asks Vince what he’s going to do about it, which is a bit of a worked-shoot as Vince was still seen as the commentator here. This would fit perfectly with Bret’s rivalry with Austin and upcoming heel turn. Bret Hart was on fire in 1997 all the way through Summerslam and this was no exception.

The match itself was good but not great. The beginning was pretty slow, but Austin’s presence really made for a good Rumble. His story of not only being the guy who came in at #5 to win at the end but also the guy who’ll do anything to win was a great one. Sometimes the action around Austin was pretty slow, especially in the middle. But everything from Austin taking out Owen and Mero to the end was pretty good. I thought King of the Ring ’96 was a star making performance from Austin. This was a star confirming performance. Crowd popped too when Austin won.

WWF Championship
Sycho Sid© vs. Shawn Michaels

Sid beat Shawn for the title at Survivor Series. Of course, this is where Shawn “grew up” by tending to Jose Lothario as opposed to trying to win the title. Still don’t like that storyline.

Shawn was allegedly sick as a dog for this as well.

We start off pretty fast but it doesn’t take long for Sid to take over and slow things down with a barehug and a chinlock.

Shawn’s comeback is pretty great. Awesome bodyslam on Sid.

Sid powerbombs HBK on the outside. While it didn’t look great, it still did the job.

Jose and Pete Lothario try to attack Sid and Sid grabs both by the throat. For some reason Shawn has gotten up quickly from the powerbomb so Sid has to let go.

Ref bump and Sid gets a chokeslam. HBK is out…but there’s no count of course. Interesting spot to do there.

In a great piece of symmetry from their Survivor Series match, HBK nails Sid with a TV camera twice.

Shawn Michaels regains the title at 13:49. Superkick finishes Sid off. Decent main event that was pretty slow, but picked up at the end. The finish was brilliant. I did like their Survivor Series match better though. Randomly, Bret Hart gave Shawn a lot of credit for this match, saying he did such an awesome job against Sid and a better job than he ever could. This is the only time I really buy the Jose Lothario deal too, since this is HBK’s hometown.

The 1997 Royal Rumble PPV is a show that’s greater than the sum of its parts. None of the short-term plans went off at all. Bret was supposed to get the title shot back at the February PPV and face Shawn at Wrestlemania. Of course, Shawn would vacate the title instead with the infamous “Lost My Smile” promo. Bret would win the title for a night, then Sid would win it so he could face Undertaker at Mania and Bret could continue his feud with Austin. Shawn would come back in May and his problems with Bret led to the Montreal Screwjob.

Yet, Shawn’s victory, Austin’s rise and Bret’s hint at a heel turn (even if it wasn’t even decided yet) all were major storylines that went off well. Austin’s star confirming performance was absolutely fantastic. Also, interestingly the 1997 Royal Rumble provides a snapshot of current stars and future stars, as well as guys who really couldn’t get to the next level. It saw established guys like Bret and Undertaker. It saw future stars like Austin, Rock, HHH and Kane. It saw guys who unfortunately never could get over the hump in one way or another with Vader, Ahmed Johnson and Marc Mero. It saw legends like Terry Funk and Jake The Snake. Yeah, it’s not a great Rumble…but it definitely worked.

Now only if the undercard was any good.

Final Grade: B

Football

NFL 2016 Playoff Predictions! Wildcard Round (And A Look Back At the Season Predictions)

Let’s look back at our Season Predictions to see how we did! Actual records are in parentheses.

NFC East

Giants: 11-5 (6-10)
Cowboys: 10-6 (4-12)
Eagles 9-7 (7-9)
Redskins 6-10 (9-7)

Man was this division bad. Washington actually pulled it off at 9-7. Tony Romo got hurt and that was that for Dallas, and Tom Coughlin and Chip Kelly lost their jobs.

NFC North

Vikings: 11-5 (11-5)
Packers: 11-5 (10-6)
Lions: 8-8 (7-9)
Bears: 7-9 (6-10)

Pretty much nailed this division as I was only a game off with Green Bay, Detroit and Chicago (but we got the order correct). I knew Minnesota would be better.

NFC South

Panthers: 10-6 (15-1)
Saints: 8-8 (7-9)
Falcons: 7-9 (8-8)
Buccaneers: 4-12 (6-10)

Close with this one too, although Carolina did a lot better than 10-6. Atlanta started super hot then did as the Falcons do and faded when it mattered.

NFC West

Seahawks: 12-4 (10-6)
Rams: 6-10 (7-9)
Cardinals: 5-11 (13-3)
49ers: 4-12 (5-11)

Carson Palmer at 35 returned from his injured ACL as a MVP candidate, so I really missed there. Everything else played out normally.

AFC East

Patriots: 12-4 (12-4)
Bills: 9-7 (8-8)
Dolphins: 7-9 (6-10)
Jets: 6-10 (10-6)

Perhaps I should have had more confidence in my Jets despite that they blew a playoff opportunity at the end. Despite the good records this division feels weaker that it looks.

AFC North

Ravens: 11-5 (5-11)
Steelers: 9-7 (10-6)
Bengals: 6-10 (12-4)
Browns: 3-13 (3-13)

Really underrated the Bengals here. I thought they’d fall off after season after season of an early round playoff exit, but that didn’t happen at all. I also thought Baltimore due to good coaching would get back on track, but injuries never let them have a chance (they didn’t seem that great when healthy either).

AFC South

Colts: 12-4 (8-8)
Texans: 6-10 (9-7)
Titans: 5-11 (3-13)
Jaguars: 3-13 (5-11)

I don’t even know what happened to the Colts, but it’s clear the team needs to build around Andrew Luck (although they somehow won more games with Matt Hasselbeck. Weird season.). Houston basically did the same thing as last year but this time it won them the division.

AFC West

Chiefs: 11-5 (11-5)
Chargers: 11-5 (4-12)
Broncos: 10-6 (12-4)
Raiders: 6-10 (7-9)

I almost got the story right for this division. It did look like Denver’s QB woes and change in coaching philosophy was going to coast them the division, only they pulled it off in the very last game. I absolutely missed on the Chargers here.

For the record, Cam Newton should be the league MVP. If that wasn’t obvious.

Ok, Wildcard predictions! We went 9-2 last year so matching that would be an accomplishment!

Kansas City Chiefs (11-5) @ Houston Texans (9-7)

First, an odd note about all the Wildcard games this season. All the road teams are arguably better. How crazy is that?

Kansas City has been the hottest team in the league really, winning 10 straight games to get to the playoffs. They beat Houston Week 1 in Houston for whatever that’s worth. The KC defense should theoretically eat Brian Hoyer…or worse, if Hoyer goes down again Brandon Weeden…alive. Andy Reid’s known to make some playoff mistakes and usually his team (or the Chiefs historically for some reason) shouldn’t be trusted in the playoffs. But I mean, we’re one bad hit away from Brandon Weeden here!

The Texans’ best chance is that they shut down that 5-20 yard passing zone (which they do well, apparently) and J.J. Watt harasses Alex Smith all day. That’s possible! Too bad Kansas City probably only needs about 20 points to win this one.

Chiefs 20, Texans 6

Pittsburgh Steelers (10-6) @ Cinncinati Bengals (12-4)

So how much does Andy Dalton matter here? Even though the Steelers beat an A.J. McCarron-led Bengals team in Week 14, it wasn’t like McCarron was awful there or Ben Roethlisberger was all that great. And while McCarron hasn’t been amazing he’s been fine not taking chances and not turning the ball over. Did you know the Steelers defense thrives on takeaways? If McCarron plays safe and Jeremy Hill has a big game on the ground, it should be tough for Pittsburgh play well defensively. This is the style of attack I think we’ll see from the Bengals considering we’re getting a zero degree game.

Still, Big Ben could win this game with some big plays on his own. I think the weather conditions and whether or not Martavis Bryant wakes up will be the best chance for Pittsburgh. But I don’t think it’ll be enough. DeAngelo Williams going down left Pittsburgh with pure hopelessness on the ground and in those freezing games sometimes that matters. That, being on the road and Big Ben with only a 1:3 TD:INT ratio against the Bengals this year are all big enough factors that should hold back Pittsburgh.

Plus, it’s not like a questionable QB never beat the Steelers in the playoffs recently. I had to get a Tim Tebow reference in there somehow.

Bengals 20, Steelers 18

Seattle Seahawks (10-6) @ Minnesota Vikings (11-5)

Speaking of freezing games, this may rival the coldest playoff game in history or something close. And while I like Teddy Bridgewater more than most, I think he’s getting eaten alive here once Seattle slows down Adrian Peterson. Seattle, easily the hottest team in the league right now, is going to get beat by Bridgewater in -7 degree weather after they stack the box against Peterson (this is what Kam Chancellor’s for). Not going to happen.

And Seattle gets Beast Mode back.

Vikings one hope: the Rams always seem to beat Washington and did so in Week 16…and that’s like the poor man’s Vikings right?

Seahawks 21, Vikings 3

Green Bay Packers (10-6) @ Washington Redskins (9-7)

What the heck happened to the Green Bay Packers. Injuries to Jordy Nelson and Sam Shields just killed them on both sides of the ball down the stretch, eh. The Shields one matters here as this should be a shootout now.

Crazy stat: Kirk Cousins actually had just as good a season as Aaron Rodgers. 31 TD, 8 INT, 3,821 Yards, 6.7 YPA, 60% Completion for Rodgers this year. Cousins went for 29 TD, 11 INT, 4,166 Yards, 7.7 YPA, 70% Completion. How crazy is that. Of course, Rodgers did this will most of his main weapons down or falling apart. So both of these teams will score a lot this weekend, and I can’t believe I’m going to say this but I’m going to ride Cousins and the Redskins here. The Packers just looked bad the last two months. They lost to Detroit once, beat them a 2nd time because of some crazy Hail Mary, lost to the Bears and are coming off getting spanked by Arizona and losing the division to Minnesota in Green Bay. Sure, Washington hasn’t beaten anyone significant this year, but I really like how they played down the stretch to win their division and make the playoffs. It’s rare that I go with the momentum pick, but Green Bay just doesn’t look good.

Redskins 35, Packers 30

 

Basketball

Top 100 Greatest Basketball Players Of All-Time: The Top 10

#10. Kobe Bryant

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NBA MVP: 1x (’08)

NBA Finals MVP: 2x (’09, ’10)

NBA All-1st Team: 11x (’02, ’03, ’04, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ‘13)

NBA All-2nd Team: 2x (’00, ’01)

NBA All-3rd Team: 2x (’99, ’05)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team: 9x (’00, ’03, ’04, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ‘11)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 3x (’01, ’02, ‘12)

NBA All-Rookie 2nd Team: 1x (’97)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 4x (’02, ’07, ’09, ‘11)

NBA All-Star: 17x (’98, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ’14, ‘15)

NBA Points Leader: 4x (’03, ’06, ’07, ’08)

NBA Top 10 Points: 12x (’01, ’02, ’03, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ‘13)

NBA Top 10 Steals: 3x (’03, ’06, ‘08)

NBA Top 10 PER: 11x (’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ‘13)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 8x (’02, ’03, ’04, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ‘13)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 7x (’00, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’06, ’08, ’09)

NBA Career Points: 3rd

NBA Career Assists: 29th

NBA Career Steals: 14th

NBA Career Win Shares: 15th

Best Player on Two Champions: ’09 Lakers, ’10 Lakers

2nd Best Player on Three Champions: ’00 Lakers, ’01 Lakers, ’02 Lakers

Best Player on Two Runner-Ups: ’04 Lakers, ’08 Lakers

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 8th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 10th

I probably don’t have to argue that Kobe Bryant is a top 10 player in basketball history, but I probably do I have to defend my stance that he’s not in the top 5. So while it isn’t my intention to write a negative Kobe Bryant piece…there’s a chance it’ll come off that way.

First, let’s go over the arguments of why Bryant is in the top 10 and why he should receive some recognition for even being ranked higher.

First, he has five rings. Many will say that he was at least even with Shaq for those first three rings (which isn’t true, although it’s arguable for 2002). Of course the five rings (and two other Finals appearances) is great, but it can’t be forgotten that Bryant wasn’t even All-NBA 1st team for two of them.

The 81 point game. It’s obviously quite impressive. He arguably could have done this twice too with his 62 point game no one remembers against Dallas (a much tougher opponent than the terrible Raptors team he scored the 81 against) where he only played 32 minutes, sitting out the entire 4th. Of course, when you were allowed to shoot as much as Kobe could in 2006 (2 assists in the 81 point game, 0 in the 62 point game) an explosion like that was definitely on the table.

He took Smush Parker to the playoffs! Yes, the ’06 and ’07 Lakers were pretty awful and Kobe getting them to the playoffs is a hell of an achievement. We’ll get to that.

Ok, so why isn’t Kobe higher than 10?

He arguably was never the best player in the league for one. He wasn’t even the correct choice for MVP when he won it in 2008 (Chris Paul was). You can argue that he correctly was never the MVP of the league (although, I think I’d give it to him in 2006). Every other player on this list, with perhaps the exception of one, clearly was the best player in the league at one point. Amazingly, for a big time scorer, Bryant was never super efficient, failing to crack 47% shooting for a season even once in his career. His advanced metrics are slightly disappointing.

Secondly, Kobe Bryant was given everything to succeed. He began his career with arguably the greatest low post presence in NBA history. After that he got Phil Jackson as his Head Coach. After pissing off both Shaq and Jackson (read Jackson’s book “The Last Season”. It’s shocking Kobe and Phil got back together after that), he went through a tough season and got Jackson back. When he couldn’t get out of Round 1, he was gifted not only a budding Andrew Bynum, but Pau Gasol for basically free. Has another other big name superstar received so much help in his career? It should be pointed out that without elite help, Kobe could never get past Round 1. He had a chance to in 2006 against the Suns up 3-1. The Lakers lost 4-3.

Twice early on when everyone thought Kobe and Shaq were equals, Kobe had a chance to lead the Lakers but failed. The first time was in the 2002 season, where Kobe led Laker teams were 5-8 while Shaq was out. The 2nd time was the 2004-2005 season. Despite hand checking being outlawed and the league moving to a perimeter based game, Kobe suffered without Shaq and Jackson, and failed to enter the group of players that guaranteed you a playoff berth when healthy and in their peak.

Lastly, Kobe Bryant’s “clutchness” is slightly overblown. He actually didn’t have a great shooting percentage late in 4th quarters and absolutely bombed and was saved in the biggest game of his career (Game 7 vs. the Celtics in 2010, Bryant shot 6 for 24, but the Lakers came back with Kobe on the bench). I would probably say he was very good, but not great, when it mattered.

Kobe will historically never be treated fairly. Everyone wanted him to be the next Michael Jordan and while he clearly never was that…he still was great overall and his accomplishments can’t be denied.

#9. Hakeem Olajuwon

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NBA MVP: 1x (’94)

NBA Finals MVP: 2x (’94, ‘95)

NBA All-1st Team: 6x (’87, ’88, ’89, ’93, ’94, ‘97)

NBA All-2nd Team: 3x (’86, ’90, ‘96)

NBA All-3rd Team: 2x (’95, ‘99)

NBA Defensive Player of the Year: 2x (’93, ’94)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team: 5x (’87, ’88, ’90, ’93, ‘94)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 4x (’85, ’91, ’96, ‘97)

NBA All-Rookie 1st Team: 1x (’85)

NBA All-Star: 12x (’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97)

NBA Rebounds Leader: 2x (’89, ‘90)

NBA Blocks Leader: 2x (’90, ’93)

NBA Defensive Rating Leader: 5x (’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91)

NBA Top 10 Points: 8x (’88, ’89, ’90, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ‘97)

NBA Top 10 Rebounds: 10x (’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94)

NBA Top 10 Steals: 2x (’89, ’90)

NBA Top 10 Blocks: 14x (’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ‘99)

NBA Top 10 PER: 13x (’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ‘99)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 5x (’87, ’88, ’89, ’93, ‘94)

NBA Top 10 Defensive Win Shares: 13x (’85, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’99)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 5x (’86, ’87, ’89, ’93, ‘94)

NBA Career Points: 10th

NBA Career Blocks: 1st

NBA Career Steals: 8th

NBA Career Rebounds: 13th

NBA Career Win Shares: 15th

NBA Career Defensive Win Shares: 4th

NBA Career Win Shares: 18th

NBA Career WS/48: 44th

Best Player on Two Champions: ’94 Rockets, ’95 Rockets

Best Player on One Runner-Up: ’86 Rockets

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 11th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 13th

Hakeem Olajuwon gets the nod over Kobe for one big reason: there’s a two year stretch where without a shadow of a doubt Hakeem was the best player in the league. After having a huge 1993 and bringing the Rockets back to relevancy, Hakeem followed up with a great 1994 and filled the void left by the retirement of Michael Jordan. Hakeem had a 27-13-4-4 season, leading the Rockets to 58 wins despite not having a real 2nd guy (Kenny Smith? Otis Thorpe?). The Rockets ripped through the playoffs, only going the distance against Charles Barkley’s Suns in seven games. In the Finals against a superior Knicks team, Olajuwon owned Patrick Ewing and the Rockets came back down 3-2. Hakeem in Game 6? A 30-10-4. In Game 7? A 25-10-7-3. While the Rockets struggled record wise in 1995, Hakeem again led them throughout the playoffs. After getting through Malone’s Jazz and Barkley’s Suns, Hakeem went against 1995 MVP David Robinson and showed him who the real MVP was. Go on youtube and see for yourself, the video is titled Hakeem dominates Robinson. Hakeem would go on to average a 33-12-6 in the Finals against Shaquille O’Neal, and Shaq has gone on record about just how great Hakeem was.

If that doesn’t convince you, Hakeem was always great anyway. He came into the league and immediately led the Rockets to the playoffs. In his 2nd year he was good enough to lead the Rockets to the Finals with Ralph Sampson and came within two games of upsetting the 1986 Celtics. The Rockets around him imploded basically making Hakeem an earlier version of Kevin Garnett, leading bad teams to the playoffs every year. The best example of Hakeem’s no help? In the 1988 Playoffs, Hakeem averaged 38-17-2-3 including a 41-26 game, yet the Rockets still lost in four. Maybe that shouldn’t have surprised anyone since the season before in Game 6 against Seattle he put up a 49-25 in a losing effort.

Hakeem is the greatest defensive center of the modern era. He beat all of his rivals (Ewing, Robinson and Shaq) in big moments in a two year span and left no question about who the best player in the NBA was when Jordan was gone. And speaking of Jordan, well, one city that doesn’t seem to care that they drafted someone else ahead of Jordan is Houston. That’s how great Hakeem is.

#8. Shaquille O’Neal

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NBA MVP: 1x (’00)

NBA Finals MVP: 3x (’00, ’01, ‘02)

NBA All-1st Team: 8x (’98, ’00, 01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ‘06)

NBA All-2nd Team: 1x (‘95)

NBA All-3rd Team: 4x (’94, ’96, ’97, ‘09)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 3x (’00, ’01, ‘03)

NBA Rookie of the Year: 1x (’93)

NBA Rookie All-1st Team: 1x (’93)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 3x (’00, ’04, ’09)

NBA All-Star: 15x (’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ‘09)

NBA Points Leader: 3x (’95, ’99, ’00)

NBA FG% Leader: 10x (’94, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’09)

NBA PER Leader: 5x (’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 2x (’00, ’01)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 2x (’00, ’02)

NBA Defensive Rating Leader: 1x (‘00)

NBA Top 10 Points: 9x (’93, ’94, ’95, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ‘03)

NBA Top 10 Rebounds: 8x (’93, ’94, ’95, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’03, ‘05)

NBA Top 10 Blocks: 8x (’93, ’94, ’95, ’00, ’01, ’03, ’04, ‘05)

NBA Top 10 PER: 14x (’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ‘06)

NBA Top 6 Win Shares: 7x (’94, ’95, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03)

NBA Top 6 WS/48: 8x (’94, ’95, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’05)

NBA Career Points: 7th

NBA Career Blocks: 8th

NBA Career Rebounds: 14th

NBA Career Win Shares: 15th

NBA Career Defensive Win Shares: 4th

NBA Career Win Shares: 11th

NBA Career WS/48: 15th

Best Player on Three Champions: ’00 Lakers, ’01 Lakers, ’02 Lakers

2nd Best Player on One Champion: ’06 Heat

Best Player on One Runner-up: ’95 Magic

2nd Best Player on One Runner-up: ’04 Lakers

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 12th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 4th

Shaquille O’Neal could have been #1 on this list. There are two trains of thought of why he never reached those heights. The first is that he never really took basketball as seriously as he could have except for 2000. For a while I agreed with this, reading stories about Shaq not being in shape and several players over the years complaining about that. But once I read Shaq’s book and he wrote about how his body needed to recover more than others due to the pounding he took, I changed the course on my opinion about Shaq’s effort. His body was unique and in a lot of ways its incredible he didn’t break down like Yao or others that were bigger than the standard (well he did at the end). So I tend to agree with the 2nd course, that if Shaq went all out his body would have fallen apart, and he maximized the strengths his body gave him.

And maximized he did. Shaq dominated the NBA for most of his career and especially in the early 2000s. He was taken for granted, with fans complaining he was only good because of his power and not talent (which was ridiculous). Didn’t matter to Shaq. Once Phil Jackson came into play Shaq was able to channel his focus and energy and basically kicked the NBA’s ass; absolutely dominating in 2000. He probably should have been the 2001 MVP as well (and 2005) and destroyed Dikembe Mutombo in the 2001 Finals.

The Lakers would eventually choose Kobe over Shaq, and Shaq made them pay by winning a title in 2006 (and possibly would have in 2005 had Wade not went down in the Conference Finals). Shaq still had some solid years left at the end of his career too, playing decently in 2009 and becoming a great role player in 2011.

While Tim Duncan held the “best player alive” title for perhaps one season in 1999 post-MJ, Shaq owned it through 2002. During those early 2000s years no could go toe to toe with Shaq. Not Mutombo, not Duncan, not anyone.

#7. Larry Bird

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NBA MVP: 3x (’84, ’85, ‘86)

NBA Finals MVP: 2x (’84, ‘86)

NBA All-1st Team: 9x (’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ‘88)

NBA All-2nd Team: 1x (‘90)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 3x (’82, ’83, ‘84)

NBA Rookie of the Year: 1x (’80)

NBA Rookie All-1st Team: 1x (’80)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 1x (‘82)

NBA All-Star: 12x (’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’90, ’91, ‘92)

NBA FT% Leader: 4x (’84, ’86, ’87, ’90)

NBA PER Leader: 2x (’85, ‘86)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 2x (’85, ‘86)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 2x (’85, ‘86)

NBA Defensive Win Share Leader: 4x (’80, ’81, ’84, ’86)

NBA Top 10 Points: 6x (’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ‘88)

NBA Top 10 Rebounds: 7x (’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ‘85)

NBA Top 10 Steals: 3x (’81, ’84, ‘86)

NBA Top 10 PER: 7x (’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 9x (’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ‘88)

NBA Top 6 WS/48: 7x (’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ‘88)

NBA Career Points: 31st

NBA Career Rebounds: 50th

NBA Career Win Shares: 23rd

NBA Career WS/48: 20th

Best Player on Three Champions: ’81 Celtics, ’84 Celtics, ’86 Celtics

Best Player on Two Runner-ups: ’85 Celtics, ’87 Celtics

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 5th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 9th

The moment Larry Legend stepped onto the court he was the best player in the NBA. Boston, during a rare slump, had missed the playoffs two straight seasons and came off a 29-53 year. Bird showed up, and here are your win totals for his first nine seasons: 61, 62, 63, 56, 62, 63, 67, 59 and 57. With Magic, he’s credited with saving the NBA. And how did he do it? Be being great. By being a winner and creating and being a big reason each and every NBA season was compelling. He had a competitive streak that only guys like Jordan and Russell matched. For the stat counters he’s arguably the reason Fantasy Basketball was created (PTS+AST+REB, the Larry Bird League).

We also loved how Bird played. At times he would run around to the opposing team’s bench just to hit a three pointer in their face. He once asked an opposing crowd to get louder when shooting a free throw. He walked into the inaugural three point contest and asked “who’s coming in second?” then of course, won the contest. He led teams that ripped through the two best young players in the league in Jordan and Olajuwon.  If it weren’t for Magic and the Lakers, the Celtics might have just won four straight titles.

As for dominance, look at his 1985 season: 28.7 PPG, 10.5 RPG, 6.6 APG, 1.6 SPG, 52-43-88%s. And it wasn’t like the other seasons were much worse. Even after his back betrayed him, he had a great 1990 and put up solid efforts in 1991 and 1992.

He’s 7th only because of that. If Bird had started earlier or had been able to extend his career, perhaps he could be in the Top 5, but the six players ahead of him were just so dominant at certain points I just can’t put Bird ahead.

#6. LeBron James

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NBA MVP: 4x (’09, ’10, ’12, ‘13)

NBA Finals MVP: 2x (’12, ‘13)

NBA All-1st Team: 9x (’06, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ’14, ’15)

NBA All-2nd Team: 2x (’05, ‘07)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team: 5x (’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 1x (’14)

NBA Rookie of the Year: 1x (’04)

NBA Rookie All-1st Team: 1x (’04)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 2x (’06, ‘08)

NBA All-Star: 11x (’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ’14, ‘15)

NBA PER Leader: 6x (’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 5x (’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 5x (’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13)

NBA Top 10 Points: 12x (’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ’14)

NBA Top 10 Assists: 7x (’05, ’06, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’13, ‘14)

NBA Top 10 Steals: 5x (’05, ’08, ’09, ’11, ‘12)

NBA Top 10 PER: 11x (’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ’14, ’15)

NBA Top 4 Win Shares: 10x (’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ‘14)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 10x (’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ‘14)

NBA Career Points: 17th

NBA Career Assists: 22nd

NBA Career Steals: 30th

NBA Career Win Shares: 10th

NBA Career WS/48: 6th

Best Player on Two Champions: ’12 Heat, ’13 Heat

Best Player on Four Runner-ups: ’07 Cavs, ’11 Heat, ’14 Heat, ’15 Cavs

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 20th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 31st

Like Wilt, LeBron gets criticized for the times he falls short way more than he should be, and his successes aren’t given enough credit. Let’s look at those criticisms and tear (most of) them apart.

He’s 2-4 in the NBA Finals.

Only one of these losses go against LeBron, which is the 2011 Finals where he failed to assert himself in a very winnable series. Other than that, you can’t really blame him. He ripped apart the ’07 Pistons and that Cavs team (absolutely awful without LeBron) stood no chance against the ’07 Spurs. In 2014 the Heat weren’t as strong as the year before as they battled injures (especially to Dwyane Wade) and Kwahi Leonard stepped up and became a superstar. Remember, people thought the 2013 Spurs were the best team in NBA history to not win the NBA title. In 2015 the Warriors from top to bottom were so much better than the Cavs it might have been the biggest mismatch in NBA history once Kyrie Irving went down. LeBron still got it to six games. Has anyone gotten to the Finals with less talent than LeBron on his team?

He’s not clutch.

Yeah, he is. Once again everyone like to point out the failures (like him missing the potential game winning shot in Game 6 of the 2013 Finals) and totally ignore the successes (the 48 Special against Detroit in 2007, the shot vs. Orlando in 2009 and the shot against Chicago in 2015). He has a high FG% late in games, much higher than someone like Kobe.

He gave up on Cleveland.

This was admittedly pretty bad. The 2010 Eastern Conference Semi-Finals was quite embarrassing for LeBron, and we still don’t know what was going on there. But it’s not as if other great players didn’t let their teams down late either. The only ones who escape this really are Jordan, Russell, Duncan and Bird.

The East has been weak throughout LeBron’s career.

It was in Jordan’s too. And it wasn’t like they were all bad teams. Those early Wizards teams had talent (Gilbert, Butler and Jamison), Detroit had won a NBA title and nearly won a 2nd one, and Chicago was no slouch in 2011 or 2015. Plus he averaged a triple double against the 60 win Hawks last year.

So let’s look at the positives.

He has some of the most clutch games ever.

He has the highest Game 7 scoring average in NBA history. His Game 5 against Detroit in the Conference Finals (the 48 special) gave him no ceiling whatsoever as a player (48-9-7, scored 25 of the last 26 Cleveland points). In perhaps the most important game of his career (up to that point), down 3-2 in the Eastern Conference Finals to Boston with no titles yet to his name, in Boston, he went for a 45-15 on 19/26 shooting, ending Boston’s last shot at a title. He clinched the title with a 26-13. He followed that up in the 2013 NBA Finals, once again down 3-2, with two spectacular games: a 32-10-11 and a 37-12 in the clincher. And in losing, he averaged a 36-13-9 in the 2015 NBA Finals (admittedly did shoot poorly).

He has some of the best Advanced Metrics ever.

In the modern era, he has the best WS/48 season ever (better than Jordan) and four of the top 11 overall. He’s already 10th on the career win shares list. He had a staggering .399 WS/48 in the ’09 playoffs.

He was undoubtedly the best player in the NBA for six straight years.

Sorry Kobe fans, but give LeBron Pau Gasol in ’09 or ’10 and he’s winning the title too. ’11 Derrick Rose won the MVP and got owned by LeBron in the Conference Finals. ’12 and ’13 are obvious. ’14 Durant might have won the MVP, but it was unclear how effective he was without Westbrook.

LeBron still has a shot at the top 3 (even #1, unlikely as that is). I expect Cleveland to be in the Finals again in ’16 too.

#5. Tim Duncan

top100duncan

Resume

NBA MVP: 2x (’02, ‘03)

NBA Finals MVP: 3x (’99, ’03, ‘05)

NBA All-1st Team: 10x (’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’07, ‘13)

NBA All-2nd Team: 3x (’06, ’08, ‘09)

NBA All-3rd Team: 1x (’15)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team: 8x (’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’05, ’07, ‘08)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 7x (’98, ’04, ’06, ’09, ’10, ’13, ‘15)

NBA Rookie of the Year: 1x (’98)

NBA Rookie All-1st Team: 1x (’98)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 1x (‘00)

NBA All-Star: 15x (’98, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ‘15)

NBA Rebounds Leader: 1x (’02)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 2x (’02, ’03)

NBA Defensive Rating Leader: 4x (’05, ’06, ’07, ’13)

NBA Offensive Win Shares Leader: 1x (’02)

NBA Defensive Win Shares Leader: 5x (’98, ’99, ’01, ’06, ’07)

NBA Top 10 Points: 4x (’98, ’99, ’02, ’03)

NBA Top 8 Rebounds: 12x (’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10)

NBA Top 10 Blocks: 15x (’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’11, ’13, ’14, ‘15)

NBA Top 10 PER: 13x (’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ‘13)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 9x (’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03 ,’04, ’07, ‘10)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 13x (’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ‘15)

NBA Career Points: 14th

NBA Career Rebounds: 7th

NBA Career Blocks: 5th

NBA Career Win Shares: 6th

NBA Career WS/48: 13th

Career Defensive Rating: 2nd

Best Player on Five Champions: ’99 Spurs, ’03 Spurs, ’05 Spurs, ’07 Spurs, ’14 Spurs

Best Player on One Runner-up: ’13 Spurs

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 7th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 8th

Without a doubt the most consistent superstar ever. I don’t think I have to defend Duncan’s high ranking, but I probably have to defend putting him above Kobe Bryant. The fact of the matter is Duncan got two advantages in his career, and one didn’t really pan out until 2005ish. He was lucky to end up in a great system with Gregg Popovich and Tony Parker and Manu Ginobili very good 2nd and 3rd options (but not great). Unlike Kobe, Duncan came into the league and was immediately great (NBA All-1st Team his Rookie Year!), and in year 2 he became the face of the Spurs over David Robinson.  He temporarily grabbed the “Best Player Alive” Championship in only his 2nd year, winning the 1999 Championship and holding off Shaq. Even in Shaq’s three year era of dominance, Duncan (rightfully) took a MVP and took back the Best Player Alive title. His dominant 2003 season is one of the best ever in regards to carrying a team. He wins MVP, gets San Antonio by the Lakers with little help (roster that year, a 19 year old Parker, Stephen Jackson, Bruce Bowen, a washed up Robinson and Manu, who was still a low minute bench guy).

Still, he spanked the Lakers in the 2nd Round (games of 28-7-8, 28-11, 36-9, 27-14 and 37-16 in the clincher in LA no less). With the Spurs falling apart around him, he carried them in the 2003 NBA Finals with one of the best Finals performances ever (the Spurs had used Speedy Claxton at some points because Parker wasn’t playing well…Speedy Claxton!) Here’s Duncan’s 2003 NBA Finals: A 32-20-6-7Blk in Game 1, a 21-16-7 in Game 3, a 23-17-7Blk in Game 4, a 29-17 in Game 5 and a 21-20-10-8blk in the clincher (that’s right, a near quadruple double no one talks about today for some reason).

He hit a clutch shot right before Fisher’s miracle .4 seconds shot that no one remembers because of Fisher. He won the ’05 title, dealing with Ben and Rasheed Wallace in the Finals. In 2007 with the league changing to favor offense, Duncan’s defense shut down any teams that had a slasher (like LeBron in the ’07 Finals). Continually was one of the best players in the league through 2015, saving himself for the playoffs and taking less money to let the Spurs build their roster (he averaged a 15-10 with 58% shooting in the ’14 Finals win). Even in a loss, he played great in his last playoff series as well, averaging a 18-11 in the Round 1 exit last year against the Clippers (who had DeAndre Jordan and Blake Griffin in the middle). That included a 27-11 in the Game 7 loss. In Duncan’s entire run in the NBA, he never played for a team that won less than 50 games (’99 lockout season they won 37, but the winning % was higher than a 50 win season).

Today Duncan’s taken a smaller role than ever, but I wouldn’t rule him out for having a big playoffs. It may be Leonard’s team now, but I think everyone knows who the top guy is in the Spurs locker room.

#4. Magic Johnson

ORLANDO- FEBRUARY 9: Magic Johnson #32 of the Western Conference All-Stars holds the MVP trophy following the 1992 NBA All Star Game on February 9, 1992 at the Orlando Arena in Orlando, Florida. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 1987 NBAE (Photo by Andrew D. Bernstein/NBAE via Getty Images)

Resume

NBA MVP: 3x (’87, ’89, ‘90)

NBA Finals MVP: 3x (’80, ’82, ’87)

NBA All-1st Team: 9x (’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ‘91)

NBA All-2nd Team: 1x (‘82)

NBA Rookie All-1st Team: 1x (’80)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 2x (’90, ‘92)

NBA All-Star: 12x (’80, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ‘92)

NBA Assists Leader: 3x (’83, ’86, ‘87)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 1x (‘87)

NBA Top 10 Points: 1x (‘87)

NBA Top 10 Assists: 11x (’80, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ‘91)

NBA Top 10 Steals: 4x (’80, ’82, ’83, ‘84)

NBA Top 10 PER: 10x (’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ‘91)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 10x (’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ‘91)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 10x (’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ‘91)

NBA Top 10 Offensive Rating: 8x (’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’89, ’90, ’91)

NBA Career Assists: 5th

NBA Career Steals: 19th

NBA Career Win Shares: 20th

NBA Career WS/48: 8th

Career Defensive Rating: 3rd

Best Player on Two Champions: ’87 Lakers, ’88 Lakers

2nd Best Player on Three Champions: ’80 Lakers, ’82 Lakers, ’85 Lakers

Best Player on Two Runner-ups: ’89 Lakers, ’91 Lakers

2nd Best Player on Two Runner-Ups: ’83 Lakers, ’84 Lakers

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 4th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 6th

Took the “Best Player Alive” title from Bird in 1987, only to kind of co-hold it with Jordan for the next few years until he retired. He gets the edge on Bird because he was able to peak when Bird unfortunately fell apart.

Magic was also great right away. While he didn’t make All-NBA teams right away, his performance in the 1980 Finals made him a legend as a rookie. With Kareem being out, Magic played center and had a 42-15-7. Then, we almost lost him, as Magic almost became one of those young guys given way too much too soon. Of course, LA thought it was a good idea for Magic to share point guard duties with Norm Nixon for some reason. Magic rebounded in ’82 with a near season average of a triple double. Magic would peak after Nixon was traded, but still in the 1984 Finals he had one of the most unclutch performances by a top guy in NBA history (threw ball away on a potential game winning play in Game 2, missed two clutch free throws in Game 4 and had two late turnovers to cost LA in Game 7). Still, Magic helped win the ’85 title, then took over for an aging Kareem as the alpha dog on the Lakers. After Hakeem and Sampson roughed up Kareem in 1986, Magic became the best player in the league, leading the Lakers to four more Finals appearances in the next five years, despite Kareem falling apart and retiring. In that five year span: Two Rings, Two MVPs, Four Finals appearances. We also have no idea if LA could have come back in ’89 as Magic got injured in the series.

It should be noted that when Magic joined the Lakers, LA had the following win totals: 60, 54, 57, 58, 54, 62, 62, 65, 62, 57, 63 and 58. He made the Finals nine times in 13 seasons (not counting what comeback in ’96). He took over for Kareem naturally and extended the Laker Dynasty which wouldn’t really return until Shaq and Kobe showed up. And who knows what happens in ’92 if he doesn’t get HIV.

#3. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar

top100jabbar

Resume

NBA MVP: 6x (’71, ’72, ’74, ’76, ’77, ‘80)

NBA Finals MVP: 2x (’71, ‘85)

NBA All-1st Team: 10x (’71, ’72, ’73, ’74, ’76, ’77, ’80, ’81, ’84, ‘86)

NBA All-2nd Team: 4x (’70, ’78, ’79, ‘83)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team: 5x (’74, ’75, ’79, ’80, ’81)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 6x (’70, ’71, ’76, ’77, ’78, ’84)

NBA Rookie of the Year: 1x (’70)

NBA Rookie All-1st Team: 1x (’70)

NBA All-Star: 19x (’70, ’71, ’72, ’73, ’74, ’75, ’76, ’77, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ‘89)

NBA Points Leader: 3x (’70, ’71, ‘72)

NBA Rebounds Leader: 2x (’76, ’77)

NBA Blocks Leader: 4x (’76, ’77, ’79, ’80)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 9x (’71, ’72, ’73, ’74, ’76, ’77, ’79, ’80, ’81)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 9x (’71, ’72, ’73, ’74, ’76, ’77, ’78, ’79, ’80)

NBA PER Leader: 9x (’71, ’72, ’73, ’75, ’76, ’77, ’78, ’79, ’81)

NBA Top 10 Points: 13x (’70, ’71, ’72, ’73, ’74, ’75, ’76, ’77, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ‘86)

NBA Top 10 Blocks: 12x (’74, ’75, ’76, ’77, ’78, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ‘85)

NBA Top 10 PER: 17x (’70, ’71, ’72, ’73, ’74, ’75, ’76, ’77, ’78, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83,’84, ’85, ‘86)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 16x (’70, ’71, ’72, ’73, ’74, ’75, ’76, ’77, ’78, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’85, ‘86)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 16x (’70, ’71, ’72, ’73, ’74, ’75, ’76, ’77, ’78, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’85, ‘86)

NBA Top 10 Offensive Rating: 5x (’78, ’80, ’81, ’83, ‘85)

NBA Top 10 Defensive Rating: 6x (’74, ’75, ’76, ’77, ’78, ’79, ’80)

NBA Career Points: 1st

NBA Career Assists: 40th

NBA Career Blocks: 3rd

NBA Career Win Shares: 1st

NBA Career WS/48: 7th

NBA Career Offensive Rating: 37th

NBA Career Defensive Rating: 24th

Best Player on Four Champions: ’71 Bucks, ’80 Lakers, ’82 Lakers, ’85 Lakers

3rd Best Player on Two Champions: ’87 Lakers, ’88 Lakers

Best Player on two Runner-Ups: ’74 Bucks, ’84 Lakers

3rd Best Player on One Runner-Up: ’89 Lakers

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 3rd

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 7th

Kareem’s resume basically speaks for itself. He had an unstoppable (literally) shot with his Sky Hook and that shot became the surest two points in NBA history. He won in the early 70s all the way throughout the late 80s. His longevity is remarkable and is only matched by Duncan in terms of playing at a high level.

Bill Simmons also showed that when considering eras, opponents and minutes played, Kareem’s early 70s stats may have been on par or even better than Wilt’s in the 60s. He helped Oscar win a title and bridged the gap to helping Magic win titles.

Again, not much to say. Best statistical center ever, overall winner, he even won tons of awards too (six MVPs, and probably shoulda won a seventh!)

#2. Bill Russell

top100russell

Resume

NBA MVP: 5x (’58, ’61, ’62, ’63, ‘65)

NBA All-1st Team: 3x (’59, ’63, ‘65)

NBA All-2nd Team: 8x (’58, ’60, ’61, ’62, ’64, ’66, ’67, ‘68)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team: 1x (‘69)

NBA All-Star: 12x (’58, ’59, ’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ‘69)

NBA Rebounds Leader: 4x (’58, ’59, ’64, ‘65)

NBA Defensive Win Share Leader: 11x (’58, ’59, ’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ‘69)

NBA Top 10 Assists: 4x (’63, ’64, ’65, ‘67)

NBA Top 10 PER: 8x (’57, ’58, ’59, ’60, ’62, ’64, ’65, ’67)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 11x (’58, ’59, ’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’69)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 10x (’58, ’59, ’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ‘67)

NBA Top 3 Defensive Win Shares: 13x (’57, ’58, ’59, ’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69)

NBA Career Rebounds: 2nd

NBA Career Defensive Win Shares: 1st

NBA Career Win Shares: 17th

NBA Career WS/48: 24th

Best Player on Eleven Champions: ’57 Celtics, ’59 Celtics, ’60 Celtics, ’61 Celtics, ’62 Celtics, ’63 Celtics, ’64 Celtics, ’65 Celtics, ’66 Celtics, ’68 Celtics, ’69 Celtics

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 2nd

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 3rd

Russell single handedly modernized basketball the first time, laying waste to the career of 50s centers like Walt Bellamy. He was the most destructive force in the NBA throughout his entire career (even though it should have been Wilt). His peers respected him so much that the voted him for five MVP awards (even during the year Wilt averaged a 50-27). Russell always stepped it up in the playoffs as well, usually limiting Chamberlain when playing against him, and setting some records himself (24.9 playoff RPG, 40 rebounds in a game, 32 in a half). Russell, a lot like Duncan right now, only brought it when he needed to. If Wilt wanted to score 60 or whatever points one night and the game was virtually over, Russell would let him.

Every player from that era (other than, again, Wilt) reveres Russell, and today the Finals MVP trophy is named after him. And as we proved with earlier sections, Russell didn’t always have the most stacked team either. (It should be pointed out he coached the last two titles too).

#1. Michael Jordan

top100jordan

Resume

NBA MVP: 5x (’88, ’91, ’92, ’96, ’98)

NBA Finals MVP: 6x (’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97, ’98)

NBA All-1st Team: 10x (’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97, ‘98)

NBA All-2nd Team: 1x (‘85)

NBA Defensive Player of the Year: 1x (’88)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team: 9x (’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97, ‘98)

NBA Rookie of the Year: 1x (’85)

NBA All-Rookie 1st Team: 1x (’85)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 3x (’88, ’96, ’98)

NBA All-Star: 14x (’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’02, ‘03)

NBA Points Leader: 11x (’85, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97, ’98)

NBA Steals Leader: 3x (’88, ’90, ’93)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 9x (’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97)

NBA Offensive Win Share Leader: 8x (’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 8x (’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ‘97)

NBA PER Leader: 7x (’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93)

NBA Top 4 Steals: 9x (’85, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96)

NBA Top 10 Assists: 1x (’88)

NBA Top 4 PER: 11x (’85, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97, ’98)

NBA Top 2 Win Shares: 11x (’85, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97, ’98)

NBA Top 3 WS/48: 11x (’85, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’97, ’98)

NBA Top 6 Defensive Win Shares: 8x (’87, ’88, ’89, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’96, ’98)

NBA Career Points: 4th

NBA Career PPG: 1st

NBA Career Assists: 42nd

NBA Career Steals: 3rd

NBA Career Win Shares: 4th

NBA Career Defensive Win Shares: 19th

NBA Career Win Shares: 17th

NBA Career WS/48: 1st

Best Player on Six Champions: ’91 Bulls, ’92 Bulls, ’93 Bulls, ’96 Bulls, ’97 Bulls, ’98 Bulls

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 1st

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 1st

I assume I don’t really need to argue this. Let’s just close up the top 100 list with some Jordan facts/stories.

Jordan holds the record for playoff PPG as well at 33.4.

Pistons Coach Chuck Daly basically said he was so good it was an embarrassment to the league, and it was insane how hard it was to gear his entire team to stop one man.

Not only was he the best offensive player in NBA history, he was one of the best defensive players as well, even winning Defensive Player of the Year!

His destruction of the Trail Blazers and Clyde Drexler in Game 1 of the 1992 Finals stands tall as the greatest “FU” performance in NBA history.

Averaged a 41-9-6 in the 1993 Finals.

Basically won Game 6 of the 1998 NBA Finals by himself. (scored 45 of Chicago’s 87 points, Pippen was injured and played limited minutes, layup, steal of Karl Malone, famous game winner ending sequence).

Just to list some of his famous playoff game winners: The Shot vs. Cleveland, The Shot II against Cleveland in ’93, the ’97 Finals Shot against Utah, and of course, the famous Game 6 winner in ’98 against Utah.

There are countless other great game winners out there for Jordan. For example, looking up the “Shot II” I found a video of Jordan beating Cleveland when playing for Washington with a game winner called “The Shot III”.

Scored 63 against the ’86 Celtics in the playoffs. With all the crazy high scoring numbers from Wilt etc., this actually stands as the highest total ever.

Look, MJ’s the best ever. I wouldn’t be writing anything new here. Maybe LeBron has a 1% shot of getting here, but I don’t like his chances.

Uncategorized

Top 100 Greatest Basketball Players Ever: #20-#11

#20. Dwyane Wade

top100wade

Resume

NBA Finals MVP: 1x (’06)

NBA All-1st Team: 2x (’09, ’10)

NBA All-2nd Team: 3x (’05, ’06, ’11)

NBA All-3rd Team: 3x (’07, ’12, ’13)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team 3x: (’05, ’09, ’10)

NBA All-Rookie 1st Team: 1x (’04)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 1x (‘10)

NBA All-Star: 11x (05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ’14, ’15)

NBA Points Leader: 1x (’09)

NBA PER Leader: 1x (’07)

NBA Top 10 Points: 5x (’05, ’06, ’09, ’10, ‘11)

NBA Top 10 Assists: 3x (’05, ’09, ‘10)

NBA Top 10 Steals: 3x (’06, ’09, ’10)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 4x (’06, ’09, ’10, ‘11)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 6x (’06, ’07, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12)

NBA Top 10 PER: 8x  (’05, ’06, ’07, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13)

Best Player on One Champions: ’06 Heat

2nd Best Player on Two Champions: ’12 Heat, ’13 Heat

2nd Best Player on Two Runner-Ups: ’11 Heat, ’14 Heat

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 28th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 49th

Dwyane Wade’s two peaks are better than what most great players can do in their careers. The 2006 NBA Finals may have been heavily weighted in Wade’s favor (no hand-checking, refs calling everything for him), but that shouldn’t discount what he did to Dallas to win the 2006 Championship. 35 PPG, 8 REB including a 42-13 in a must win Game 3, a 36 point game in Game 4 to even the series, a 43 point game in Game 5 and and a 36-10-5-4-3 in the clincher. Wade’s 2006 Finals performance was one of the best over. It also can’t be forgotten that if he doesn’t get hurt in the 2005 Conference Finals, perhaps Wade adds another Finals appearance…and maybe ring…to his resume.

In 2009 and 2010, Wade became the best shooting guard in the league. In fact his 2009 season: 30 PPG, 5 RPG, 7.5 APG on 49% shooting was probably the best Jordan impression we ever got since Jordan.

He was so good in 2010 that when LeBron left Cleveland to join Wade in Miami, people thought Wade might have been the better player. Of course these problems led to some chemistry issues that were ultimately resolved when Wade got hurt and scaled back a little bit in 2012.

Speaking of which, Wade transformed into a great 2nd banana for LeBron as the Heat went to the Finals every year LeBron was there.

When Wade was healthy and in his prime, the Heat were either a title contender or a 20 win team that somehow made the playoffs. So why is Wade only 20th? Because he wasn’t healthy enough. The last four seasons? He missed 17, 13, 28, and 20 games. He also had injury problems earlier in his career.

It’ll take a late career surge for Wade to be considered any higher. But 20th is pretty good.

#19. Karl Malone

top100kmalone

Resume

NBA MVP: 2x (’97, ’99)

NBA All-1st Team: 11x (’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ‘99)

NBA All-2nd Team: 2x (’88, ’00)

NBA All-3rd Team: 1x (’01)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team 3x: (’97, ’98, ‘99)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 1x (’88)

NBA All-Rookie 1st Team: 1x (’86)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 2x (’89, ‘93)

NBA All-Star: 15x (’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ‘02)

NBA PER Leader: 1x (’97)

NBA Win Share Leader; 2x (’98, ’99)

NBA Top 4 Points: 13x (’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’99, ‘00)

NBA Top 10 Points: 14x: (’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’02)

NBA Top 10 Rebounds: 13x (’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’00)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 14x (’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’01, ’03)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 13x (’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’01)

NBA Top 5 PER: 13x ((’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’99, ’00, ’01)

NBA Career Points: 2nd

NBA Career Rebounds: 6th

NBA Career Steals: 10th

NBA Career Win Shares: 3rd

NBA Career WS/48: 18th

NBA Career PER: 15th

Best Player on Two Runner-Ups: ’97 Jazz, ’98 Jazz

Role Player on One Runner-Up: ’04 Lakers

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 18th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 18th

Karl Malone makes it this high because of his gaudy totals and he was usually a top 5 to 10 guy in the NBA season after the season. But despite what seems to be a Top 10 resume there’s no way Malone can be that high. Everything worked in Malone’s favor other than Michael Jordan returning to the NBA in the late 90s. Season after season Malone led Jazz teams disappointed in the playoffs and when they finally made the Finals (see the John Stockton section for why they made it there) Malone’s Jazz never had a real chance to beat the Bulls. Malone had a prime chance to win the NBA Title in the lock-out shortened 1999 season where again everything lined up perfectly (no more Jordan, everyone came into the season out of shape because of the lock-out, NBA still with a super slow pace), only the Jazz surprisingly dropped a six game series to the up and coming Trail Blazers (with Malone giving an 8 point effort in the deciding game). I’m not even thinking about all the missed clutch free throws (Game 1 in the ’97 Finals and Game 7 in the ’96 Conference Finals immediately come to mind) or the fact that with the game on the line Malone lost the ball to Jordan before Jordan’s iconic ’98 Finals Game 6 shot. It should be pointed out Malone’s WS/48 takes a steep drop for his playoff career. Don’t even get me started on the fact that Malone had Stockton for his whole career. Karl Malone was great, but when push came to shove, he was always the one who lost.

#18. Charles Barkley

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Resume

NBA MVP: 1x (’93)

NBA All-1st Team: 5x (’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ‘93)

NBA All-2nd Team: 5x (’86, ’87, ’92, ’94, ’95)

NBA All-3rd Team: 1x (’96)

NBA All-Rookie 1st Team: 1x (’85)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 1x (‘91)

NBA All-Star: 11x (’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ‘97)

NBA Offensive Rating Leader: 2x (’89, ’90)

NBA Win Share Leader: 2x (’98, ’99)

NBA Top 10 Points: 6x (’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93)

NBA Top 10 Rebounds: 9x (’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’93, ’96, ’98, ’99)

NBA Top 5 Steals: 1x (’86)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 11x (’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’95, ’97, ’99)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: (’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93)

NBA Top 10 PER: 14x (’86, ’87, ’88, ’89, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’93, ’94, ’95, ’96, ’97, ’98, ’99)

NBA Career Points: 24th

NBA Career Rebounds: 18th

NBA Career Steals: 24th

NBA Career Win Shares: 13th

NBA Career WS/48: 9th

NBA Career PER: 11th

Best Player on One Runner-Up: ’93 Suns

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 19th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 20th

Just going by resume it seems like Malone should have a big edge over Barkley. But I’ll take Barkley for the following reasons.

I feel as if teams had a better chance to win with Barkley than Malone. We covered Malone’s inadequacies in his section. Barkley’s problem was that he thought he was better than he was and played that way. The difference is that it never worked in Malone’s case, where Barkley gave his ’93 Suns a legitimate chance in the 1993 NBA Finals.

Malone had Stockton his whole career. Barkley had no sense of stability ever and was still a dominate force. How great is Malone without Stockton? Impossible to tell.

Barkley was a historically great rebounder going by rebounding percentage. Malone was merely very good.

Barkley outshined Malone in the 1992 Olympics, becoming the team’s 2nd best player while Malone played a bench role.

Barkley’s career regular season WS/48 was .216 and in the playoffs it was .193, a reasonable drop (because you on average play tougher opponents in the playoffs). Malone went from a .205 to a .140. Ouch.

Malone took care of himself better and as a result had a longer career…but I’ll take Barkley any day.

#17. Julius Erving

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Resume

NBA MVP: 1x (’81)

ABA MVP: 3x (’74, ’75, ’76)

NBA All-1st Team: 5x (’78, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ‘83)

ABA All-1st Team: 4x (’73, ’74, ’75, ’76)

NBA All-2nd Team: 2x (’77, ‘84)

ABA All-2nd Team: 1x (’72)

ABA All-Defensive 1st Team: 1x (’76)

ABA All-Rookie 1st Team: 1x (’72)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 2x (’77, ‘83)

NBA All-Star: 11x (’77, ’78, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87)

ABA All-Star: 5x (’72, ’73, ’74, ’75, ’76)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 2x (’81, ’82)

NBA PER Leader: 1x (’80)

ABA Points Leader: 2x (’74, ’76)

ABA Win Shares Leader: 3x (’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA WS/48 Leader: 3x (’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA PER Leader: 4x (’73, ’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA Defensive Rating Leader: 1x (’76)

NBA Top 10 Points: 5x (’77, ’79, ’80, ’81, ‘82)

NBA Top 10 Steals: 3x (’80, ’81, ’82)

NBA Top 10 Blocks: 2x (’80, ’82)

NBA Top 10 PER: 6x (’77, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 6x (’77, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 6x (’77, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84)

NBA Top 10 Defensive Rating: 3x (’80, ’81, ’84)

ABA Top 5 Points: 5x (’72, ’73, ’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA Top 5 Assists: 3x (’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA Top 10 Rebounds: 5x (’72, ’73, ’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA Top 10 Steals: 4x (’73, ’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA Top 10 Blocks: 4x (’73, ’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA Top 10 Win Shares: 5x (’72, ’73, ’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA Top 10 WS/48: (’72, ’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA Top 5 Offensive Rating: 1x (’76)

ABA Top 2 Defensive Rating: 3x (’74, ’75, ’76)

ABA+NBA Career Points: 6th

ABA+NBA Career Rebounds: 33rd

ABA+NBA Career Steals: 7th

ABA+NBA Career Blocks: 22nd

ABA+NBA Career WS/48: 26th

ABA+NBA Career Win Shares: 13th

2nd Best Player on One NBA Champion: ’83 Sixers

Best Player on Three NBA Runner-Ups: ’77 Sixers, ’80 Sixers, ’81 Sixers

Best Player on Two ABA Champions: ’74 Nets, ’76 Nets

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 16th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 16th

Dr. J dominated the ABA. Absolutely owned it. If he had kept up that pace throughout his NBA Career we perhaps would have had a Top 10 player. But once the merger took place Dr. J was great, but not transcendent like he was in the ABA.

Erving averaged from 27-31 points per game around 11 rebounds per game (including 15.7 his rookie season) and around 5 assists per game in his ABA career. His first NBA season? 22-9-4. It’s not as if those are bad stats, but if you are putting Doc in your Top 10 and using his ABA career as the reason you need to acknowledge that the ABA was a weaker league.

With that being said, Dr. J still had a great NBA career. He got to the Finals four times (but needed Moses to actually get him the ring) and got close two other seasons. He won a MVP in 1981. He also was a solid player all the way through 1987, so longevity helps his case too.

Of course, Dr. J might be the most ground breaking player in NBA history, basically making dunking cool in basketball. That counts for something too.

#16. Oscar Robertson

BALTIMORE, MD - 1970: Oscar Robertson #1 of the Milwaukee Bucks drives to the basket against the Baltimore Bullets during the NBA game at the Capital Centre in Baltimore, Maryland. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 1970 NBAE (Photo by Walter Iooss JR./NBAE via Getty Images) *** Local Caption *** Oscar Robertson

Resume

NBA MVP: 1x (’64)

NBA All-1st Team: 9x (’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ‘69)

NBA All-2nd Team: 2x (’70, ‘71)

NBA Rookie of the Year: 1x (’61)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 3x (’61, ’64, ‘69)

NBA All-Star: 12x (’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’70, ’71, ’72)

NBA Assists Leader: 6x (’61, ’62, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’69)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 1x (’65)

NBA Offensive Win Shares Leader: 4x (’61, ’64, ’68, ’69)

NBA Top 6 Points: 9x (’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67 ,’68, ’69)

NBA Top 7 Assists: 13x (’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’70, ’71, ’72, ‘73)

NBA Top 10 Rebounds: 1x (’62)

NBA Top 5 PER: 10x (’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’70)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 11x (’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’70, ’71)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 11x (’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’70, ’71)

NBA Career Points: 11th

NBA Career Assists: 6th

NBA Career Win Shares: 9th

NBA Career WS/48: 16th

NBA Career Offensive Win Shares: 3rd

2nd Best Player on One NBA Champion: ’71 Bucks

2nd Best Player on One Runner-Up: ’74 Bucks

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 10th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 5th

To be honest, if it weren’t for one crazy statistical deal we probably wouldn’t even be talking about Oscar they way fans do. Like Wilt, Oscar’s reputation hinges upon that one statistical feat. We’ll get to Wilt soon. Oscar’s is that he averaged a triple double (with about 30 PPG no less) for the first five seasons of his career.

It’s arguably the most impressive stat on paper (even better than Wilt’s). 30-10-10 for five straight years? How could Oscar not be top 5 or at least top 10? Let’s break down why Oscar, while an impressive player, didn’t quite match his hype. His early teams during his statistical dominance admittedly weren’t as great as Russell’s or Wilt’s teams, but they had some talent. It didn’t stop Oscar’s Royals from being dispatched by a 37-43 Detroit team in the playoffs in ‘61, or the fact that he only led one team to 50+ wins in that span. He always lost to Russell’s Celtics or Wilt’s Sixers. Later Royal teams would outright miss the playoffs. Is this completely fair to Oscar? Yes and no. On one hand, it’s not his fault his team wasn’t as talented as others in a small league. On the other he never was able to rise to the occasion and pull off the big upset. This was despite those crazy statistics.

Speaking of which, sportswriters at the time didn’t seem to really respect those statistics either. Frank Delford stated that Oscar arrived at those numbers like a “.333 hitter who went 1 for 3 every game”. Heck, the Royals didn’t even want him near the end of his career, and he was traded for Charlie Paulk and Flynn Robinson. Paulk played 120 games. Robinson made one All-Star team.

Here’s Bill Simmons’ hypothetical: Imagine if 2009 Dwyane Wade played against Steve Blake and Jason Terry for 70 games and only in 12 did he play against an elite guy like Kobe and Pierce. Then add in that every power forward was 6’6” and there were only seven elite centers in a 30 team league. Lastly, imagine that there wer e8- rebounds available and 120 FG attempts every game. Would Wade average Oscar’s stats? Seems fair, right?

We didn’t even get into the fact that Oscar terrified his teammates, nevermind the idea of trying to make them better.

He makes it this high because you can’t ignore those stats either and he became a solid #2 guy for Kareem on the ’71 Bucks. It’s also worth going into the heavily racist history Oscar went through In college. It’s sadly horrifying.

#15. Wilt Chamberlain

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Resume

NBA MVP: 4x (’60, ’66, ’67, ‘68)

NBA Finals MVP: 1x (’72)

NBA All-1st Team: 7x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’64, ’66, ’67, ’68)

NBA All-2nd Team: 3x (’63, ’65, ’72)

NBA Rookie of the Year: 1x (’60)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 1x (‘60)

NBA All-Star: 13x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’71, ’72, ‘73)

NBA Points Leader; 7x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66)

NBA Rebounds Leader: 11x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’71, ’72, ’73)

NBA Assists Leader: 1x (’68)

NBA PER Leader: 8x (’60, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 8x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’66, ’67, ’68)

NBA Top 3 Points: 9x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69)

NBA Top 2 Rebounds: 13x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’71, ’72, ’73)

NBA Top 7 Assists: 4x (’64, ’66, ’67, ’68)

NBA Top 10 PER: 11x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’71)

NBA Top 4 Win Shares: 13x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’71, ’72, ’73)

NBA Top 7 WS/48: 12x (’60, ’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’72, ’73)

NBA Career Points: 5th

NBA Career Rebounds: 1st

NBA Career Win Shares: 2nd

NBA Career WS/48: 3rd

NBA Career Offensive Win Shares: 2nd

NBA Career Defensive Win Shares: 3rd

Best Player on One Champion: ’67 Sixers

Best Player on One Runner-Up: ’64 Warriors

2nd Best Player on One Champion: ’72 Lakers

2nd Best Player on Three Runner-Ups: ’69 Lakers, ’70 Lakers, ’73 Lakers

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 6th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 2nd

Think about this. Isn’t it the greatest coincidence of all time that both Oscar and Wilt put up their crazy stats in the same era?

Chamberlain’s the greatest statistical player of all time. No doubt. But despite having Hall of Fame players with him (guys like Greer, who we covered earlier) Chamberlain often fell short in the playoffs. He routinely put up absolutely insane statistics (a 100 point game, a 55 rebound game) against inferior competition. An example. In 1962 he scored 50.4 PPG in 48.5 MPG on 50.6% FG. In the playoffs that year? Same 48 MPG, but 35 PPG on 46.7% FG. In fact, Chamberlain wouldn’t win the title until the first season he took less than 25 shots a game (he took only 14). He later went on a statistics kick and went out of his way to lead the league in assists. This included passing to teammates and ignoring wide open shots.

There was also the no foul outs streak (so he’d stop playing defense if he had five fouls), his crappy FT% that actually cost his team the game (because in the famous Havlicek steals the ball moment, he said he knew the pass was never going to Wilt because he was afraid to get fouled in big moments) or most famously, the time Willis Reed limped out in MSG with a broken leg and still hit a shot despite Chamberlain being the opposing center.

Like Oscar, he dominated those he could dominate and struggled against those who could beat him. Yes, he’s great, but he’s nowhere near as great as his statistics say.

#14. Kevin Garnett

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Resume

NBA MVP: 1x (’04)

NBA All-1st Team: 4x (’00, ’03, ’04, ‘08)

NBA All-2nd Team: 3x (’01, ’02, ‘05)

NBA All-3rd Team: 2x (’99, ‘07)

NBA Defensive Player of the Year: 1x (’08)

NBA All Defensive 1st Team: 9x (’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’08, ’09, ’11)

NBA All Defensive 2nd Team: 3x (’06, ’07, ’12)

NBA All Rookie 2nd Team: 1x (’96)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 1x (‘03)

NBA All-Star: 15x (’97, ’98, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ‘13)

NBA Points Leader: 1x (’04)

NBA Rebounds Leader: 2x (’04, ’05)

NBA PER Leader: 2x (’04, ’05)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 2x (’04, ‘05)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 1x (’04)

NBA Defensive Rating Leader: 2x (’08, ’12)

NBA Top 10 Points: 4x (’00, ’03, ’04, ‘07)

NBA Top 10 Rebounds: 9x (’98, ’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07)

NBA Top 10 Blocks: 3x (’97, ’98, ’04)

NBA Top 10 PER: 9x (’00, ’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ‘08)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 7x (’00, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ‘08)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 7x (’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’08, ‘09)

NBA Top 10 Defensive Rating: 9x (’04, ’05, ’06, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’13)

NBA Career Points: 15th

NBA Career Rebounds: 9th

NBA Career Assists: 46th

NBA Career Steals: 16th

NBA Career Blocks: 17th

NBA Career Win Shares: 8th

NBA Career WS/48: 32nd

NBA Career Defensive Rating: 23rd

NBA Career Defensive Win Shares: 7th

Best Player on One Champion: ’08 Celtics

Starter on One Runner-Up: ’10 Celtics

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 22nd

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 30th

Garnett over Wilt and Oscar?

He’s the thing. Unlike Wilt and Oscar, Garnett was great in an era where his position as loaded with talent. Throughout Garnett’s career he faced off with Barkley, Malone, Duncan, Nowitzki, Webber, Gasol, Bosh and Kemp. And those are just the power forwards. He often had to deal with the opponent’s center as well. Despite this, he put up numbers during his peak that only few have accomplished in their career, and those who did do it never did it later than 1976. Garnett’s MVP season? 24-14-5. No one’s touched that since 1976. And the players who touched that were Wilt in the 60s, Baylor in the 60s, and Kareem in the 70s. Despite being 7 foot he could guard all five positions in his prime, and could even play all five if he really needed to.

Garnett never had any real help until 2004. His beat teammates were a selfish Stephon Marbury, Wally Z (who never did anything without Garnett), a past his prime Terrell Brandon, and before his prime Chauncey Billups and Tom Gugliotta. When he finally got help, a past his prime Latrell Sprewell and the underrated Sam Cassell, Garnett put up his MVP year and the T-Wolves won 58 games and made the Conference Finals. Any thoughts of KG not being clutch were put to rest in the 2004 playoffs when he finished off the Kings in his first Game 7 ever with a 32 PT, 21 REB, 4 STL, 5 BLK game shooting 12 for 23. Unfortunately, Cassell went down in the Conference Finals and despite playing some point guard, it wasn’t enough to get the Wolves past the Lakers.

Garnett’s career hit a crossroads here. While he still put up huge numbers, his prime was wasted as Sprewell got worse and Cassell stayed hurt. The Wolves made some more terrible moves…adding Ricky Davis for example and Minnesota missed the playoffs three straight years, twice having win totals in the low 30s. Garnett’s dedication to Minnesota resulted in him never demanding a trade, but luckily for his career one happened anyway when he was sent to Boston.

You can make a great argument that Garnett deserves the 2008 MVP. His stats were way down because he played less minutes…and also become the single most important defensive player in the league. He transformed the career of Rajon Rondo. He helped Paul Pierce become a winner. He brought to Boston a sense of teamwork and intensity that showed that Garnett could be a Championship level player. Only two players have ever had a season with at least an 118 offensive rating and a least a 94 defensive rating. 1992 David Robinson and ’08 Garnett. While Garnett at times looked bad in the playoffs, he still came through with some big performances (26-14-4 to clinch the title).

Garnett hung around a few more years in Boston, anchoring a top defense each year and helping Boston nearly win another title in 2010. But all that stuff about helping teammates and coming through in the clutch and such, well, you’d never hear that about Wilt or Oscar.

#13. Dirk Nowitzki

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NBA MVP: 1x (’07)

NBA All-1st Team: 4x (’05, ’06, ’07, ‘09)

NBA All-2nd Team: 5x (’02, ’03, ’08, ’10, ‘11)

NBA All-3rd Team: 3x (’01, ’04, ‘12)

NBA All-Star: 13x (’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ’12, ’14, ‘15)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 2x (’06, ’07)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 3x (’05, ’06, ’07)

NBA PER Leader: 1x (‘06)

NBA Top 10 Points: 11x (’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’12, ‘14)

NBA Top 10 Rebounds: 3x (’02, ’04, ‘05)

NBA Top 10 PER: 11x (’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ’11, ‘14)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 11x (’01, ’02, ’03, ’04, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’09, ’10, ‘11)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 10x (’01, ’02, ’03, ’05, ’06, ’07, ’08, ’10, ’11, ’14)

NBA Top 10 Offensive Rating: 6x (’01, ’02, ’04, ’06, ’07, ’14)

NBA Career Points: 7th

NBA Career Rebounds: 35th

NBA Career FT%: 14th

NBA Career Win Shares: 7th

NBA Career WS/48: 19th

NBA Career Offensive Rating: 23rd

Best Player on One Champion: ’11 Mavericks

Best Player on One Runner-Up: ’06 Mavericks

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 39th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 55th

What a crazy career we have here! Nowitzki early on seemed like nothing more than a lanky German kid who would be deemed too soft. He quickly became one of the best offensive forwards we’ve ever seen, perhaps the best since Bird. With Garnett’s career stuck in Minnesota, Nowitzki tried to lay claim…and came close…to taking that “best power forward alive” title from Duncan from 2005 through 2007. Nowitzki led the Mavericks to 60 wins in 2006 and got to face off with the Spurs in Round 2. Dallas prevailed in seven games, with Nowitzki putting up performances of 27-15 on nine shots, 28-9 on 12 shots, 31-10-4, 26-21-5 and, in the clincher, a 37-15. He added to Steve Nash’s misery in the Conference Finals, putting up a 50-12 in a crucial Game 5 that helped the Mavericks get to the NBA Finals. Dallas took a 2-0 lead on the Heat, then everything seemed to change for the worse.

You can blame Dallas’ failure in the 2006 NBA Finals on a lot of things that didn’t involve Dallas: the referees, Wade going bonkers, the huge coaching mismatch (Pat Riley vs. Avery Johnson). And while all of that is true Dallas still blew the series. They had a 9 point lead late in the 4th that would have given them a 3-0 series lead. Nowitzki fell apart. 2 for 14 with 16 points in Game 4. Only 8 for 19 shooting in a one point Game 5 loss. While he had a strong Game 6 it wasn’t enough as Miami stole the title. For a while though, things still seemed fine. Nowitzki had a great 2007. While we all mocked him for his MVP (and I did too), once we saw Stephen Curry eight years later and appreciated advanced metrics some more we realized Dirk really was the MVP that year. But then the Golden State series happened. The Warriors six game upset of the Mavericks was one of the most surreal playoff series I’ve ever seen, with Golden State doing whatever they wanted to Dallas. Nowitzki shot 38% for the series and took less shots than Josh Howard. And we all read about the toll this took on Nowitzki. While still quite good for the next three years Dallas fell into the 50-55 win range, losing in the early rounds of the playoffs. It seemed clear that Nowitzki’s chance to be a top guy on a title team was over.

And then 2011 happened. When Dallas had their best team in years, a 57-25, 3rd seeded team, no one still gave them a chance. When they went against a tough Portland team in Round 1, many pegged that to be the upset series (including Bill Simmons, who felt Portland had four of the best five guys in the series). Nowitzki trashed them with 27 points per game. Next up were the defending champs, and Nowitzki led to an at the time shocking sweep, with big games in 1 and 3. Next up were the up and coming Oklahoma City Thunder, with young superstars Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook. Once again Dallas wasn’t given a chance. Nowitzki averaged 32 a game in the series on 56% shooting, including a beautiful 48 point opener on merely 15 shots, as the Mavericks easily won the series in 5. Lastly, the ultimate test. Nowitzki was given a chance to get revenge on the Heat from five years ago. This time the Heat not only had Wade, but LeBron and Bosh as well. Nowitzki averaged a 26-10 for the series and won the Finals MVP.

Nowitzki’s has continued to be a strong player since, even nearly leading Dallas to an upset of the 2014 San Antonio Spurs in the first round (no one else remotely touched San Antonio in those playoffs). Once a disappointing MVP, Nowitzki became the player that we failed to recognize earlier because of our lack of understanding advanced metrics. He more than proved himself in 2011 and has been the reason that the Dallas Mavericks became one of the premier franchises in the NBA.

#12. Jerry West

PLEASE NOTE THIS IMAGE IS FOR USE VIA THE CONSUMER POD SITE ONLY. LOS ANGELES - 1970: Jerry West #44 of the Los Angeles Lakers drives to the basket against the Portland Trail Blazers during the 1970 NBA Game at the Great Western Forum in Los Angeles, California. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this Photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Wen Roberts/NBAE/Getty Images)

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NBA Finals MVP: 1x (’69)

NBA All-1st Team: 10x (’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’70, ’71, ’72, ‘73)

NBA All-2nd Team: 2x (’68, ‘69)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team: 4x (’70, ’71, ’72, ’73)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 1x (’69)

NBA All-Star Game MVP: 1x (’72)

NBA All-Star: 14x (’61, ’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’70, ’71, ’72, ’73, ‘74)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 1x (‘70)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 1x (‘65)

NBA PER Leader: 2x (’69, ‘70)

NBA Top 10 Points: 8x (’62, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’70, ’71, ‘72)

NBA Top 10 Assists: 10x (’62, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’69, ’70, ’71, ’72, ‘73)

NBA Top 10 PER: 12x (’62, ’63, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’70, ’71, ’72, ‘73)

NBA Top 10 Win Shares: 9x (’62, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’69, ’70, ’71, ‘72)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 11x (’62, ’64, ’65, ’66, ’67, ’68, ’69, ’70, ’71, ’72, ‘73)

NBA Career Points: 20th

NBA Career Assists: 27th

NBA Career Win Shares: 19th

NBA Career WS/48: 10th

Best Player on One Champion: ’72 Lakers

Best Player on Eight Runner-Ups: ’62 Lakers, ’63 Lakers, ’65 Lakers, ’66 Lakers, ’68 Lakers, ’69 Lakers, ’70 Lakers, ’73 Lakers

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 9th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 11th

It’s not really fair that Oscar gets credit for his averaging a triple double, but things that would have helped West (a three point line, more All-Defense team recognition), didn’t exist. West averaged 30 a game anyway. Year after year he carried his teams to the Finals just to get beat by Russell’s Celtics, and yes, perhaps if the Lakers had won at least one of those series West would get pushed to the Top 10. He actually had his own brand of jaw dropping statistics as well, only no one talks about them because they aren’t as catchy as “triple double” or “100 points in a game”. But in 1966, West finished in the Top 10 in nine different categories ranging from points per game to percentages, something no one has ever done. In the ’65 playoffs he averaged 46.3 PPG in the first round to carry the Lakers without Baylor, and averaged 40.6 PPG the entire playoffs. So yes, he had his “holy shit” stats too.

He was called Mr. Clutch, and Russell himself that West’s Game 1 in the 1969 Finals was “the greatest clutch performance ever against the Celtics”. He had 53 and 10 that game. He was so good in that series, a seven game loss for the Lakers, that the first ever Finals MVP, a trophy named after Bill Russell today, didn’t go to Russell but went to the losing West. Of course, when the ’72 Lakers were rolling, led by West, they won a record 33 games in a row, a record that still stands today and won the title.

Also, there was a time when the Warriors offered Wilt for West and LA said no. That’s worth something, right?

#11. Moses Malone

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NBA MVP: 3x (’79, ’82, ’83)

NBA Finals MVP: 1x (’83)

NBA All-1st Team: 4x (’79, ’82, ’83, ’85)

NBA All-2nd Team: 4x (’80, ’81, ’84, ‘87)

NBA All-Defensive 1st Team: 1x (’83)

NBA All-Defensive 2nd Team: 1x (’79)

NBA All-Star: 12x (’78, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’87, ’88, ’89)

ABA All-Star: 1x (’75)

NBA Rebounds Leader: 5x (’79, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’85)

NBA Offensive Rebounds Leader: 8x (’77, ’78, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’90)

ABA Offensive Rebounds Leader: 1x (’75)

NBA Win Shares Leader: 2x (’82, ’83)

NBA WS/48 Leader: 1x (‘83)

NBA PER Leader: 2x (’82, ‘83)

NBA Top 10 Points: 7x (’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’85, ’86)

NBA Top 10 Rebounds: 13x (’77, ’78, ’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ’86, ’88, ’89, ‘90)

ABA Top 10 Rebounds: 1x (’75)

NBA Top 10 Blocks: 2x (’77, 83)

ABA Top 10 Blocks: 1x (’75)

NBA Top 10 PER: 8x (’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’84, ’85, ‘87)

ABA Top 10 PER: 1x (’75)

NBA Top 4 Win Shares: 6x (’79, ’80, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’85)

ABA Top 4 Win Shares: 1x (’75)

NBA Top 10 WS/48: 6x (’79, ’81, ’82, ’83, ’85, ‘87)

NBA Career Points: 8th

NBA Career Rebounds: 5th

NBA Career Offensive Rebounds: 1st

NBA Career Win Shares: 14th

Best Player on One Champion: ’83 Sixers

Best Player on One Runner-Up: ’81 Rockets

Simmons Pyramid Ranking (2010): 13th

Slam Magazine 500 Ranking (2011): 15th

Moses’ peak is so great that he was able to knock on the door of the Top 10, but couldn’t quite get in. Despite Magic and Bird coming in, Moses remained the top dog in the NBA in the early 80s, leading a flawed Rockets team to the ’81 Finals (where they lost to the Celtics) and dominating the 1983 season and taking the Sixers to the Finals.

Moses Malone is one of the greatest rebounders of all time, and his pairing with Charles Barkley in the mid-80s could have been the greatest rebounding duo of all time. For some reason Philly traded him I guess to build around Barkley, but they didn’t get enough in return. For whatever reason, Moses didn’t match what he was doing in Houston and Philly. He was still quite good, but he wasn’t nearly as dominant.

Nonetheless, if you surrounded him with a quality supporting cast, Moses Malone guaranteed you an NBA title no matter what. Even if he had to face Kareem to do it (26-18 for Moses in the ’83 Finals, 24-8 for Kareem).

Other (DC, Marvel, Disney etc.)

RDT Reviews Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

Big spoilers here. Of course, any prequel discussion invites comparison to the originals.

Say what you want about the prequels, but the fact of the matter is the prequels did end on a strong note with Revenge of the Sith. With expectations mostly gone due to Episode I and II’s direction, all Revenge of the Sith had to deliver was the birth of Luke Skywalker and Anakin Skywalker’s transition to Darth Vader. And for the most part, it does that. But we get so much more out of Revenge of the Sith that gets buried by the failures of the previous two prequels  (I know I gave Episode I a great review, but this was and still is the fan perception).

So why does Revenge of the Sith work? Because it took out most of the stuff the hardcore fans didn’t like in the first place. There’s no comic relief here. There’s no horrid love story. We’re all-in on the demons Anakin is facing. The film from beginning to end is almost non-stop action, and each scene seems to matter. Another big reason it works is because Hayden Christensen went from an F in Attack of the Clones to about a solid C+ here. While a C+ doesn’t sound all that great, he absolutely has his moments this time around. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same for Natalie Portman’s Padme.

It’s satisfying to see Palpatine’s evil plan come to fruition. Ian McDiarmid is great here once again. And while one may roll their eyes at McDiarmid hamming it up in some scenes, that is how the Emperor acted in Return of the Jedi as well.

As for the action, there are no less than five lightsaber battles and they range from good to awesome. Anakin getting revenge on Count Dooku? Really good, especially the finish. Obi-Wan Kenobi vs. General Grievous, really fun. About Grievous, stupid cough aside, I thought he was a really fun side villain that also seemed like a bad ass. Mace Windu vs. The Emperor himself is probably the weakest of the battles, but still solid. Of course, the finish to that is Anakin’s turn to the dark side. The two finals battles are also a lot of fun, as Yoda takes on the Emperor and Obi-Wan and Anakin have the best lightsaber battle in the whole series. There’s so much more action here too. The opening sequence is probably in my top 5 favorite openings. We get to see some battles on other planets, including one with all the wookies. That’s also pretty awesome. The actual Order 66 declaration sees the Jedi get gunned down by their former allies, a combination of more action and some really good emotion.

I mentioned earlier there wasn’t a horrid love story here. But there is a decent, even ranging on good one here. Yes, some of the dialogue still sucks. But when Anakin and Padme aren’t going for cheesy lines they’re providing some strong emotional scenes. The scene where Padme tells Anakin she’s pregnant? It’s pretty awesome and Hayden really pulls it off with a mix of concern and happiness. How about when they’re both in separate rooms when Windu is going to face the Emperor and Anakin starts crying? That’s pretty awesome too.

One more point about Anakin. Once he turns evil…he looks awesome. I have little doubt at that point that he is Darth Vader. When he destroys Gunray he looks awesome. When he’s standing on that small flying droid in the battle against Obi-Wan, he looks awesome. It always felt earlier that Anakin was held back, to see him go on an all-out assault on Obi-Wan is satisfying.

Yeah, there are some silly scenes at the end. When Vader becomes Vader, we get a ridiculous NOOOOO! And we also learn Padme died of a broken heart, which was hilarious in itself. But we also get a few chilling scenes too…with Vader looking at the Death Star from a Star Destroyer, and Owen holding a baby Luke.

I didn’t even get into the story of Darth Plagueis the Wise, Obi-Wan Kenobi being pretty fun here or a bunch of other stuff. What can I say, it’s a film with a lot of good stuff in it.

Pros:

+Hayden Christensen is passable, and sometimes even more than passable, this time around.

+The transition from Anakin Skywalker to Darth Vader works well.

+Some of the love scenes are actually pretty good this time around.

+Action scenes are really good.

+Lightsaber battles are really good.

+Emperor Palpatine is really good.

Cons:

-Some silly scenes still.

-Natalie Portman is still pretty bad.

Revenge of the Sith, without a doubt, is the best Star Wars film. It may get the same grade as Empire, but Revenge had a lot more to it and didn’t have the benefit of being able to shock people like the “I am your father” line did. Revenge of the Sith had almost everything. And if this was the only Star Wars prequel ever made, people would regard it highly as well.

Grade: A