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Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews WWE Royal Rumble 2012

RoyalRumble2012

WWE Royal Rumble 2012
January 29, 2012
St. Louis, MO
Reviewed on April 19, 2014

Background: The Summer of Punk is in full gear…but sadly it already lost some of it’s luster (really, once HHH pinned Punk at Night of Champions the angle was never the same). While based off the guys holding all the belts (your champs after TLC 2011: Punk, Bryan, Ryder, Rhodes, Bourne, Kingston), we all knew The Rock was coming back soon and John Cena would be in the Mania main and HHH and Undertaker would be back. A lot of change that ultimately didn’t matter and the WWE didn’t really feel all that different until Wrestlemania XXX (and we need to wait and see how that turns out). The Summer of Punk kicked off the Reality Era…but some storylines remained old and dated. I was all for Kane coming back with the mask and all, but it already turned out to be rather comical. The result of the John Cena-Kane feud was the exact opposite of The Rock vs. Mankind in early 1999.

Anyway, the Royal Rumble is one of the most fun events in the WWE calendar year, but last year WWE took a misstep with the 40 man match. This year though the roster is WAY too thin for something like that to work, so back to 30 we are.

We are in a period where change was clashing up against the old guard. Let’s see how the Rumble works through that.

The Card

World Heavyweight Championship: Triple Threat Steel Cage
Daniel Bryan© vs. Big Show vs. Mark Henry

Story: Henry and Show had feuded over the title in 2011. After Show finally won it at TLC 11, Bryan cashed in for the belt. This made Bryan a heel. Bryan hasn’t established “YES!” yet and was a legit heel here.

Note: Mark Henry was reportedly injured here. Apparently he was getting pissed a Vince for making him wrestle. I call bs on that. I mean he was injured. But I’m sure the Rumble and Mania payoffs were just fine for him.

Big Show was an energetic face here, and it actually worked for him for a while.

Daniel Bryan chants. I guess he was getting cheered afterall.

Smart booking early on with Bryan trying to be sneaky and escape whenever possible.

Henry yelling at a ref to close that door was epic.

Tornado DDT on Show from Bryan!

Daniel Bryan wins in 9:08. Weird finish. Show Kos Henry, but Bryan breaks up the pin. Bryan runs up the cage but Big Show is on his tail. This ends up with Bryan hanging from Big Show’s arm…then finally dropping to the floor. I guess they were going with the Bryan is a fluke champion angle…which is ridiculously lame. Right guy went over, but the match and finish sucked. A lot of people thought the finish was a botch.

We get some career review of Cena. How can anyone care? I mean we know he’s John Cena, WWE legend/icon already. Whatever.

Eight Diva Tag Team Match
Natayla, The Bellas, Beth Phoenix vs. Eve, Tamina, Alicia Fox, Kelly Kelly

Matching attires for the heels!

Eve was actually a pretty good wrestler.

Hey Kelly, how about when you do a flying headscissors you don’t let go of the scissors before the bump?

Kelly with the standard fly into everyone else on the floor spot.

Team Phoenix wins when Beth pins Kelly. Actually a good finish where Beth hard tags one of the Bellas, tells her to get out of the ring and Glam Slams Kelly. Anyway, nothing special here, I guess it wasn’t horrible or anything. Certainly not good though.

Big Johnny wheels Zack Ryder into his office or something, and Ryder’s back isn’t broken anymore. Kane had chokeslammed him through the stage on RAW. This whole feud was awful…but could have worked had Ryder actually pinned Kane at the end. Big Johnny was being nice just because his job was in jeopardy and HHH was gonna fire him the next night…which didn’t happen cause of Undertaker.

Kane vs. John Cena

Huge boos for Cena. Good thing that video earlier worked.

Five minutes and a chinlock. Woo.

Totally forgot about the Claw! Awful idea for a finisher.

Double Countout in 10:56. Do I even need to explain why this finish is horrible? Kane beats the hell out of Cena in the back, then finds Ryder. Tombstone to Ryder. Eve cries. Cena’s back. Chokeslam to Cena. Kane standing tall at the end was actually nice, but otherwise, horrible all around.

Really bad start to this PPV. Thank goodness it is the Rumble, so the Rumble can save it.

Now a Rock video. Yay?

Brodus Clay vs. Drew McIntyre

Clay had just debuted as the Funkasauras. I liked it at first, but this got old by Mania.

Clay pins McIntyre in 1:05. What the Funk for the win. Nice waste of PPV time.

WWE Championship
CM Punk© vs. Dolph Ziggler

Story: Really Punk vs. Big Johnny. Laurinaitis was intending to screw Punk at the Rumble until he was informed he might be fired as GM of Raw. He was the ref for this, but decided to become a side ref instead.

Ziggler had been a hot heel as it was though.

Laurinaitis forces Vickie Guerrero to the back.

Damn Cole saying Johnny was a better worker than Booker T. Using the word worker was what was surprising there.

Punk with some great mockery of Ziggler.

Ziggler actually trips Punk on the top rope and Punk takes a back bump. That was a little nuts to be honest.

Fameasser countered into a spinning powerbomb! Nice by Punk! Hell nice by both.

Punk beats Ziggler three different ways, but Laurinaitis misses it for legit ways (well the 3rd one was questionable). Punk calls Johnny “clownshoes”, which is awesome.

GTS into a Fameasser! Crazy false finish that the fans bought hook, line, sinker.

CM Punk retains by pin in 14:33. GTS for the win. Ref and Big Johnny make the count. Great match, absolutely saved this show so far. Furthered the storytelling. For anyone who thought it buried Ziggler…look at the rest of Ziggler’s 2012. He looked great.

Royal Rumble

Most people’s favorite match of the year. Money favorite this year is on Chris Jericho, who just returned all cryptically with the end of the world stuff.

There was a gimmick for this Rumble…ANYONE can enter. Remember that.

#1 is The Miz. I think he lost a match to end up here.

Miz promo. Gonna prove everyone wrong tonight. I would have marked. We are literally at the Miz’s last great days here.

#2 is Alex Riley. Hard to believe this was a main event duo at this point last year. Sorry, but Alex Riley sucks.

Riley is gone. Whatever.

#3 is R-Truth! Just getting the Miz’s rivals out of the way I see.

#4 is Cody Rhodes!

#5 is Justin Gabriel.

#6 is Primo!

R-Truth is gone!

#7 is Mick Foley! Finally time for some fun.

Foley’s knee is shot, that run wasn’t pretty. Huge Foley chant!

Foley gets rid of Primo.

#8 is Alberto Del Rio. Wait…a broken down car comes. It’s Ricardo! Amazing!

Ricardo goes after Cody!

Foley and Ricardo send Gabriel out.

Ricardo does all the ADR mannerisms. Good stuff.

#9 is Santino! Even more nuttyness.

Some weird rolling from Ricardo and Santino. What? Santino sends Ricardo out.

Cobra vs. Socko!

#10 is Epico. Yay?

Foley with his 3rd elimination! Bye Epico.

Miz and Cody break up the Cobra vs. Socko war.

Santino and Foley are out thanks to Rhodes.

#11 is Kofi Kingston. Got a Riddler theme going here.

#12 is Jerry Lawler! Really fun so far.

Cody quickly dumps Lawler out. Gotta like Rhodes getting rid of all the fun entrants.

#13 is Ezekiel Jackson.

#14 is Jinder Mahal. Must mean Khali is soon.

#15 is The Great Khali. There goes Mahal. Jackson is gone too from Khali.

#16 is Hunico.

#17 is Booker T! Cole is upset!

Kofi with an awesome spot of handstanding on the floor and avoiding elimination. This started a trend.

#18 is Ziggler.

#19 is Hacksaw Jim Duggan! Crowd is HOT for Hacksaw!

Duggan, Khali and Booker are all gone.

#20 is Michael Cole!

#21 is Kharama! Huge surprise!

Lawler and Booker pull Cole out.

Muscle Buster to Ziggler!

Kharama gets rid of Hunico…but Ziggler takes her out.

#22 is Sheamus. Time for the serious portion of the Rumble.

Good bye Kofi.

#23 is Road Dogg! Hard to believe he’d have a tag title run in his future still.

#24 is Jey Uso. Did not care about the Usos at this point.

#25 is Jack Swagger.

#26 is Wade Barrett.

#27 is David Otunga.

#28 is the hometown Randy Orton. Huge pop.

There goes an Uso and Barrett. Poor Barrett.

#29 is Chris Jericho! No one knows who #30 is.

Otunga is gone.

#30 is Big Show. Huge groans from the crowd. Very disappointing #30.

Swagger is gone.

Show just dumps Rhodes and Miz. Horrible.

Show, Sheamus, Orton and Jericho.

Orton gets rid of Show, Jericho gets rid of Orton. Best possible scenario there.

Sheamus wins the Rumble in 54:55. They have a great match for five minutes before Sheamus Brogue Kicks Jericho off the apron for the win. Fans were 70-30 for Jericho here…but Sheamus got a good pop for the win, probably because it was pretty damn surprising he’d win when Jericho was the smart money. There are two trains of thought for this Rumble: Not good because of the thin roster and amount of silliness, or really fun with a good finish. And I am with the latter. I’ll take fun and a good finish as long as there was no ridiculous stupidity involved. I do think what holds it back from being a top tier Rumble is the first argument, but this is very good, no doubt about it.

So….

First half of the show blew. Absolutely blew. It was D quality. But then Punk and Ziggler had what had to be an A world title match, and the Rumble was a solid B+.

Historically Sheamus would win the title…but how he did it killed him. It also made Bryan. And Punk-Johnny continues. We also say Ziggler shine again in a PPV title match. So some historical significance, even if not a lot.

Tough to call. Can’t be in the As obviously, too much crap. B+ is even pushing it due to the lack of history and again, the first half was crap. So…

Final Grade: B

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews WWE Money In the Bank 2011

Money_in_the_Bank_(2011)

WWE Money in the Bank 2011
July 17, 2011
Chicago, IL
Reviewed on March 8, 2014

Background: Ever since WCW went bankrupt, American Professional wrestlers didn’t have a whole lot of leverage anymore. There was no real competition. Sure, there was TNA, but a few notable wrestlers…only one who was a sure fire main eventer at the time (and one WWE legend)…ever went there. (Kurt Angle is the main eventer…even though Jeff Hardy, Mick Foley is the legend). Other guys had other non-wrestling ventures they could look at, but usually, they came back (Big Show, Chris Jericho, Batista). In terms of North American pro wrestling, the top is WWE. The money is in WWE. The stardom is in WWE.

The case of Kurt Angle actually showed that Vince McMahon could have all the leverage. Angle…fresh off of main eventing Wrestlemania, went to TNA and ratings hardly moved. Vince had went from a system of having one or two top guys (The Hogan Era, the Austin-Rock Era) to many big guys with only one that was at the very top (an argument Vince used with Hulk Hogan regarding Hogan’s Summerslam 06 payoff). I believe this actually dilutes the product, but that’s another discussion for another time.

Creatively though, WWE had really hit a down point after a solid 2010. That glass ceiling that’s existed for years and years in WWE seemed to be in clear view of the fans. In 2010 guys like Sheamus, Wade Barrett, the Miz and Daniel Bryan were coming on strong. In 2009, the same could be said about CM Punk. All of these guys here had been something ranging from kinda buried to buried. Sheamus went from bad ass heel champion killing Triple H to joke King of the Ring to actually outright missing the Wrestlemania card in favor of a Rock promo. He only recovered in early 2012…only to get buried because of his stupid 18 second World Title win at Mania 28. Barrett was the leader of one of the most creative angles WWE had done in a while in the Nexus. John Cena squashed him and the Nexus at TLC 2010, and Barrett has never reached that level again. The Miz was the WWE World Champion coming into 2011. Maybe he was somewhat average in the ring, but his character was just pure heel heat. Cena buried him at Over the Limit 2011 in one of the worst booked I Quit Matches I can remember (it’s not that Cena won…it was how)…and then losing to Alex Riley. Bryan hadn’t really been buried, but he also missed the Mania card and seemed to just be in that jobber to stars role after a really hot 2010.

That brings us to CM Punk. WWE was still trying to make new stars, but some were not catching on or not quite ready (John Morrison, R-Truth for the former, Alberto Del Rio for the latter.) There was something different with Punk though. The fans were connecting to him. For whatever reason, WWE wasn’t listening. He eventually got a world title shot for MITB though, which was the day his contract expired. Punk delivered a famous worked-shoot promo which ushered in the reality era for WWE. Punk was supposed to be the heel, but there was not a chance in hell that was happening, especially with the PPV in Chicago. The hype was tremendous. It was the most non-Mania anticipated PPV since One Night Stand 2005. Vince got involved in the storyline. It felt real. Someone was so good, they finally had some leverage.

Some other stories for this show: Mark Henry was actually becoming a bad ass. Christian had won his first World Title and lost it to Randy Orton two days later (which was absolutely awful in a lot of ways), leading to a heel turn for Christian.

The Card

They use that awful Donald Trump theme song for the PPV. At least it has to do with the theme.

Smackdown Money in the Bank
Sheamus vs. Heath Slater vs. Justin Gabriel vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Wade Barrett vs. Sin Cara vs. Kane vs. Daniel Bryan

If I remember correctly, the smart money here was on Wade Barrett. I wonder in retrospect if that was just hope though. To be fair, he wasn’t the obvious favorite, as Sheamus and Bryan def could have won.

Cody was still doing the broken face gimmick…which is what eventually made me a fan.

There are still some remnants of the Corre vs. Nexus storyline…which we see here with Gabriel and Slater. This would be the last time we see anything resembling the Nexus though.

Bryan with a perfect top rope dropkick to knock Rhodes off the ladder. This is going to be good.

Various wrestlers doing over the top and through the rope dives…with Sin Cara finishing with his sky high plancha on Sheamus. This is fun so far and they’ve barely used the ladder!

Forgot Sin Cara had the top rope C4 in his arsenal! This has to be Sin Cara’s peak here.

Powerbomb from Sheamus off the apron through a ladder. Poor Sin Cara. I believe this was used as a storyline to injure him as he had a Wellness Violation. Brutal spot though. Sin Cara was stealing the show before that powerbomb.

Actually it looks like both Gabriel and Slater were members of the Corre. Tells you what I remember.

Cole is still anti-Bryan.

Kane and Sheamus go LOD on Bryan. Nice spot, especially when you remember LOD is from Chicago.

Fans behind Daniel Bryan. When wasn’t he over?

Slater with a nice neckbreaker off the ladder to Bryan.

Sheamus and Barrett use the ladder as a fork and Health Slater’s the meat! They somewhat botch it as they dump him into Kane…but it was cool nonetheless.

Kane chokeslams Sheamus off a ladder into a ladder that was propped on the bottom rope. Ouch!

Rhodes uses a ladder for a Disaster Kick!

450 from Gabriel on a ladder bridge on the top rope…and he nails Kane! Very impressively done!

Daniel Bryan wins in 24:27. Bryan and Rhodes fight on the top of the ladder with Bryan locking him in a front choke. Barrett tries to sneak behind and grab the title, but Bryan sees him and tries to elbow him off. Barrett teases a Wasteland on that propped ladder, but Bryan escapes and kicks Barrett in the head, knocking him off. Bryan grabs the title. By the way, the original Flight of the Valkyries being played for the Money in the Bank winner is pretty awesome. Anyway, match is fantastic. Creative. Only dull point was actually when Cara went out, as fans thought he was really hurt and he was winning over the crowd. Bryan got a good pop when he won as well.

Vince McMahon and John Laurinaitis here. Still trying to sign CM Punk.

Diva’s Championship
Kelly Kelly© vs. Brie Bella

Kelly went for a flying headscissors…but didn’t quite scissor the head.

Story here is apparently Kelly Kelly is mad that the Bellas said her Maxim shoot was airbrushed. It probably was.

Kelly Kelly does that leg stand choke that Candace Michelle did at Wrestlemania 22…and Brie counters by escaping and shoving Kelly…who falls face first on the floor! Ouch.

Brie with a leg wrap around waistelock. Not bad.

I don’t remember Brie being a good wrestler. Has this always been the case?

Brie screws up on the bulldog as she drops too early.

Bellas are much better heels than faces.

Kelly Kelly retains by pin at 4:46. Kelly hits a Rocker Dropper (the K2 or K Squared maybe?) for the win. Nikki complains that Kelly doesn’t even eat. Wasn’t there a bullying campaign being touted by WWE at this time? Anyway, pretty solid Women’s Match overall. We’re 2 for 2.

Best of Nitro DVD!

Big Show vs. Mark Henry

If you threw this match out there in 1999, it would have been absolutely horrible.

In 2008 Mark Henry went from looking like an actor playing a scary motherfucker to looking like a scary motherfucker. Why WWE wasted that in 2009-2010 I don’t know…but Henry now is full blown bad ass, and you see the difference everywhere.

Big Show with a flying shoulder tackle!

Love the selling of each other’s strength here. Show shoves Henry into the stairs and Henry actually sells by flying over them. Great.

Henry works on the knee…apparently Show was coming off a knee injury.

Half-Crab! This match is at a faster pace than I ever would have guessed.

Big Show with a shoulder tackle off the 2nd rope…but he hurts the knee!

Flawless World’s Strongest Slam…and a kickout!

Mark Henry pins Big Show in 6:00. Another WSS, and then two Splashes for the win. Henry then traps Show’s leg in a chair and drops a Vader Bomb Knee Drop (Pillmanizing!), injuring Show which would lead to some more Show vs. Henry goodness later in 2011. Exactly the win Henry needed to get him in the main event and continue to get him over as a legit bad ass. Well done. Good match. We’re 3 for 3.

2nd Stretcher of the night. First Cara, now Big Show.

Vince still hasn’t re-signed CM Punk. It’s getting close to the expiration date! Vince says he offered the most lucrative contract he possibly could. This is the man who gave Bret Hart 20 years once!

RAW Money in the Bank
Alberto Del Rio vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Evan Bourne vs. The Miz vs. Jack Swagger vs. Alex Riley vs. R-Truth

This one’s winner prediction was more clean cut. It was pretty obvious Del Rio was winning.

Booker T talks about Alberto Del Rio’s claim that it was destiny for him to become champion. Sad that he never got passed that mindset.

Even though I was disgusted with the idea of Truth main eventing Capital Punishment, he was a funny heel.

Everyone grabs a ladder to start to defend themselves, and Truth grabs a small step ladder to put over a fear of heights. Pretty funny.

Miz was still over here.

Poor Del Rio. He gets knocked around and put under a ladder on the outside, and everyone just tosses their ladders on him.

The future Awesome Truth have a step ladder duel.

Bourne and Kingston climb up an unopened ladder. You know, Kingston was the reason they were able to cut Shelton Benjamin.

Of course Cole is pro-Miz and anti-Riley.

Bourne with the Air Bourne (Shooting Star Press) from a super high ladder to everyone on the outside! That tops John Morrison’s spot from Mania 27.

Miz is hanging from the title belt and falls badly. It looks like he wrecked his knee and he screams like it. Doctors at ringside and it looks like the kneecap is dislocated. Poor Miz. He avoid stretcher #3…but is helped to the back.

Double falling hurricanrana from Bourne and Rey at the same time, which was cool.

Swagger puts on the Ankle Lock on Kingston when Kingston is hanging on the ladder!

Booker T is critical of Kofi Kingston’s dancing in matches. What a hypocrite. Spinarooni anyone?

R-Truth just botched something. I can’t really explain what.

Kofi Kingston just nails Rey with his legs on the top of the ladder. Rey falls like a dead man. Wow.

It’s the Miz! Was a face turn on the horizon? Got a huge reaction…and when Rey stopped him he got booed.

Alberto Del Rio wins in 15:54. Rey is about to win, but here is Del Rio! Rey hits Del Rio with the briefcase on top of the ladder, and it really looks like Rey is about to win…but Del Rio goes for the mask! Brilliant (if you ignore WCW)! Rey covers up and Del Rio shoves him onto the ladder next to him…which is amazing in itself since he practically can’t see as he’s hiding his face. The ladder does topple over messing up the finish, but it’s still fine as ADR climbs up and wins. Another very good match! People thought Punk was winning tonight, and Del Rio was cashing in. We’re a month early for that!

Anyway, we are 4 for 4 with 2 matches left!

Del Rio interview…he actually originally had the title match at MITB before Punk got it. This foreshadows the MITB cashing…if it happens.

World Heavyweight Championship
Randy Orton© vs. Christian

If Orton is DQed, or if there is a bad referee call, he loses the title to Christian.

Story here: As I wrote earlier, the IWC was spit at with the two days Christian title run, but it did lead to a good story. Orton seemed to feel bad for Christian. In future rematches, Christian would keep getting screwed somehow (like, he had his leg under the rope in the Capital Punishment match). Eventually, Christian turned heel as he thought WWE was protecting their “golden boy” (which fits the theme of this PPV brilliantly). Orton mentioned at first it was all respect, but now he was getting angry. Which leads of course to the DQ stip.

There were Christian’s last good days.

Christian starts by throwing a chair into the ring and sliding it to Orton. Nice.

This is a solid match, but nothing exciting is really happening, if that makes sense. It’s actually the standard for Christian.

Orton does bust out a nice dodge and roll-up from the corner.

Orton has one of the best dropkicks in wrestling.

Top rope headbutt from Christian.

Orton survives the Kill Switch.

Christian wins the title when Orton gets DQed at 12:20. Christian spits at Orton, and Orton low blows him for the DQ. Crowd pops. Orton beats the hell out of Christian and RKOs him on the announcer’s table. Table doesn’t break. You can kinda tell the refs want him to come back to try again. Table holds on the 2nd time as well. In all seriousness, it’s a basic solid match. Christian was the master of those. While the ending was stupid, it does make sense within the story. You know how HHH tells Daniel Bryan that’s he’s a B+ wrestler. That’s what Christian really was. Still though, a solid match is a solid match. We are 5 for 5. Will Cena-Punk deliver?

WWE Championship
John Cena© vs. CM Punk

Get ready for the spiritual successor to RVD vs. Cena at One Night Stand 06.

The one thing that made little sense that they had to fix in this match build-up was that there’s no good reason Vince would ever give Punk a title shot if he could leave. So, that’s how the if Cena loses he’s fired bit was added, as Cena was the one who wanted this match.

CM Punk’s entrance here is one of the greatest of all time. The crowd reaction is amazing. Punk absolutely owns the arena. Michael Jordan could show up and I think the focus would be on Punk.

It’s a shame that Punk didn’t keep “This Fire Burns” longer. The line “even through these darkest days, this first still burns” fit perfectly here.

The heat for Cena is immense.

Snapmare by Cena. BOOOOOOOO!

“You Can’t Wrestle” chants…and Punk clarifies that they are talking about Cena. Haha.

Great wrestling early. Cena really gets high on a hip toss…he has his selling shoes on for Punk, that’s for sure.

Every move Punk makes just works. The crowd is absolutely white hot here.

Punk with a leg sleeper. Punk busted out everything for this match.

Punk with a low-five to Colt Cabana!

Cena is hung on the apron…and Punk comes off the top with a knee to the back of the head!

Small botch…Punk hits a twisting crossbody, but he’s a bit too low and hits Cena’s knee.

Cena suplexes Punk to the floor from the apron!

There are a lot of finisher teases here, which really works the crowd.

Cena with a new move, a slam into a reverse DDT type move. Pretty cool.

You Can’t See Me…blocked with a kick to the head!

Suicide Dive from Punk! He hit it good too! Match is practically perfect so far.

You Can’t See Me hits! AA…but Punk almost lands on his feet. Punk then hits a sweet kick combo with a sweep! Awesome!

GTS blocked into a gutwrench slam.

Stiff knees to the face from Punk and a bulldog! That 2nd one clearly hit Cena in the face hard.

Match has steadily built up to the point where it’s concievable anyone can win.

Punk in the STF! Huge cheers when Punk gets the rope.

Punk off the top, but Cena rolls through and gets the AA. No, AA countered. GTS…amazingly countered into a STF. Incredible sequence!

Punk counters the STF into the Vise!

AA….1…2……….NO! I remember thinking that was the finish.

Cena hits a huge legdrop from the top, but Punk gets out at 2!

Another AA, I really thought this was it, but no, another kick out!

Cena goes for a top rope AA….but Punk counters into a hurricanrana!

GTS hits….but Cena falls to the outside!

Punk gets Cena back into the ring…but Vince and Big Johnny are here! Huge boos.

STF! STF! Vince sends Johnny to ring the bell!

CM Punk wins the WWE Title when he pinned John Cena 33:44. Cena knocks out Big Johnny and tells McMahon that a man is gonna win this fight. Cena goes back in and walks into the GTS, 1…2…3! Crowd ERUPTS!

Vince panics, then in an interesting move goes to the announcer’s desk and calls for Alberto Del Rio to cash in MITB. Del Rio comes, but Punk kicks him in the head and leaves through the crowd. Vince looks like he’s crying in the ring. This ending is a very weird (in an interesting way) moment, as you are mixing shoot with work elements there.

I don’t know what the greatest wrestling match of all time is, but this is without a doubt a contender. The story. The build. The layout of the match. The two characters in the ring. The two men in the ring. The moves. The false finishes. Everything. Everything hit. When WWE said that the Mania 27 Undertaker vs. HHH match was the Match of the Year, they slapped Punk and Cena in the face (that’s coming from someone who likes that match a hell of a lot). It won every other match of the year award out there.

The WWE had a goldmine waiting with CM Punk after this. But even with his eventually super long World Title reign, he was still never the man. True change never happened. The sad thing is that it fulfilled what CM Punk said in the famous shoot: Vince McMahon will make money in spite of himself.

There are six matches here and at a minimum, all six are good. That combined with the fact that you have an arguable Match of All Time candidate, well, how is this not one of the greatest PPVs of all time?

Final Grade: A+

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews WWE Over the Limit 2011

WWE_Over_The_Limit_2011_Poster

WWE Over the Limit 2011
May 22, 2011
Seattle, WA
Reviewed on April 13, 2014

Background: It is PPVs like this one that led to the Summer of Punk.

Be honest, if you are a casual fan…you probably can’t name a match on this card except for Cena vs. Miz. Disappointingly, WWE went back to the Cena and Randy Orton after Extreme Rules. The Miz at the time was one of the hottest heels in the company.Christian was seemingly finally getting a shot at the top. It all didn’t matter. Cena and Orton was the way WWE was going. On this PPV you will see CM Punk be wasted. You will not see Daniel Bryan, as he was regulated to pre-show duty. You will see the same old tired booking. The only characters that get some sort of development is Sin Cara and R-Truth.

Let’s just be real, outside of The Rock’s comeback, the first half of 2011 blew. And that only helped the effectiveness of the Summer of Punk.

The Card

R-Truth vs. Rey Mysterio

Not sure of the story here…but R-Truth had just gotten a much needed heel turn and was probably at his most entertaining…ever. This was the crazy man R-Truth. And admittedly it was awesome. He would conduct promos that made no sense and blame Little Jimmy. He cuts a promo here about a parking spot.

Rey with the off the apron hurricanrana. Nice.

Top rope bulldog from Rey! Some cool spots in this one.

R-Truth pins Rey Mysterio in 8:12. Definitely considered an upset here and Truth gets good heat. Truth wins with the Lie Detector, which is a version of the Flatliner. Decent opener.

Miz promo. Sigh, what the hell happened.

Heel Michael Cole was a lot more annoying than I remember.

WWE Intercontinental Championship
Wade Barrett© vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Story: The Corre was a spinoff group led by Barrett of the neXus. Jackson and Barrett were having problems or something. Here we are.

This is still my favorite Wade Barrett theme (End of Days).

Ezekiel Jackson wins by DQ in 7:27. Corre runs in for the DQ. Nothing to say about this match whatsoever. Practically a TV match with a TV ending.

New neXus beat up in the back. I thought Orton punted them back to developmental months ago. How about that.

Sin Cara vs. Chavo Guerrero

Man a Chavo Guerrero PPV match in 2011.

Story is kinda funny. Chavo claimed Sin Cara stole every move he knows from Chavo.

Backstage story: Sin Cara was NOT getting over. There were botches in his matches. They were using Chavo to help him have a good match.

Cara lands on his feet after a corkscrew tope which was pretty sick.

Sin Cara pins Chavo Guerrero in 7:23. Horribly botches flying head scissors for the win. Why was that the finish? Yikes. Match was nothing special. Just a bunch of spots. Maybe if this was 1996 it would be considered great. It’s amazing how overrated Mistico ended up being.

Weird Christian-Randy Orton promo. All about respect so far. Of course Christian turned later.

Here comes Alberto Del RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIO! No idea why he’s here. Pretty boring promo, and Big Show and Kane come down to end this segment.

WWE World Tag Team Championship
Big Show and Kane© vs. CM Punk and Mason Ryan

I do not remember this Big Show and Kane tag title reign at all.

Kane: “I’m already disappointed we didn’t have the rapture yesterday”. I laughed.

CM Punk chants. I feel bad for him here.

Mason Ryan is so bad.

Punk was already doing the Randy Savage tribute, which is nice.

Big Show and Kane retain when Kane pins Mason Ryan in 9:06. Double chokeslam for the win. Pretty damn forgettable, just like this tag title reign. I guess it wasn’t awful or anything.

WWE Diva’s Champion
Brie Bella vs. Kelly Kelly

I have no idea what the story here is. Not sure if Kharma already disappeared as this point.

Nunzio is YOUR referee.

Michael Cole: “Ugh, we have to sit through another boring Divas match”.

Brie Bella retains when Nikki Bella pins Kelly Kelly. TWIN MAGIC. I could think of two reasons why that doesn’t work anymore. Er…pretty boring match even by Divas standards. Half of it was an armbar.

World Heavyweight Championship
Randy Orton© vs. Christian

Story: Christian had a feel good story when he won the World Heavyweight title at Extreme Rules. He lost it five days later to Orton (which pissed off the IWC). Rematch here. To be fair, the way Christian left the ring that Smackdown was pretty awesome acting.

This is just a solid back and forth contest. It was done this way to try to make it seem that Christian was on Orton’s level.

There’s a lot of counters in this match as Christian said with full preparation he could beat Orton. So for example, Orton’s rope DDT was countered.

Randy Orton with a really cool inverted Walls of Jericho. How random but awesome.

Really cool spot where Christian faked out Orton with the corkscrew body press (Orton countered that into a RKO to win the title). Too bad Christian would fall for this 2 years later.

Christian looks to pay tribute to Edge with a Spear, but Orton powerslams him.

Great false finish! Orton hesitates on a punt, and Christian gets a spear for two!

Randy Orton retains by pin in 16:52. Awesome finisher counter sequence, then a countered back suplex into a RKO for the pin. Great match. Orton and Christian had awesome chemistry in the ring.

Kiss My Foot Match
Michael Cole vs. Jerry Lawler

Ugh, this feud needed to end two months ago at Wrestlemania.

Story: Cole’s love for The Miz turned him into a heel. That spawned a really annoying announcer feud…although one where Michael Cole was a great heel for a while. But it needed to end at Mania with Lawler killing Cole. Cole won with some bs in a 15 minute match. At Extreme Rules Cole and Jack Swagger beat Lawler and Jim Ross. Now we are at a Kiss My Foot Match.

Cole comes out limping and cuts a promo. Doctor’s note! He’s trying to get out of the match.

Ref tears up the note. Okay then.

Cole gets his pants torn up.

Michael Cole takes off his shoe and it’s disgusting. Why is this on PPV.

Cole into the Colemine!

Jerry Lawler pins Michael Cole in 3:01. Flying fistdrop for the win. Basically what should have happened at Mania. It takes Eve, JR and ultimately Bret Hart to get Cole back in the ring when he tries to avoid kidding Lawler’s foot. Sharpshooter + Lawler shoving his foot up Cole’s mouth is the payoff. Woo?

WWE Championship: I Quit Match
John Cena© vs. The Miz

Story: Cena won the title at Extreme Rules in a Three Way Cage match. Miz’s rematch.

It’s amazing watching Miz here…and how bad he is now. Miz was awesome in late 2010-early 2011.

Miz tells Cena since it’s no DQ, Alex Riley can help him and it will basically be a 2 on 1. Miz gives Cena the chance to quit right away. Cena obviously says no.

Miz and Riley dominate Cena. Cena refuses to quit! Sigh.

Near the end of this ridiculously boring match Miz does a Skull Crushing Finale on a chair in the ropes. That was kinda cool. Although, the way Cena hit the chair might have been a botch. Of course Cena will never quit, so who really cares.

Miz asks a kid in the crowd to ask him to tell Cena to quit. Innovative I guess?

Chairshot to the head! I thought those were banned.

OMG Cena quits! NEW CHAMP! What’s this? Ref finds a phone? Who cares. Oh it’s Riley’s having a Cena “I Quit” recording in there. Oh…can’t we ignore it?

Match restarted. Second time in two matches between them.

SUPERCENA.

John Cena retains when Miz quits in 24:56. STF for the win. This match is horrible. Arguably the worst main event in WWE PPV history. And it’s neither man’s fault (although I’m sure people backstage blamed Miz), the story is just horrid. Miz and Riley beat up Cena for TWENTY minutes. WAY TOO LONG. Dusty Finish was overkill. And then, Cena beats up Miz for two minutes and Miz quits. This KILLED the Miz and Miz never recovered (although he almost did with Awesome Truth). Absolute burial. There was money in the Miz and it was flushed down the toilet here. Probably the worst occurrence of Super Cena ever. It’s fine if you want Cena to go over…but how a back and forth I Quit match? Why was this the story? The only positive is the match getting restarted I think led to the conspiracy angle…which led to Awesome Truth. Ugh. Just ugh.

Absolutely forgetful. Nothing on this show mattered long term other than Miz’s demotion (he would LOSE to Riley next month). Orton and Christian would have three other PPV matches. I don’t even remember what else happened on this show. No wonder CM Punk was disgusted.

Close to F status for the uneventful card and horrid main event…thank Christian and Orton for having a great match.

Final Grade: D

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews WWE Summerslam ’10

SummerSlam_(2010)

WWE Summerslam 2010
August 15, 2010
Los Angeles, CA
Reviewed on June 22, 2014

2010 was an interesting time for WWE as they had shockingly tried something new: The Nexus. The Nexus were a string of rookies from the newly formed NXT that came in and just began destroying everything NWO style, and it was very fresh and interesting. And after some Triple H, John Cena, Batista and Randy Orton title reigns, WWE needed interesting.

Also of note was that one of those rookies, Daniel Bryan, was released new the beginning of the angle when he choked out Justin Roberts with his tie. We were still too close to the Chris Benoit tragedy for anything like that to happen…although maybe it was a worked shoot the whole time? (I mean, HHH and HBK had used Crossfaces in the past).

In theory, Summerslam should have made some stars within the Nexus. Did it do that? Let’s find out.

The Card

Intercontinental Championship
Dolph Ziggler© vs. Kofi Kingston

I’m not sure about the story here, but I know Dolph and Kofi wrestled each other a billion times (not an estimate) from 2009 through 2012, so I doubt this has a serious story attached to it.

Kofi misses a pretty awesome looking suicide dive. What a start.

I haven’t noticed since Kofi has been stale for years, but there is a difference between 2010 Kofi and 2014 Kofi. 2010 Kofi was better.

Draw in 7:05. Nexus comes in and beats the crap out of both. I guess I’d rather them not do that in a title match, but it serves a good purpose I guess. We do get a Barrett promo out of it, and Barrett owned on the mic then too. Good match for 7 minutes.

Team WWE needs a 7th teammate. Jericho and Edge try to convince The Miz to join the team. Miz isn’t sure Nexus should be his priority though.

Diva’s Championship
Alicia Fox© vs. Melina

Is this the famous Fox vs. Melina match?!

Yikes, Melina comes out dressed like a cross of Pocohahantas and a Las Vegas showgirl.

I never got Melina as a face. And until very recently I didn’t understand how Alicia Fox had a job.

Michael Cole calls Melina one of the all time greats. Yeah I’m sure.

There’s some leg psychology here. That’s always fun.

Melina wins the title in 5:22. Melina hits that cutter facebuster for the win. You know, it really wasn’t that bad. It was a Melina squash basically. Alicia Fox’s offense looked horrible but she was barely on offense so it didn’t matter. Melina’s scream is the worst though. Melina cries because she won the title in her hometown or something. Here come the Co-WWE Women Champs Laycool! Laycool owned has heels here. This led to the unification match at some PPV in the future. They take out Melina.

The Big Show vs. CM Punk, Luke Gallows and Joseph Mercury

Ugh. No wonder Punk wanted to leave in a year.

Punk was the main event of Summerslam 2009 and is now regulated to the joke handicap match.

The story here began when Punk lost his hair to Rey. Then he got involved with Big Show, who unmasked Punk and revealed his bald head.

Ha, Punk comes out with a “I broke Big Show’s hand” t-shirt (which the S.E.S. did in an angle). Punk is always great.

Big Show owns Mercury and Gallows. On the Show-Punk face off, there are huge CM Punk chants. Way to be a top face Show.

Big Show wins when he pins Mercury and Gallows in 6:45. Show chokeslams Mercury on Gallows for the win. Punk was pretty good and you can tell Mercury was wrestling to keep his job, but I mean, this is pretty much a waste on a Summerslam card. I forgot if this actually led to a Big Show vs. Punk match.

Kane cuts a promo with a casket. He runs into WWE Champ Sheamus. A little bit about Kane here. The whole Undertaker in a vegetative state angle was pretty fucking stupid. And then it got worse when Kane blamed Rey Mysterio of all people of going it. Like I’m supposed to remotely believe that Rey Mysterio took out the Undertaker. We all knew it was gonna be Kane.

Sheamus tells Kane to stay out of his way. Was Kane in his way in the first place?

Miz joins the team after pointing how they begged him.

WWE Championship
Sheamus© vs. Randy Orton

We actually did this match at the Royal Rumble in the whole Legacy implosion. In this case, Sheamus won the title at Fatal Four Way on a kinda fluke.

There’s definitely improvement from the Sheamus who was in the World Title match at the Rumble and this Sheamus…but this match is still pretty boring.

Sheamus counters a RKO late and Michael Cole blows the call. Nice.

To be fair this match has picked up towards the end. I think Orton just turned face a few months prior…and the crowd is super hot for him.

Orton wins by DQ in 18:55. Sheamus brings a chair in. When the ref tries to take the chair from him, Sheamus sends the ref out for the DQ. Awful finish. Sheamus doesn’t even get a chair shot in as Orton RKOs him on the table. So not only did Sheamus not beat Orton, he got beaten down by him. No wonder no one cared about him until he won the Rumble 16 months later. Horrible horrible ending. This is Summerslam?

World Heavyweight Championship
Kane© vs. Rey Mysterio

Somewhere smack in the middle of this strange Kane-Undertaker vegetative state angle was Kane winning MITB and the World Title from Rey, and blaming Rey for taking out Undertaker. Did anyone buy Rey being the man to take out Undertaker? Anyone?

Kane and Rey had some mask feud not that long ago either. These two have never had good chemistry in the ring.

A lot of early bearhugs.

Rey’s in the casket! He fights out though.

Kane retains by pin in 13:32. Chokeslam for the win. Match was pretty bad. Kane just isn’t the guy for Rey to have good matches with. There was a good spot at the end where Kane put his feet up too early to counter the West Coast Pop Splash…but Rey seemed to improvise and counter that instead of looking like an idiot.

Kane is gonna stuff Rey in the casket now…and when Kane opens it it’s empty, leading to an audible groan from the crowd. Rey tries to fight it, but Kane chokeslams him again. Rey even gets Tombstoned this time. Kane opens the casket again…and it’s THE UNDERTAKER! Huge reaction! He looks pretty damn old here though (he somehow aged like 10 years from the Mania match with Shawn). Taker turns to Rey and asks him why he did it before beating the crap out of the obvious culprit, Kane. Shockingly, Kane gets the upper hand and lays out Taker (and Taker put him over on three straight PPVs). Good pop, even for the obvious here. This would lead to Taker’s last long non-Mania program.

Elimination Match
Nexus vs. Team WWE

Miz shows up, but Cena says they already have a partner…Daniel Bryan! Big pop for Bryan.

So it’s Otunga, Sheffield, Tarver, Barrett, Gabriel, Young and Slater vs. Cena, Edge, Jericho, Morrison, Bryan, Bret Hart and R-Truth.

Note: this is Bret Hart’s last PPV match, and interestingly wrestled his last WWE PPV main event after HBK did. Even as late as December 2009, what were the odds of that? 10,000 to 1?
Bret Hart actually looks pretty good here. It’s a shame he couldn’t get hit in the head, he probably could have had a solid run otherwise.

Bryan makes Darren Young submit in a minute. I guess that continues the tradition of a submission wrestler taking out the exotic haired black guy in 45 seconds at Summerslam with a Crossface (reference to Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan…and that reference could have went further).

Lawler calls Bryan Bryan Danielson on air. Ha.

Morrison eliminates Tarver with Sharship Pain at the 4 minute mark. 7-5 WWE advantage.

Sheffield is the first Nexus guy in this match to look like a threat as he kicks the crap out of Morrison.

Gabriel cheap shots Morrison and Sheffield takes him out with a clothesline to take him out. Sheffield then takes out R-Truth with another clothesline and suddenly it’s tied. I’ll complain about Truth being in this later.

Michael Cole says that if Bret could lead team WWE to victory it would be his greatest Summerslam moment of his career. Screw that winning the WWF title from Undertaker in 1997 or having one of the greatest matches ever at Summerslam ’92.

Bret locks Slater in the Sharpshooter, and Barrett tosses a chair in. Bret smacks Sheffield with the chair for the DQ…then blames Barrett for bringing it in. I can’t think of a time that didn’t work. Anyway, Bret’s gone in the only way he could be.

Edge spears Sheffield and we are down to 4 vs. 4. Cena, Bryan, Jericho and Edge vs. Gabriel, Otunga, Barrett and Slater.

Otunga taps to a botched Walls.

Jericho accidentally runs into Cena, and then gets hit with a rear naked choke drop by Slater and Slater eliminates him.

Edge and Cena argue, then Slater shoved Edge into Cena and rolls him up to take him out! Nexus with the 3-2 lead!

Bryan owns everyone and makes Slater tap (amazingly, Bryan’s moveset is exactly the same three years later). Miz comes back and takes Bryan out with the briefcase. Barrett pins Bryan.

Cena vs. Barrett and Gabriel.

DDT on the concrete! Cena’s out cold! CAN HE COME BACK?! Even Lawler and Cole thinks its hopeless.

Team WWE wins when Cena makes Barrett submit in 35:18. Gabriel misses the 450, and Cena pins him. Barrett then just runs into the STF and that’s that. Very disappointing and a lot worse than I remember it. This match buried Nexus as any kind of threat. The only people they beat legit were Morrison and Truth. Bret got DQed. Jericho ran into Cena and got fluke pinned. Edge argued with Cena and got fluke pinned. Miz attacked Bryan. Cena of course OVERCAME the odds. Ugh. No idea how Barrett dragged this to December.

The debate of how significant this match was is Daniel Bryan’s comeback. I think it’s a good moment and it gave Bryan a good push out of the gate…but once he won the US title WWE did nothing with him for a good 10 months. He did wrestle a bunch of pre-PPV matches (Wrestlemania, Over the Limit, surely there is more) so there is that. So this all turned out to be meaningless.

Here’s my problem with the idea of the match as well. The commentators were selling it as the most important match in WWE history and all of that. So why then is R-Truth on the team? Shouldn’t Randy Orton or I don’t know, the WWE Champion Sheamus be on it instead. To an extent that thinking applies to Morrison and even Bret Hart.

This PPV is full of bullshit finishes and is pretty forgettable. All Summerslam 2010 got was the further development of The Miz as a main event star. Most of Nexus became nothing significant from their run in Nexus. Even Barrett…practically a sure thing, got lost in the shuffle with the Corre later. For a match with a lot of young guys the lack of historical significance is surprising.

I guess you can also say its Bret Hart’s last WWE PPV match, but no one remembers it for that.

Nexus should have been so much better. There was so much potential here.

Forgettable and overall too many weak finishes. Could have been worse but there was decent wrestling scattered around this show.

Final Grade: C

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews WWE TLC 2009

TLC_Tables,_Ladders_&_Chairs_(2009)

TLC 2009
December 13, 2009
San Antonio, TX
Reviewed on April 19, 2014

Background: While there were new guys coming along…Vince just wouldn’t allow his top guys to not get the main event money.

Not that it was really his fault. Vince had been burned once again by pushing someone to the top, as Jeff Hardy didn’t immediately resign with WWE once his contract expired. WWE had put three world titles on Jeff in the 9 months before this and he still would jump to TNA in January. For all those who complain that Vince keeps guys like Cena, HHH, Taker, Orton etc. at the top, it’s because he knows these guys won’t just leave him in the smoke. Ever since Bobby Lashley kinda did the same in early 2008, Vince had begun this holding pattern of rocket pushing someone, then burying them for a while (I guess to establish that WWE is responsible for their success) and then determining what to do from that point. We see two stages of this here: the burial (we don’t actually see it, but the World Champion two months ago, CM Punk, loses the dark match to R-Truth) and the mega push (Sheamus, who would be in the burial stage about 10 months from this point. Interesting note, you can argue Vince was somewhat right about Punk, as he did walk out four years later.

Anyway, there is one new guy who may become a star tonight: Sheamus. Other than that, your main events have Undertaker, Batista, Cena, HHH, Jericho, Big Show and HBK in them. Not exactly building the next generation.

Another point, 2009 was the first year of just theming events (Hell in a Cell was two months earlier) and it’s always going to be disappointing. Gimmick matches should fit the feud, not be forced upon because so and so PPV is coming up. Oh well.

The Card

ECW World Championship: Ladder Match
Christian© vs. Shelton Benjamin

This actually sounds like an awesome idea and exactly what the ECW Title should be about.

Story: Christian wants to steal the show!

Michael Cole owns Matt Striker on commentary. Good stuff.

Nice knee to the spine from Shelton there.

Shelton lands on his feet from a monkey flip. He almost botched it, but it was good enough.

Christian gets busted open as a ladder falls on his face. Ouch.

We get an official tending to Christian. I don’t understand why this is happening. Shelton, just go get the belt! Stupid idea.

Benjamin hits a somersault plancha on Christian on the floor from the ladder…but that was a stupid spot as well. Christian wasn’t staggering or anything and even tried to climb the ladder to stop Shelton. How about running away Christian? Think of that?

Reverse DDT off the ladder. Nice.

Something you don’t see every ladder match, Christian actually stopping midclimb as he saw Shelton was gonna do something to him. Nice psychology. Shelton follows it with some awesome athleticism, which leads to this ladder falling clotheslines.

Powerslam off the ladder. Some really nice spots in this one.

Awesome spot where Christian hands from the belt holder…and lands on Shelton who powerbombs him into a ladder in the corner.

Shelton gets the sunset flip over the ladder spot and Christian counters into a hurricanrana into the corner!

Christian splashes Benjamin through a ladder!

Christian wins in 18:05. After the splash, Christian goes up and grabs the title. What a fun opener. Some underrated psychology with the spots looking natural instead of contrived (which is why the first MITB is better than the others, for the record). The middle part where Christian was bleeding hurt it a bit, but a fun match is a fun match. Good chance at being the match of the night.

Intercontinental Championship
John Morrison vs. Drew McIntyre

This was pre-good music for McIntyre.

McIntyre was McMahon’s chosen superstar, which in hindsight, is hilarious. Could have tied that into a Vince is losing his mind at an older age gimmick.

Although I’m probably higher on McIntyre than most, he was not nearly ready for the big time yet.

Really nice tilt a whirl into a DDT counter from Morrison.

Reverse Alabama Slam was pretty cool from Drew.

Morrison with a Disaster kick off the apron. Nice.

Horrible Starship Pain there.

Drew McIntyre pins John Morrison to win the title in 10:19. Scot Drop, or Future Shock DDT for the win. Morrison carried McIntyre here as Morrison did anything entertaining in this thing. Decent match overall, but no one cared about who went over.

WWE Women’s Championship
Michelle McCool© vs. Mickie James

I think this was part of the Piggy James storyline.

Ok it was. Honestly I would have been fine with the whole angle…if James wins at the end of course.

This is a pretty good Diva’s match.

Michelle McCool retains in 7:31. Layla shoves Mickie off the top rope…but she spin kicks Layla off the apron. Roll up gets 2, but then McCool hits a brutal kick to the face for the win. Pretty good Diva’s match, a lot of hard hitting and a nice finish.

WWE World Championship: Tables Match
John Cena© vs. Sheamus

Story: Sheamus won an up and comer battle royal. He destroyed everyone on ECW. He put Mark Cuban through a table. He ended Jamie Noble’s career. He was a legit bad ass. So CAN CENA OVERCOME THE ODDS?!

I know the general idea is everyone is better as a heel, lol. But…Sheamus was a real bad ass as a heel. This should be his character now.

Fans want Sheamus to win. Can Cena be cheered against anyone?

At least this match has been 50:50, and not Cena just killing Sheamus.

Match really picks up when Cena and Sheamus brawl on the outside.

Sheamus throwing the table out of the ring when getting beat up by Cena was a great spot.

Sheamus wins the title when he “shoves” Cena through a table at 16:19. They tease a superplex spot…but Sheamus shoves Cena off the top and falls off himself, but Cena crashes through the table in the ring. Awful finish. Many thought it was a botch as Sheamus lands near a table on the outside. I don’t think so though as they act naturally afterwards. Nonetheless, finish sucks because it doesn’t put Sheamus over! It looks like a mistake, that Sheamus got lucky! If you are gonna go with him, GO WITH HIM. Cena can take a loss here. Jeez. Sheamus’s reign goes horribly too, as he’s an undercard champ and a transitional champion…and his reign meant NOTHING in terms of historical value. Whatever. The match itself wasn’t bad though.

World Heavyweight Championship: Chairs Match
The Undertaker© vs. Batista

Batista turned heel on Rey Mysterio and it was damn refreshing. Batista as always, wanted the title. So here we are.

I have high hopes for this, as Taker and Batista had oddly great chemistry in 07-08.

In a Chairs match, the only legal weapon is a chair.

I do like how Batista didn’t waste time and went right for a chair.

Batista uses a chair shot and a low blow to win the title? How weak was that?

The Undertaker retains the title by pin in 13:14. Teddy Long comes out and says the low blow is still illegal, so the match is restarted. Boot and Tombstone for the win. The finish somehow got worse! I thought Teddy Long was a heel at this point? No wonder neither World Title match was the main event, both finishes blew. Also, this match never connected and was slow the whole way. Ah well.

Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston

There was a Kofi-Orton segment right before this where Kofi calls Orton a coward. Ok then. Weird timing for that.

This was the trying to get Kofi Kingston over as a top guy attempt. Never stuck.

Randy Orton pins Kofi Kingston in 13:11. RKO! Not much to say here. I guess Kofi wrestled Orton 50:50, which was nice to push Kofi, but some guys are just meant to be midcard fun babyfaces, and one of those guys is Kofi Kingston. Match was completely uneventful.

Batista confronts Teddy Long. He says he was robbed (he was) and Long better make it right.

WWE Unified World Tag Team Championship: Tables, Ladders and Chairs
Chris Jericho and Big Show© vs. Triple H and Shawn Michaels

You know I laughed that this was main eventing and neither World Title matches were (same happened at HIAC), but with it being in San Antonio for Shawn and the fact that both World Title matches had bs finishes, I’m okay with it.

DX was probably the hottest act in the company at that point too, so I guess that helps justify it.

Odd portion near the beginning where Big Show and Chris Jericho fight HHH on the rampway…then HBK joins then, HBK…GO FOR THE BELTS!

Dueling chairs!

Suplexing a ladder on Jericho. Ouch.

Pretty cool spot where they hang HHH in the tree of toe in the ladder, then send Shawn flying into him…where Shawn does his corner flip.

That had to be the best punch to the chair I’d ever seen. Looks like it killed HHH.

Big Show actually takes the flying off the ladder hanged on the top rope spot, nice.

Pedigree right after looks terrible though.

Big Show breaks a ladder for no reason. Odd.

A DX ladder sandwich…and Big Show breaks another ladder.

DX wins the Tag Team Titles at 22:32. Pretty funny ending. Show takes out DX, but there’s no ladder in the ring since Big Show broke them. Jericho tried to balance himself on Show’s shoulders…but this fails as Jericho can’t free his hands to grab the belts. DX comes back in, and Show and Jericho are stuck. Sweet Chin Music to Show…and that sends Jericho flying to the outside and he hits a table face first. Another SCM, then HHH holds up the half ladder and HBK grabs the belts. Not bad. A little slow at times but it was pretty good otherwise. It was a ladder match disguised as a tornado tag match, which was quite refreshing actually.

Kinda tough to review. Most of the matches were good…but none of them were great (maybe Christian vs. Shelton was close). Both World Title matches having bs finishes sucked. Main ended the right way though. Historically, this show probably hurt Sheamus more than helped him, which is crazy since he won the World Title. DX winning the tag belts didn’t mean a whole lot, they lost them to Miz and Show a couple of months later.

Maybe I could get this into the B range had Taker vs. Batista not sucked. Or if Orton vs. Kofi mattered at all. But they didn’t. Can’t ignore the mostly good wrestling though.

Final Grade: C+

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews WWE Unforgiven 2008

Wweunforgiven2008poster

WWE Unforgiven 2008
September 7, 2008
Cleveland, OH
Reviewed on March 5, 2014

Background: 2008 was something of a bounce back for WWE. WWE was experimenting in trying to build new stars and they ranged from sure fire future superstars (Jeff Hardy, CM Punk) to intriguing (The Brian Kendrick, MVP, The Miz, Cody Rhodes and Ted Dibiase). There was also the rebuilding of some stars that quite never hit their potential…but WWE hadn’t given up yet (Matt Hardy, Mark Henry, Shelton Benjamin). This made for a very interesting time in WWE.

It is also worth pointing out that this is a John Cenaless PPV. There aren’t many of these post 2002, and there aren’t many without him on or near the top post 2004. It is always interesting to see the quality of a PPV without him.

Some quick storyline recaps here: For Smackdown, it seems inevitable that Jeff Hardy is going to win the World Title. Wrestlemania 25 seems like the best bet, but for the time being he’s a solid #2 behind World Champion HHH…and whenever Edge would return (note: Edge returned at Survivor Series…Hardy won the title at Armageddon).

On RAW, CM Punk shocked the world and cashed in MITB on Edge, winning the World Title. To be fair though, it may have been a little too early. In Punk’s defense though (and as his documentary stated), WWE didn’t give Punk nearly the proper build as a guy who supposed to be the top guy on RAW. I do think Punk’s time came next year though.

ECW…while not the ECW of old, had turned into a fun weekly show. Matt Hardy was doing the poor man’s version of what Jeff was doing on Smackdown and mainly feuding with Mark Henry.

I should also point out that Shawn Michaels and Chris Jericho hate each other! Probably since Jericho hit Shawn’s wife.

Let’s go over the Scramble Match though, as there are three of them on this card. It works very similarly to the Wrestlemania 2000 Hardcore Battle Royal and a Royal Rumble combined. Two men start and every five minutes another one enters until all five men are in. Then there is five minutes after that until the match ends. Anyone can pin anyone at anytime, and if successful becomes the interim champion. Whoever is the interim champion at the end of the time limit is awarded the title. I actually have several issues with the Scramble match that I’ll detail at the end of the review.

The Card

ECW Championship Scramble
Mark Henry © vs. Matt Hardy vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. The Miz vs. Finlay

First Championship Scramble. I never really liked the look of the new ECW title. Title belts should be gold.

Matt Hardy is #1. The Miz is #2!

Fans are pretty hot for Matt. For the record Matt would never be this high again, as 2009 was a down year for Hardy, and he didn’t last through 2010.

Miz hits this cool spot where Matt is on the 2nd ropes (in 619 position), only Miz runs up Matt’s back, jumps over the top rope and hits him in the back of the head. Don’t remember seeing that one before.

#3 is Chavo Guerrero.

Chavo quickly hits a Frog Splash on Matt and gets the three. He’s the interim champ.

Matt Hardy hits the Side Effect on Chavo get become interim champ.

#4 is Mark Henry. Somebody gonna get their ass kicked!

Henry was finally coming into his own in 2008.

World’s Strongest Slam on Chavo…he regains control of the title!

Finlay’s the last one in, Hornswoggle is here too. 5 minutes left in the match!

Shillelagh shot to Henry! Finlay nails Hardy with the Celtic Cross and controls the title!

Twist of Fate to the Miz, Matt Hardy controls the title with 3 minutes to go!

Matt Hardy wins the ECW Title in 20:04. Nice ending as Matt Hardy breaks up about 20 different pin attempts and holds on. Match was pretty average overall. Set up Hardy vs. Henry as Mark Henry never lost a fall.

World Tag Team Championship
Ted Dibiase and Cody Rhodes © vs. Cryme Tyme

Story here is that Cryme Tyme actually stole the tag belts, but Dibiase and Rhodes got them back. This was an important point in the formation of Legacy.

This is a very meat and potatoes tag team match. JTG is the babyface in distress. It’s pretty boring unfortunately.

Cody Rhodes and Ted Dibiase retain when Rhodes pinned JTG in 11:35. Pretty cool ending sequence that ends with Dibiase reversing a small package that JTG had on Rhodes. Match was pretty damn boring though. Cryme Tyme attacks Dibiase and Rhodes, but we get the debut of Manu to help them out! Woo?

Unsanctioned Match
Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

Let me just say this. When Chris Jericho came back in 2007, after an initially good response, he kinda fell flat. This feud is what transformed Jericho back into a surefire main eventer.

Jericho and HBK had some issues in the summer (Jericho even threw HBK into the jeritron…which was a big screen tv), but it all came to a head at Summerslam. HBK was announcing his retirement…and Jericho got involved. HBK told Jericho that he could tell his kids he will never be HBK. Jericho responded by trying to hit HBK…but HBK ducked and Jericho hit HBK’s wife.

I will say that the idea of an unsanctioned match is stupid. It’s in a WWE ring. With a WWE ref. On a WWE PPV. But that’s beside the point and a small nitpick.

It’s a slugfest to start and HBK beats the crap out of Jericho with his boot.

We’ve got a table! Jericho goes for a powerbomb but HBK fights out.

Jericho with some chair action!

Jericho goes for a vertical suplex from the ring through the table on the outside…but another block from HBK.

HBK makes a comeback and goes for Sweet Chin Music, but stops, instead deciding to beat the hell out of Jericho some more.

Crossface!

Jericho is able to slam HBK’s face into a chair in the corner…and then focuses on the injured eye from the summer.

Walls of Jericho. Apparently HBK told Michael Cole about some bible verse about the fall of the Walls of Jericho or something.

Somehow HBK is able to grab a fire extinguisher while in the Walls…he gets out by spraying Jericho of course.

HBK suplexes Jericho on the ramp. Ouch!

Lance Cade in the house! He’s on Y2J’s side here and attacks HBK. HBK dispatches him quickly.

Cade gets a shot in and hits a clothesline which HBK sells by spinning in air and landing on the concrete floor.

HBK has an injured arm, and Jericho wraps it around the post as Cade hits it.

Chair to the arm. Ouch!

Another HBK. SCM to Cade!

Jericho’s laid out on the top rope…chair to the head…and Jericho goes crashing into that table!

Jericho is now getting beaten down with the chair. Some pretty great screaming from Jericho here.

HBK elbowdrops Cade and Jericho though the Announcer’s Table!

Now HBK is whipping Jericho with a leather belt. He actually whips him in the eye once, which looks brutal.

Now HBK is beating Jericho with the metal part of the belt. Again, pretty brutal beatdown.

Shawn Michaels defeats Chris Jericho via stoppage at 26:53. Referee calls it as HBK keeps beating down on Jericho. HBK keeps going, and HBK superkicks the ref. I actually….don’t think this match is that good. It had the feel of a feud ender, which it wasn’t. It didn’t click for me until the part when HBK sent Jericho through the table…and even then it became overkill later.

I think this is because super emotional HBK just isn’t natural for him. It’s not the best HBK. The only time it really worked for me is against Ric Flair at Wrestlemania XXIV.

This result also hurts the very end of this PPV…which we’ll get to.

Rhodes, Dibiase and Manu talk to Randy Orton (why is he here?) Apparently Orton still isn’t impressed with them…since beating Cryme Tyme isn’t a big deal. He’s not wrong to be fair.

WWE Championship Scramble
Triple H© vs. Jeff Hardy vs. The Brian Kendrick vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP

Jeff Hardy is #1! How unlucky for the Hardyz that they each drew #1. Then again…Matt won earlier.

JR and Taz go over the rules of the Scramble Match. Uh…we had one earlier tonight you know.

#2 is Shelton Benjamin! This is Gold Standard Shelton.

Benjamin counters a kick with powerbomb in the corner. Unexpected but cool.

#3 is THE…BRIAN…KENDRICK! THE MAN WITH A PLAN.

Hardy pins Kendrick to become the interim champ!

The KENDRICK! Kendrick pins Jeff to become interim champ!

It’s MVP at #4! The Game gets 5 minutes of work in tonight I see….

Nice super dropkick from Kendrick! Knocked MVP right out.

Kendrick was great in this gimmick. Too bad he couldn’t stop smoking weed.

It’s something seeing MVP, Benjamin and Kendrick in the ring wrestling for the WWE Title.

Here comes the Game! Can he unseat THE BRIAN KENDRICK?!

Pedigree to Kendrick. HHH is interim champ. That was fast.

Twist of Fate! Jeff Hardy controls the title! 3 minutes to go!

HHH pedigrees Kendrick again…and pins him again. HHH is champ again!

Swanton to Kendrick! Jeff Hardy is champ again! 90 seconds to go!

We get the powerbomb-superplex spot from MVP, Benjamin and Kendrick!

30 seconds, can Jeff hold on?!

Triple H retains the WWE title in 20:16. Jeff takes out everyone but HHH…but HHH pedigrees MVP at the last moment and pins him. Finish is botched a bit…as Jeff clearly could have broken up the pin…but instead tried to pin Shelton. It’s a good match though, as it continually pushed Jeff Hardy as someone who keeps getting so close…but whose moment seems inevitable. Also, Kendrick, MVP and Shelton had some good moments.

HBK interview! Still looks upset. HBK is happy that for the first time in months, he doesn’t have to go to a hospital after a PPV. He’s content with how tonight went down. Not satisfied though.

CM Punk interview! Orton interrupts. Rhodes, Manu and Dibiase attack Punk! Kofi Kingston tries to help, but gets beat down as well. Orton then punts Punk in the head! Orton is impressed now with Rhodes, Dibiase and Manu.

Michael Cole talks about what that means for the Scramble Match later. I’ll talk later about why this sucks, but it sucks.

Diva’s Championship
Michelle McCool© vs. Maryse

I miss both of these Divas.

Taz talks about how Maryse and McCool have totally opposite personalities, that McCool is humble etc. Kind of funny considering Lay-Cool later.

Michelle just kicks Maryse right in the face.

Pretty messed up sunset flip, but Michelle saves it with a dropkick to the face.

I don’t remember McCool’s offense being all kick based.

Michelle McCool pins Maryse and retains the title in 5:42. Face-buster (I wanna say it was called the Wings of Love or something) for the pin. Pretty well wrestled Diva’s match I must say.

Ok, so a couple of times JR has talked about a poll about whether Vickie Guerrero should have allowed Big Show in the WWE Title Scramble. 77% said yes. I wouldn’t have mentioned it, but there’s apparently an angle later.

Raw GM Mike Adamle states that CM Punk will probably not be able to compete. I get putting over Orton’s punt, but it’s a little bs…which I will explain why later.

Here comes the Big Show.

Big Show suggests that Adamle should enter him in the World Title Scramble. You know…that actually makes sense compared to who was actually picked. Why not the Big Show?

Here comes a Guerrero move talented than Chavo…Vickie!

She’s mad that Big Show is causing a disruption. She called him a big dumb Giant!

Um…we get some druids. This took a weird turn.

Big Show’s cracking up. I admit that’s pretty funny.

Druids are bringing out a casket.

Undertaker on the titantron!

Taker offers her the chance to go into the coffin herself. Or he’ll come down there and put her in there himself. Obvious heel turn coming up.

GONG! Here comes the Undertaker!

For the record the history here is Taker beat Edge at Summerslam inside Hell in a Cell. And Taker and Vickie had problems as a result. Something like that.

Vickie tries to run, but Big Show holds her so she can’t.

Taker grabs Vickie…and Show punches Taker!

Big Show beats the crap out of The Undertaker. This would set up a Casket Match at Survivor Series.

That was a pretty boring beatdown to be honest. We couldn’t we do this on TV?

We recap the recent history with Orton and Punk.

William Regal thinks he would be a great candidate to replace CM Punk if needed. I agree!

World Heavyweight Championship Scramble
CM Punk© (Maybe) vs. Kane vs. JBL vs. Batista vs. Rey Mysterio

Batista is #1!

Let’s go over the Scramble rules again!

#2 is a WRESTLING GOD….JBL!

Figure Four by Batista on JBL. How unexpected…although he’s obviously honoring Flair.

#3 is KANE!

It’s all Kane vs. Batista. JBL is on the outside or something.

Interesting that the three big men were the first three in.

Chokeslam to JBL! Kane gets the pin and is the interim champion!

#4 is Rey Mysterio. We get some drama…will CM Punk make it for #5?

Mysterio has some mohawk thing going on. Looks out of place.

Rey and Batista work together to hurt Kane! That was something else that replaced the original Eddie Guerrero and Batista friendship angle back in 2005.

#5 is….Chris Jericho! I guess he wasn’t beaten down that badly afterall?

Jericho is still selling the injuries from earlier.

Kane’s still champ right now. Can he hold on?

Michael Cole points out that Jericho doesn’t seem fit to be in this match in the first place. That’s a great point Michael Cole.

Three minutes left…can Kane hang on?

Why does Kane go for covers? Lawler correctly points out that it changes nothing.

A minute left, but Batista is beating up Kane!

Spinebuster! Batista gets the pin! Batista is champ with 30 seconds left!

Here comes Rey…Batista counters him with a powerbomb…but Jericho covers Kane…1…2…3! Batista should have just pinned Rey…he had 6 seconds left.

Chris Jericho wins the World Heavyweight Championship in 17:15. Match was just plodding along to be honest, I can’t remember a meaningful spot or moment until Jericho shows up…and Jericho does nothing in route to winning the title.

Ok, let’s talk about this whole CM Punk thing. It makes little to no sense backstage wise, and storyline wise it’s okay except for one thing.

Backstage wise, according to the CM Punk documentary, the Jericho-HBK feud needed the title. They did a ladder match at No Mercy, do I get that. Fine. BUT…Jericho and Punk have a steel cage match a couple of weeks later for the title which Jericho won. So…why couldn’t Punk just drop the title there? I don’t know. Somehow Punk just giving up a chance to defend the title made more sense. It doesn’t, but that’s what we got. Pretty ass backward thinking there.

Storyline wise it could have worked…except Chris Jericho should be in a lot…A LOT…worse condition than CM Punk was in. I get the punt was being put over as death. But Chris Jericho was beaten down, but through two tables, helped out of the ring, etc. etc. I get that Mike Adamle was supposed to be dumb or something…but that was really dumb. Big Show, William Regal ,heck, even Randy Orton made more sense! Even if Orton was still “injured”…he was in better shape than Jericho!

Let’s talk the concept of the Scramble Match. It worked out well in the ECW Title match…but Jeff Hardy not breaking up the pin in the Smackdown one is pretty dumb. Why are you going for a pin? You were the interim champion!

In the RAW one…Chris Jericho did nothing. He took a spear, then did nothing and covered Kane. If your match is designed in a way where an injured broken down wrestler can just sneak in and get a pin without the element of surprise (like MITB would have) and win the World Title, I’m sorry, but that doesn’t really work for me.

There has only been one more Scramble Match in WWE history I believe, in 2009. While I think you can make the concept work, it needs to be booked better overall.

I don’t think this is a bad PPV, but it just has a lot of mishaps overall. Nothing really clicked (although I liked the Smackdown title Scramble a lot). The angles seemed more important than the matches (Legacy, Punk going down, Taker-Show), and HBK vs. Jericho didn’t feel right at all.

In the grand scheme of things though, irrelevant. WWE storylines would keep going as they always did.

Final Grade: C

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews WWECW One Night Stand II

ECWonenightstand2006

ECW One Night Stand 2006
June 11, 2006
New York, NY
Reviewed on March 4, 2014

Background: I don’t remember when it was decided that WWE would add a third brand, the ECW brand, but I remember being shocked about it. This was a huge deal. The revival of ECW! And it’s going to have all of the classic ECW guys like RVD and Sabu! And you know what, it really looked like WWE wasn’t going to mess this one up. The Rise and Fall of ECW was a great documentary. One Night Stand 2005 was one of the greatest PPVs ever (or…at least a great PPV) and actually sold quite well. The money would practically print itself. Sigh.

One Night Stand 2006 was the launching pad for the ECW brand. This show was more of a new start than a reunion show. Some storylines focused on ECW stealing some RAW and Smackdown talent. Kurt Angle and The Big Show would both become ECW talents. Also, both Sabu and RVD had shots at the World Heavyweight and WWE titles respectively. Anything could happen at this PPV…and surely, anything will. People were legitimately excited for this prospect.

The Card

The crowd is electric early on! ECW! ECW! ECW!

Yeah, that was the first line of the ONS2005 review. Well, that’s just what ECW fans do!

“If Cena Wins, We Riot.” The classic sign.

Paul Heyman’s out first. This ain’t Raw. This ain’t Smackdown…this ain’t even WWE!

Heyman thanks the fans. I’m sure he means it.

It’s a pretty awesome promo. Paul Heyman is one of the best promo men in wrestling history.

Taz vs. Jerry Lawler

This began with the Joey Styles worked shoot and Lawler slapping him in the fact. Lawler was the perfect ECW heel, he basically just played it like he did in 1997.

Taz makes Jerry Lawler pass out in 0:35. Lawler slaps Styles on the way to the ring. Styles jumps on his back. When Lawler fends him off and sets him up for the piledriver, Taz locks him in the Tazmission for the win. Fun way to start the show, good way for Lawler to get his comeuppance.

Taz joins Styles on commentary. Sorry, but Taz is not as good as Mick Foley.

WWE vs. ECW recap video. Highlights Big Show’s ECW turn. And the John Cena vs. Sabu match.

Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton

There’s history here. These two were part of the World Heavyweight Title match at Mania 22, and Angle snapped Orton’s ankle later (or, wellness strike #1).

One of the best things Orton has ever done is use pyro as heel heat.

Kurt Angle’s theme is a bit remixed to drown out any YOU SUCK chants.

What a difference a year makes. Fans are all for Angle here. This time last year they were telling him that he sucked dick.

Great chants here. “Angle’s gonna kill you” and a break his ankle chant.

This match is purely used to put Angle over as a shoot wrestling killer. Just like the original Taz.

This match can be described as Kurt Angle making Randy Orton his bitch. There’s a beautiful spot where Angle traps Orton with his legs then just slaps the back of his head a few times.

Orton finally gets some offense in…but you just know he’s getting killed soon.

Pretty sure Angle stole the triple German from Benoit.

Kurt Angle makes Randy Orton submit in 15:07. Orton goes for a RKO but Angle counters by just shoving Orton hard to the mat. Angle goes for the Angle Lock, but Orton rolls him up for 2. Angle gets the Angle Lock and grapevines the leg for the win. Good match to make Angle look like a bad ass. It’s a shame his WWE days were numbered. I do think Orton gets a little too much offense in at the end, but it works. Don’t worry Orton fans, he gets his return win at Vengeance.

The FBI (Little Guido and Tony Mamaluke) vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri and Super Crazy

I laughed about this match, simply because it’s basically the same match from last One Night Stand. That match was damn good though.

Big Guido is the only FBI member back from last year.

Tajiri just comes all nonchalant and breaks up a submission by kicking the hell out of Mamaluke.

This is a very different match than last year’s international three way dance. A lot of technical wrestling from Tony Mamaluke.

Admittedly, the commentary taking shots at Smackdown is a little annoying.

Double Tree of Woe! Stereo dropkicks to the face!

Super Crazy hits a springboard Asai Moonsault to the FBI to the outside…and lands on his feet!

Big Guido beats up Crazy.

Super Crazy I think botches a backdrop or a flapjack, that could have been bad but he gets away with it.

Camel Clutch on Crazy and a second rope dropkick from Guido!

Tajiri with an Octopus Hold! Awesome.

Double Tarantula!

They chop down Big Guido!

The FBI win when they pin Tajiri in 12:24. Little Guido hits this brutal dropkick on an inverted Super Crazy to get rid of him, then the FBI hit a double brainbuster for the win. Very fun match. Not quite as good as last year’s, but that’s not fair at all.

Here comes the Big Show! He takes out everyone…and hits Tony Mamaluke with a Cobra Clutch Backbreaker! What happened to that move? It was sick!

It’s JBL!

He shoots on what he did to The Blue Meanie last year. Which was pretty fucked up at the time to be fair.

He points out that RVD, Big Show and Kurt Angle are stars because of Vince McMahon. He’s mostly correct on that.

JBL makes fun of ScyFy. Thanks to Taz leaving Smackdown, JBL is now the voice of Smackdown!

He calls ECW the minor league. To be fair, he’s not wrong.

I like JBL…but that really wasn’t necessary.

World Heavyweight Championship
Rey Mysterio© vs. Sabu

Admittedly don’t understand why Sabu got a shot at the title here. RVD had to use Money in the Bank afterall.

Sabu has weird fuzzy pants.

No baggy pants for Rey this time. He should have swapped attires in regards to his ONS choices.

Dueling chairs to start!

There’s something wrong with Nick Patrick being the referee in an ECW show.

Oh, no dueling chairs afterall.

Dueling chairs!

Air Sabu early!

Air Mysterio! Pretty nice hurricanrana there.

Pretty sure Sabu gave Rey a concussion with that chair throw there.

Perfect top rope moonsault from Rey!

Rey drives Sabu through a table! Sabu looked like he hurt his throat there.

Great sequence of missed flips and stuff. Hard to explain but it works.

Triple Jump Moonsault…I think Sabu legit hurts Rey there though.

My god that had to be a concussion. Holy shit. What a chair to the head.

Sabu and Rey Mysterio wrestle to a no contest in 9:10. Springboard into a DDT through the table! Oddly some guy in a tux who’s a doctor is out and says it’s over, neither can fight anymore. It’s a very weak finish that at the time maybe was creating a no violence NY State Wrestling Commission character, but it didn’t work. But the match up until the actual finish is great.

Mick Foley, Edge and Lita vs. Beulah, Tommy Dreamer and Terry Funk

Reading Mick Foley’s Hardcore Diaries really gave a lot of insight into this match and how frustrating it was for Foley specifically. Vince had no hope of this match being any good. It almost became an eight man tag.

Foley turned heel here and went with the “I once was a part of ECW, but I became a bigger star in WWE” route. Mick does the classic “You’re right, I sold out…..I sold out Madison Square Garden etc.” Just classic.

He brings up that he once loved ECW….when it was owned by Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley! Long live the Alliance! What an awesome line that is.

Edge is great here too. “This is their Christmas, only their Santa Claus is Jewish, fat, bald and gives out an endless supply of bullshit”

Lita’s mic skills were never good.

This match is originally just a tag without the women, but Beulah knows about Lita’s fondess for threesomes…so six person tag it is.

Man Terry Funk makes slaps even look good.

It doesn’t take long for the weapons to come out.

Edge gets hip tossed on a ladder!

Spinning ladder!

Edge sends Terry Funk crashing down as he climbed a ladder. Funk was 61 years old here.

Barbed Wire board!

They suplex the board on Dreamer! Dreamer went through so much in these ECW PPVs. Makes you feel worse when you remember he jobbed to Daivari 6 months later.

Fans want fire. Sick bastards.

Foley in the wire! Jeez.

Funk takes the board to the face! They’re all sick.

Foley punches Funk in the face with barbed wire on his arm….then Foley tries to take out the eye!

Funk keeps yelling “My eye! My eye!” Most amazing seller in the business here.

Funk gets taken to the back.

Poor Dreamer. Poor poor Dreamer.

Socko!

Socko to Beulah!

Edge is about to have his way with Beulah….but here comes Funk with a 2×4 with barbed wire on it!

Funk owns them all.

The 2×4 is on fire! Fire to Foley! Foley’s on fire! Foley through the barbed wire board! Oh My God!

Edge sends Funk into Foley….their night is over.

Dreamer accidentally chokes Edge out for real here with the barbed wire, which I think Lita knew. Beulah takes her down…catfight!

Death Valley Driver to Lita!

Educator with the wire to Dreamer!

Edge, Mick Foley and Lita win when Edge pins Beulah in 18:45. Edge spears Beulah! Great facial expression from Beulah. Edge gets the win with the most provocative cover in wrestling history. Violent match. Great match. Watching Funk try to get out of the wire is something else.

There’s John Cena in the back, thinking about the match!
There’s Rob Van Dam in the back thinking about the match!

Masato Tanaka vs. Balls Mahoney

A lot of wrestling early on. Which isn’t the way to go with Mahoney ever.

This match is to put over Balls I guess.

Crowd is into it, which helps.

I did like how Balls would use people’s beers as a weapon.

Balls Mahoney pinned Masato Tanaka in 5:03. Dueling chairs! Tanaka gets the advantage but misses the chair shot. Mahoney nails his chair shot and dents the chair! 1…2…3! The first okay match of all the One Night Stands. It was to put Balls over, and it did.

We get the RVD vs. Cena video. I’ll get to this match in a sec….

Here comes Eugene!

As Eugene’s uncle Eric Bischoff once said, Eugene is as smart as a ECW fan!

Are you saying boo…or U for Eugene! BOOOO! Thanks everybody!

Eugene has a poem for us!

ECW’s the place to be.
I love Terry Funk and RVD.

Stevie Richards makes me cowl.
I take a bath and use Taz’s towel.

ECW is not phony.
I want to hug Balls Mahoney.

I want to hug all of you.
I want to picnic with Sabu!

I have to say….Sandman’s entrance isn’t the same without Enter Sandman.

Sandman is in amazing shape compared to last year.

Eugene goes for the hug…then gets the everliving shit caned out of him.

WWE Championship
John Cena© vs. Rob Van Dam

RVD won the 2nd ever Money in the Bank and decided to cash it in at One Night Stand. Makes perfect sense. For a while, RVD was the only one to cash in the briefcase in an actual match.

This match is actually the Dr. J to Cena vs. Punk at MITB 2011’s Michael Jordan.

I actually have a lot of respect for Cena here. If he had actually won he might have not left alive…and really dealt with the boos well.

Cena tries to throw his gear into the crowd and the crowd keeps throwing it back.

It’s pretty cool how RVD just absolutely owns the arena.

Here comes the toilet paper!

Early on they do a bunch of things to play to the crowd (the boo-yay-boo-yay sequence).

ECW fans are hypocrites. They chant “same old shit” to Cena…but RVD’s been doing the same old shit longer than Cena has.

RVD with a moonsault off the stairs!

RVD’s corkscrew legdrop with his opponent lying on the railing was always a great spot.

Rolling Thunder on a chair!

Split Legged Moonsault on a chair…but Cena gets the chair up!

Cena uses the ropes like a heel, nice!

Cena sends RVD head first into a chair in the corner!

Cena with the Five Knuckle Shuffle! He then plays to the crowd. Cena can be a great heel sometimes.

Pretty sure RVD botches putting Cena on the top rope…but the crowd chants “Cena fucked up”. Nice.

Table propped in the corner!

The STFU!

Love Cena not breaking the hold after RVD got to the ropes.

Cena takes out the ref!

Rob Van Dam wins the WWE…now ECW Title when he pins John Cena in 20:41. Cena sends RVD to the outside. A guy in riot gear comes in and spears Cena through the propped table! I assume that was done to make it seem like it’s Rhyno…but it turns out to be Edge. RVD hits a Five Star and Heyman runs in to make a three count which did feel kinda odd. Taz makes a horrible call on commentary (Ok, I guess!). Match is good. It is clear that RVD isn’t the RVD of old though. RVD celebrates with the new WWECW!

This show was classic ECW’s last great moment. It’s hard to pinpoint the blame of WWECW’s demise. Was it when ScyFy demanded things like The Zombie? Was it the first ECW show that was just in a normal arena? Was it because Kurt Angle was gone a few weeks later? Was it when RVD and Sabu got caught smoking pot and Big Show became champion? Was it when Batista and Big Show headlined an ECW show? What about when Undertaker did one?

Rob Van Dam winning the classic ECW Title is a moment I’ll never forget. It’s too bad that everything went downhill from that point forward. I believe at this point the next year Vince was ECW World Champion. Just wow.

But this show, while not the first One Night Stand, was still a good and fun show. Almost everything hit, and even the things that didn’t weren’t horrible or even bad.

Final Grade: A-

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews Wrestlemania XXII

WrestleMania22

WWE Wrestlemania 22
April 2, 2006
Chicago (Rosemont), IL
Reviewed on March 7, 2014

Background: We are well into the John Cena era, and there have been some recent bumps along the way. Cena was a very popular WWE Champion for about three months….and then went up against workrate favorites Chris Jericho and Kurt Angle and lost his babyface steam. Amazingly, Cena would actually never regain that babyface steam, constantly being booed for the next eight years. The John Cena character is one of the weirdest ones in WWE history when you think about it.

There was a small hiccup in the Cena reign though as Edge cashed in the first Money in the Bank and held the title for a few months. Batista, someone else who’s been the face of the WWE for the last year, got injured. Kurt Angle made a surprise move to Smackdown and won the World Title, trigging a short but exciting time for WWE in general. Edge and Angle as champs were more interesting than Batista and Cena for sure. Have no fear Cena and Batista fans though…these two would be at the very top for the next five years…and even eight years from the event as well.

Also, it is worth pointing out that Eddie Guerrero passed away five months prior. One of the major storylines revolved around Eddie Guerrero’s death, which involved Randy Orton being an outright dick and Rey Mysterio shocking everyone in winning the Royal Rumble.

The Card

This is the last Wrestlemania that was held in an arena I believe. It’s been a three year streak (Mania XX at MSG, XXI at Staples).

World Tag Team Championship
Big Show and Kane© vs. Carlito and Chris Masters

The only small story here is that Carlito and Masters have had some recent issues getting along.

It’s interesting that Chris Masters got a push when he wasn’t good, but when he was improving in 2011 he got released.

Kane with a flying clothesline from the top to the outside. Probably the best spot we’ll get in this one.

Carlito and Masters with a double flapjack on the Big Show. What strength!

Kane and Big Show retain when Kane pinned Carlito in 6:01. Masters accidentally hits Carlito, and Kane gets the chokeslam. Masters an Carlito argue afterwards. Match was 80% Kane and Big Show. This would be the end of the Chris Masters run for the most part, and the idea that Carlito could be a top guy didn’t make it to 2007. I guess this was okay, not really the hot opener Wrestlemania needs.

The Coach interviews Shawn Michaels. Did Coach turn face at some point? He was a heel in late 05.

Money in the Bank
Bobby Lashley vs. Ric Flair vs. Matt Hardy vs. Finlay vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Shelton Benjamin

Only Shelton returns from last year. This is an odd group to be honest. Lashley, Finlay and Flair?

Finlay was such a random comeback in 2006. His run was enjoyable though.

Fans hot for RVD.

RVD with an over the top rope dive onto Matt Hardy, who was holding a ladder. Lawler points out that was a stupid move. I agree, it probably hurt RVD more.

Benjamin sets the ladder up as a stairway up the ropes….then does a running Senton onto Lashley, RVD and Hardy. Nice! Benjamin made a star out of himself at Mania XXI’s MITB.

Matt Hardy superplexes the 57 year old Ric Flair off the top of the ladder…which leads to Flair screaming in pain. Refs throw up the x, but I think that’s a work.

RVD misses a Rolling Thunder on the ladder. Ouch.

Benjamin with an awesome sunset flip powerbomb attempt off the ladder to Lashley…only he needed two others to finish the powerbomb.

Flair makes his way back! WOOO!

Flair takes ANOTHER top of the ladder bump when Finlay hits him with his club. Flair is so sick.

RVD knocks Lashley off with a dropkick/chair combo! Not sure if that’s called the Van Daminator in that case.

RVD with a top rope splash off a ladder to Finlay. ECW! ECW! Amazing that a year 2006 turns out to be for ECW.

RVD is about to win before Benjamin goes all Spider-Man.

Rob Van Dam wins in 12:14. Benjamin and Matt Hardy fight on a ladder next to RVD’s, and RVD kicks the ladder away. I think Benjamin is supposed to straddle the top rope but misses. RVD then grabs the case. While this is a fun match, it’s arguably the weakest Money in the Bank Match. It was too short, and outside of Shelton Benjamin, lacking any creativity. Lashley and Finlay seemed miscast.

Randy Orton interrupts Hall of Famer Mean Gene Okerlund! The injured Batista interrupts Orton, tells him he’s going to win the belt when he comes back. Funny, these could be considered shots fired to set up Wrestlemania eight years later!
Hall of Fame. There is a nice trolling line from Howard Finkel. “Ladies and Gentlemen Hall of Famer Bret “The Hitman” Hart….was not comfortable in participating in this evening’s event. Awesome Fink.

Okerlund, Sherri, Tony Atlas, Verne Gagne, William “The Fridge” Perry, The Blackjacks.

And Eddie Guerrero. Huge cheers here. And rightfully so.

WWE United States Championship
Chris Benoit© vs. JBL

Story: Benoit apparently broke JBL’s hand in the past…but it is healed now.

Cole says that JBL bragged about beating Eddie at GAB 04, so if he beats Benoit here, in his mind he becomes the greatest technical wrestler ever. Tazz says that remains to be seen. Um…no it doesn’t. Not at all.

This is going to be a stiff one.

Benoit tried to be JBL the same way he beat Orlando Jordan….with the Crossface in 30 seconds.

JBL has never been in the greatest shape…but he’s clearly not in good shape here.

This match has absolutely no flow. I know it may be easy to blame JBL here, but I do think Benoit might have just given up at this point as well. Probably 75 on JBL, 25 on Benoit.

Eddie starts mocking Eddie Guerrero. I didn’t think the Rey stuff was in bad taste…but JBL doing it here? That’s bad taste.

JBL won’t stop with the Eddie stuff.

JBL now doing a very slow Three Amigos. Awful.

Benoit later does the Three Amigos. Benoit is the best friend of Guerrero, and he’s the face. That’s why it’s better there.

JBL wins the title when he pinned Benoit in 9:48. Benoit locks in the Crossface and JBL easily rolls into an advantageous pin combo for the win. He also used the ropes. Finish was okay I guess, but the match didn’t flow and had some bad moments. One of the worst Benoit matches I’d ever seen.

Hardcore Match
Mick Foley vs. Edge

Apparently Foley was a ref in a Cena-Edge title match, and Edge blamed Foley for the loss. Edge is also disgusted that Foley went from Hardcore Legend to a human muppet.

Joey Styles gets to call this match! He’s about to lose his Wrestlemania virginity!

Foley looks really fat coming out…but that’s actually intentional.

Brutal cookie sheet shots. Jeez.

Baseball slide dropkicks a sign into Foley’s face!

Spear….but Edge is hurt? Foley was wearing another shirt…and underneath was barbed wire!

Edge’s arm is bleeding.

Foley starts whipping Edge is the wire. It looks sicker than it sounds. And it sounds sick.

Lita saves Edge from Barbie by jumping on Foley’s back, but then Foley has the sick idea to do a Cactus Clothesline with Lita on him! Great spot.

Wow Edge just slams Foley hard on the steel ramp. That hurt me.

Edge douses Foley in lighter fluid. My god.

Foley is about to con-chair-to (with a pan and a chair) on Edge but Lita tries to make the save. Foley looks downright frightening and Lita sells is great when Foley threatens to hit her with the chair.

Edge with a perfect shot to Foley’s head with Barbie…Foley’s busted.

Edge actually brings in the thumbtacks!

Foley counters Edge and makes Edge a human pin cushion. Oh My God!

Barbed Wire Socko!

Lita gets Barbed Wire Socko was well!

You have to give Edge a lot of credit here. He didn’t wear a shirt for all of this violence. I’m sure he still has scars.

Edge pinned Mick Foley in 14:36. Foley pours lighter fluid on the table…but Lita hits him with Barbie! Lita lights the table on fire….and EDGE SPEARS HIM THROUGH THE 2ND ROPE THROUGH THE FLAMING TABLE. What a sick fuck. Edge should have just been handed his Hall of Fame Ring right there. Edge gets the pin on the floor. I’d have to double check, but I’m pretty sure this was my 2006 Match of the Year. This also provided a great backdrop to the One Night Stand 06 six person tag.

Incredible match, and it made up for what had been a lackluster show so far.

At first I thought Edge was just selling the fire brilliantly, then I realized he probably just burned himself instead. What a sick match.

Booker T goes through a hallway of freaks…Pirate Paul Burchill, Gene Snitsky, Ted Dibiase, Eugene, Mae Young and Goldust in a dress (Oprah-dust). Funny segment…even if the Snitsky-Young part is a little too much (He’s licking her foot).

Dibiase with some epic laughing at the end.

Handicap Match
Booker T and Queen Sharmell vs. The Boogeyman

Can this match follow Edge vs. Foley?!?

I liked the Boogeyman character. I liked the theme song. I liked the entrance.

I hated Boogeyman wrestling.

Haha Booker tries to have Sharmell start the match. Awesome.

It was a trap! A funny one though.

Booker is owning early. Boogeyman does sell the side kick brilliantly to be fair.

Boogeyman is doing the Boogeyman version of the Hulk Up!

Book-End!

Boogeyman kicks out!

Boogeyman offense looks uncoordinated.

OMG THE WORMS!

He ATE THE WORMS!

The Boogeyman pins Booker T in 3:43. Boogeyman kisses Sharmell with the worms…then chokebombs Booker T for the win. This was pretty bad…although it should have been a lot worse. What the fuck did Booker T do to deserve this for Wrestlemania? Amazingly, King Booker would be World Champion four months later.

Probably the best booked Women’s Title feud ever coming up.

Women’s Championship
Trish Stratus© vs. Mickie James

Story: Mickie James is Trish Stratu’s stalker. It started off as her biggest fan…and turned into being sexually attracted to her. It’s not just the storyline that’s great…but how convincing Mickie is in the role. No idea what happened to Mickie afterwards as I don’t remember a thing until Piggy James four years later.

Jim Ross takes a random shot at Lawler…telling him Mickie may be too old for her because she is in her early 20s.

I do believe there is a taunt from Mickie edited out of the WWE Network version of this….which is Mickie air licking a V made by her hands. You figure it out.

Trish with some really hard chops.

Blocked kick turns into a split from Mickie. Nice.

Trish dropkicks Mickie from the ring. Hard to explain, but it was a cooler than the standard dropkick.

Trish Chick Kick’s the ring post. Creative spots here.

Mickie DDT’s the ankle. Just tons of creativity.

Crowd is very hot for Mickie James. They actually boo Trish Stratus.

Mickie really works on the leg.

Fantastic head scissors by Trish with her legs crossed. Horrible fans for booing that.

Mickie counters the Trish corner handstand and starts shrieking like a maniac. Amazing.

Running powerbomb by Trish…but Mickie showed excitement when her legs were wrapped around Trish’s head. Amazing telling of the story.

Mickie counters the Stratusfaction by grabbing Trish’s crotch. Just wow.

Mickie James wins the Women’s Title when she pinned Trish at 8:48. The match is just amazing…but unfortunately Mickie’s Stratusfaction attempt is horribly botched. The WWE Network cuts out the botch…but I remember it clearly. Mickie tries to save it with a Chick Kick, but that hurt the match a lot. Still a very good match.

I forgot that all the McMahon’s, even Linda, were heels here. Time for a McMahon family prayer!

“God, let’s face it, I don’t like you, and you don’t like me.” And it only gets better. Sure maybe mocking God is in bad taste, but I do find it funny here.

Casket Match
The Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

This was before Henry’s 2008 emergence as a legit bad ass. In 2006, he still kinda sucked.

Henry has the very underrated “Echo” as his theme music. It’s pretty awesome.

Taker had just morphed into Match of the Year Taker as he had a match of the Year Candidate at No Way Out a month prior against Kurt Angle.

Just wondering, why didn’t we get Angle vs. Taker here and Orton vs. Rey for the Title?

Match is being built as Mark Henry being an immovable object. I get it, but it doesn’t really work here as the Undertaker should be able to take down Mark Henry here.

Old School! Nope, Henry ruined it.

Taker gets it on the 2nd attempt.

Taker hasn’t knocked Mark Henry down yet. See, it just doesn’t seem that believable.

World Strongest Slam! Cover! Mark eventually figures out there are no pins in a Casket Match.

Taker does the Samoan Headbutt spot with Henry.

Taker powerbombs Henry out of the corner. He finally knocked Henry down!

Undertaker busts out the over the top rope dive to Henry! He outright clears the casket too!

Undertaker wins in 9:28. Tombstone then Henry is rolled into the Casket. Match is a lot worse than I remember it…but Taker saves it a little with the over the top rope dive. Sometimes it is the moment that matters.

No Holds Barred
Shawn Michaels vs. Mr. McMahon

Story here: McMahon gives the fans what he wants. HBK gives the fans what the fans want. Vince is looking to screw HBK worse than he screwed Bret.

Vince has a poster of him on Fitness Magazine at ringside.

Shawn smashes the poster over Vince’s head. Pretty funny.

Shawn dominated the beginning…but here comes The Spirit Squad!

This is Dolph Ziggler’s Wrestlemania debut everybody!

HBK takes out the Squad.

Vince has control thanks to the Squad. For the record this is how Vince should be booked. He’s not a wrestler, so he should need help to get advantages.

Vince is mocking Bret Hart here.

Now he’s loading up for Sweet Chin Music!

Shawn blocks!

Michaels’ regains control and hits his spots. Very nice elbow from the top. So now that he’s in control, you know what that means? It means Shane McMahon is here! Kendo stick shot to Michaels!

Shane’s got handcuffs!

Vince is taking off his pants. Kiss My Ass Club time!

Shawn counters…and Shane joins the club.

Shawn handcuffs Shane to the outside of the ring. Shawn mocks Shane’s taunt…then beats the crap out of him with the kendo stick. Crowd gets into it.

Absolutely brutal chairshot to the head of Vince. You will not see shots like that ever again.

Ladder shot to the head of Vince!

Garbage Can shot to the head of Vince! I’m starting to feel bad for Vince.

Shawn Michaels pins Mr. McMahon in 18:22. Shawn gets a huge ladder and sets Vince up in the center of the ring on a table. You can see Shane holding down the ladder on the outside. Vince is on the table in a garbage can. We get the DX sign. Huge elbow drop through Vince and the table! Shawn makes sure to get Sweet Chin Music in for the win. I mean this is a good match overall I think. I do think it is a bit much at the end when beats the crap out of McMahon. Weird as it sounds, but this match is the violent version of Bret vs. Vince four years later. It never looked like Vince was the better wrestler, which is good. Also, the moment is once again really good. Also, bonus points for Vince flipping Michaels off while being stretchered away. Also good DX foreshadowing.

World Heavyweight Championship
Kurt Angle© vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Randy Orton

Angle had absolutely taken out the comedy portion of his character at this point. It’s a shame we didn’t see an extended WWE run of this Angle.

Of course, the exploitation of Eddie Guerrero’s death is all over this, and while it’s a bit much, I do think it’s okay. Like I am okay with Rey doing Eddie stuff. But not when Orton says Eddie is in hell.

I totally forgot how lame it was to get Orton and Rey in the match. Teddy Long just re-adds Rey back in after Orton beat him at No Way Out.

POD Live for Rey. Rey looks like a mini-Tatanka with his entrance attire.

Angle’s pyro is pretty incredible.

Orton with a great start, takes the WHC belt from the ref and nails Angle.

Angle does a double German suplex to Orton and Rey…and Rey goes flying!

These three do a lot of really fun spots, like Angle sending Rey into Orton, who was on the top rope…and Rey finishing with a hurricanrana.

Let’s Go Angle. Shame fans aren’t more into Rey. Another reason they should have went with Taker vs. Angle and Rey vs. Orton.

Angle counters the 619 with an Ankle Lock! Rey taps, but Orton distracts the ref.

Angle is just destroying everyone with germans. Poor Rey landed on his face. And he got Angle Slammed over the top rope.

Now Orton taps….but the ref was distracted by Rey. Really protecting Angle here, and actually, I’m okay with that.

Angle kicks out of a RKO!

Rey tries a 619 using the ringpost, but he loses grip. Unfortunate botch there.

Orton does this gutwrench neckbreaker. Why doesn’t he bring that back?

Orton survives an Angle Slam.

Rey Mysterio wins the World Title when he pins Orton in 9:19. Rey counters an Angle Lock into an armdrag that sends Angle out. 619 and Springboard Hurricanrana to Orton for the win. Match had good moments, but it was underwhelming. This was supposed to be Rey’s big moment, but all we got was a 9 minute match that Kurt Angle dominated anyway. The moves were really good though. Angle was the man. Don’t remember Rey being booed like that in favor of Angle though.

Rey winning is a good moment though. I never thought Rey Mysterio would win a world championship. He ended up with three.

JR is hyping up HHH vs. Cena. Video of Cena got booed. I think JR has forgotten about the Pillow Fight.

Playboy Pillow Fight
Torrie Wilson vs. Candace Michelle

I think Torrie’s theme is dubbed…as this is the Laycool theme playing. Maybe I don’t remember correctly and she had this though.

Candace is hot. Torrie is hot. That’s the whole match.

Looking it up, it looks like Torrie had the Laycool theme before Laycool. How about that.

Candance does get this one cool leg choke that’s where she handstands on the apron.

Torrie Wilson pins Candace Michelle in 3:54. A little too long for my tastes, but it was great to look at for sure.

WWE Championship
John Cena© vs. Triple H

Story here is that HHH thinks Cena is a second rate champion. I normally don’t like that narrative as it usually diminishes the title, but it works here as Cena kinda was that as he won the title on Smackdown.

New HHH music. Behold the King…the King of Kings!

Triple H’s entrance is ridiculous. He looks like a 2nd rate Conan the Barbarian.

JR brings up that this was HHH’s 11th straight Mania, and the record was set by Bret with 12. HHH wouldn’t get there, as he missed Mania 23 with an injury.

Cena’s is a bit funny (it also described the 1 vs 99% thing) although just as ridiculous with the 20’s gangster feel. But now, the most important part of the show.

CM Punk was in the main event of Wrestlemania!!!! He’s hanging on the car in Cena’s entrance!

Anyway…

Cena is just getting booed out of the building. Shows Chicago hated him away before CM Punk vs. Cena at MITB 11.

The storyline is very similar to HHH vs. Booker at Wrestlemania XIX.

HHH shows dominance early, giving the impression that he’s outwrestling Cena.

There’s even fuck you Cena chants in this. Didn’t think that began until ONS 06.

HHH goes for a piledriver on the floor…but gets backdropped on the ramp. Ouch.

NANANANANANANA HEY HEY HEY GOOD BYE chant. No idea why.

Awesome clothesline from HHH.

HHH working on the neck. Neckbreakers, neck vices, sleepers.

Big Cena comeback here. BOOOOOOOO!

Five Knuckle Shuffle countered into a Spinebuster!

He gets it the second time…and here is the STFU! Will the Game tap?!

HHH survives.

FU…countered and HHH shoves Cena and the ref into corner…then low blows them both!

HHH with the DX crotch chop. Foreshadowing!

Here comes the Sledgehammer!

HHH nails him!

Cena kicks out!

FU to HHH!

HHH kicks out!

Cena up top? Okay? Totally misses the crossbody. How random.

John Cena retains the title by making HHH submit in 22:02. HHH goes for the pedigree…but Cena turns it into a STFU. HHH tries to get to the ropes…but he’s forced to submit. It’s a solid match, but I don’t think it’s anything special. HHH put Cena over here, and that seems correct. You can’t go with the “this guy isn’t a good wrestler” narrative and then beat him down too (right Booker?)

This Wrestlemania had some good moments, some bad moments and a lot of whatever. Opener was whatever. RVD winning MITB II was good, and the match was decent. No idea what happened to Benoit, must have been an off night or JBL was that bad at this point. Foley vs. Edge was amazing. Booker/Sharmell vs. Boogey was the opposite. Trish vs. Mickie was great. Taker vs. Henry was whatever, but Taker gave it a moment with his dive. HBK vs. Vince is a bit of a fun brawl with some parts that dragged. Rey’s title win was a let down, although the match I guess is okay for what it was. Pillow Fight was fun to look at. HHH vs. Cena was solid, although not the most exciting of Wrestlemania main events.

Interesting note here: You know why WWE doesn’t care if you boo guys like Batista now? Because you booed Cena eight years ago and it didn’t matter, no one bit. Fans will give their money to WWE no matter what it seems. I’m included with that. I bought the Network after all.

Enough good moments here to get this out of C range, but I wouldn’t flat out call it good.

Final Grade: B-

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews WWE Unforgiven 2005

Unforgiven_2005

WWE Unforgiven 2005
September 18, 2005
Oklahoma City, OK
Reviewed on May 20, 2014

The Batista-John Cena era was well underway in WWE. For the past two years John Cena was slated to be the future, but something happened once he got there. After disposing of JBL, Cena went up against several internet favorites and the cheers went away. Cena was soon booed in arenas all over the world…and he NEVER got passed that. It began with Christian and Chris Jericho. Today it’s Daniel Bryan. The point is, John Cena became the machine’s champion. And the fans forever resented him for it.

Unforgiven is the start of a serious push for some guys that to be fair probably didn’t deserve it. Most notably in this case is Chris Masters. While Masters became a solid hand later, he was clearly not ready for this spot.

Another point of interest of this card is the Matt Hardy-Edge cage match that spawned from the real life Hardy-Edge-Lita feud. One of the first instances of what was later called the Reality Era was shown here.

The Card

Intercontinental Championship
Carlito© vs. Ric Flair

This was the period where HHH was gone after Batista destroyed him, and Flair was on his own. Flair became a face as a result.

Pretty slow start with a lot of strutting and wooing.

Ha, awesome spot where Flair actually hits a move off the top rope instead of being slammed off.

Ric Flair wins the title by submission in 11:46. Carlito goes to spit the apple in Flair’s face, but Flair punches him causing Carlito to choke. Figure Four and Carlito taps. I thought it started pretty boringly, but the finish was pretty good and the crowd was very into it.

Postmatch promo with Flair setting up the future Flair-HHH feud.

Lita and Edge were such awesome heels.

Torrie Wilson and Victoria vs. Trish Stratus and Ashley

The hell if I know what this feud is about.

Apparently Trish was injured since April and is just coming back now. I remember her being a bitch heel before that, so I guess it’s one of those babyface comebacks.

Victoria and Trish start. Those two always had good chemistry.

Trish and Ashley win when Trish pinned Victoria in 7:07. Chick Kick for the win. This wasn’t too bad actually! Mostly Trish vs. Victoria which is what was needed…since Torrie can’t wrestle and Ashley kinda can’t either.

Flair taking a bunch of lady fans to his limo. Flair is hilarious.

Big Show vs. Snitsky

Oh man this might be awful.

Sick back suplex by Snitsky on the Show!

Big Show pins Snitsky in 6:11. Chokeslam for the win. Actually…not bad! I’m shocked. It was short and to the point, and there was some good power wrestling there. That back suplex was awesome.

Haha, more Flair stuff.

There’s a lot of HBK vs. Chris Masters hype…even though the match isn’t coming up yet.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Kerwin White

Oh man Kerwin White.

Shelton Benjamin pinned Kerwin White in 8:06. White tries to hit Benjamin with the golf club…but Benjamin counters with the T-Bone for the win. Match was surprisingly dull. Not sure what was missing. I guess it wasn’t bad though.

Steel Cage Match
Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Story here: Where do I start? In real life Adam Copeland slept with Amy Dumas, who was Matt Hardy’s girlfriend. This led to Matt Hardy legit getting fired, but the crowd wanted him back. Crowd chanted “We Want Matt” everywhere. They brought him back and it was a huge deal all around. Edge and Matt had a lame Summerslam match though that ended via ref stoppage. Oddly, there was a shoehorned Kane storyline in this too, since Kane storyline wise was married to Lita. That got forgotten here.

Action packed start. Edge tries to escape quickly, but Matt lets him know this is gonna be a long one.

Powerbomb from the top leading to a ten count with both men down. Come on, it’s a Cage match, let’s not have that crap in here.

Crowd really gets behind Matt as he traps Edge in the ropes (as Edge trapped him at Summerslam) and punches away.

Side Effect off the top! Lita brings a chair into the ring…and then breaks up the pin!

Twist of Fate to Lita! Spear by Edge! Matt Hardy won’t die though.

Matt Hardy pins Edge in 21:05. Yodel Legdrop from the top of the cage ends Edge! Great match here. You really felt Matt Hardy hated both Edge and Lita here. Surprisingly, this didn’t launch Matt to the main event. Instead, this was perhaps his career peak. Still, a great match is a great match.

Bischoff-Cena confrontation. This came off as a poor man’s Austin-McMahon.

World Tag Team Championship
The Hurricane and Rosey© vs. Cade and Murdoch

Hurricane and Rosey were one of the least cared about Tag Champs ever.

WHATSUPWITTHAT?

Sick DDT from Murdoch on Hurricane where Hurricane was laying on the apron and Murdoch standing on the outside. Hurricane is dead.

Basically a handicap match now.

Murdoch and Cade win the title when Murdoch pinned Hurricane in 7:40. Hurricane staggers back and makes the tag, but he is still woozy and Cade and Murdoch hit a double team clothesline move for the win. Interesting story of the match with Hurricane, but match overall was pretty bad. The tag division overall at the time was really weak.

A girl comes out of Flair’s limo with only Flair’s robe on. Flair is hilarious.

Maria interviews Chris Masters. Maria asks him why he is called the Masterbate. No idea we had dumb Maria at this time. What an awesome character that was.

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Masters

Story here: Masters says HBK is a fossil and it’s time for new blood. HBK said that “Greenhorn”, people need to know their spot in the pecking order and Masters isn’t at the top yet.

Masters gets an early Masterlock but HBK manages to escape.

Torture Rack from Masters!

Michaels counters a Masterlock by jumping over the top rope, which was awesome.

Shawn Michaels pins Chris Masters in 17:27. HBK gets caught come off the top. Masters catches him and turns it into a near Masterlock, but HBK counters and hits Sweet Chin for the win. Wow, Chris Masters looked great here. It had to be HBK, since Masters didn’t remotely do anything before or after this match quality wise. HBK just knows how to wrestle bigger opponents. Very good match.

WWE World Championship
John Cena© vs. Kurt Angle

This match seems structured as Cena being the underdog and Angle being the big match experienced favorite.

This has been a good back and forth match.

Ref bump, and Cena gets the FU for zero!

Angle comes back with the Ankle Lock and Bischoff taunts him.

Kurt Angle wins by DQ in 17:17. Cena takes the WWE title belt and nails Angle…and the ref sees it! Seriously? That’s the PPV finish? A good match ruined by its ending. It’s endings like this that led to people not purchasing the B-tier PPVs anymore. Angle and Cena brawl some more afterwards.

Unforgiven 05 is a weird show as nothing was really bad on this show and there was some greatness…but none of it really mattered at all. Chris Masters? Midcarder a year later and unemployed the year after that. Matt Hardy? Ranged from upper midcard to midcard hell for a while until his brother overshadowed him again. He never got over the break-up with Lita. The finish to Angle-Cena just extended the storyline. I barely remember the rest of the show and I just watched it.

A good effort for all involved. For the great match and no bad matches this was in B territory…but you can’t have your main event end like that.

Final Grade: C+

Pro Wrestling

RDT Reviews WWECW One Night Stand

ECWonenightstand2005

ECW One Night Stand
June 12, 2005
New York, NY
March 2, 2014

Background: I had mentioned in the December to Dismember review that the 2004 Rise and Fall Documentary was the first step in the revival of ECW. This was step two. The documentary was a huge success. Rob Van Dam reportedly continually pitched the idea of a ECW Pay-Per-View. And here it is.

There was a lot of doubt in regards to how good this show would actually be. Would Vince McMahon ruin it? The InVasion was still kinda fresh in some people’s heads. Would Vince throw out a watered down product? A LOT of people thought this was going to be a failure. Like somehow JBL would be the last man standing or something.

Storyline wise, Paul Heyman wanted to bring ECW back for a One Night Stand, and Eric Bischoff, arguably the most hated man in ECW history, didn’t want it to happen. There was a lot of real life animosity between Bischoff and Heyman due to how Bischoff would raid ECW’s talent roster in the mid-90s. Of course Bischoff was very defensive about how some actually thought there were times when ECW was the #2 promotion in the world (something Bischoff even provides in the documentary). Nonetheless, Bischoff is the perfect heel for this scenario. On the Smackdown side, JBL was also against the show for the standard reason Jerry Lawler was against ECW in 1997. He didn’t think they were in his league and deserved any TV or PPV time the WWE could provide. Both Raw and Smackdown had threatened to invade One Night Stand.

The Card

The crowd is electric early on! ECW! ECW! ECW!

Here comes Joey Styles!

Everyone just seems so happy to be there.

“OH MY GOD!”

Mick Foley is going to be Joey’s commentating partner tonight. Awesome. A lot better than Schiavone and Hudson.

The new ECW intro video package at first doesn’t feel like what ECW is about…but then you realize if ECW ever made it big time this is exactly what it would look like.

Lance Storm vs. Chris Jericho

Storm of course has the beautiful Dawn Marie with him.

I believe Storm had recently retired. Of course, an ECW reunion show with a match vs. Jericho I’m sure was an easy sell. Styles and Foley actually state this this is intended to be Storm’s last match.

Impact Players are talked about from Styles and Foley. Will we see Justin Credible later?

Jericho comes out dressed as Lionheart Chris Jericho, but has the Y2J music. Good thing that theme owns anyway.

Storm and Jericho shake. These guys are best friends afterall.

Amazing chain wrestling to start. Favorite was a Jericho monkey flip being countered into a cartwheel from Storm.

Dawn gets the “she’s a crack whore” chant.

Jericho does a dropkick from the first rope. That just looked cool.

Lionheart chant. ECW crowds were great.

Lance Storm probably had the best dropkick in the business.

Storm even makes a delayed vertical suplex look amazing.

Storm jumps to the top rope, when he jumps back (which makes no sense, but whatever), Jericho dropkicks him in the back of the head! No one cares when spots make no sense when they were amazing.

Chris Candido chant. He had passed away like a week before this and was Storm’s partner in ECW.

Fuck John Cena chant. Because why not.

The Calgary Crab! Or the Straight Shooter, whatever you want to call it.

Justin Credible and Jason are here! Jericho fights them off.

Lance Storm pins Chris Jericho in 7:22. Jericho rolls up Storm, but Storm kicks out and Credible cracks Jericho right in the face! Storm gets the win! Styles says “what a crappy way to win your last match” Match was excellent. I wish it was longer.

We get a Gary Wolfe interview…time to reflect on a lot of ECW wrestlers who had passed.

Rocco Rock, Bam Bam Terry Gordy, Mike Lockwood (Crash Holly), The Original Sheik, Mike Lozansky, Pitbull Anthony Durante, Big Dick Dudley, Chris Candido all honored. Great video.

Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Super Crazy vs. Little Guido

Tajiri has Mikey Whipwreck and The Sinister Minister with him.

We are reminded that this is an elimination match.

I totally forgot Guido comes out with the whole FBI. JT Smith, Tony Mamaluke, Tracy Smothers, Big Guido. Just awesome.

Never understood how Super Crazy was never a bigger deal.

Tilt-a-whirl into an armbreaker from Guido to Tajiri, nice. They go into a chain wrestling sequence.

The way Super Crazy would nip-up from everything was great.

Crazy and Guido end up in the crowd.

O DIOS MIOS!

Super Crazy does a balcony moonsault onto the FBI! I’m pretty sure that was the moment fans realized this was going to really an ECW show and not a watered down show.

FBI interference everywhere. Tajiri mists Guido! Guido gets Whippersnappered from the top! Tajiri pins Guido! It is hard to keep up.

Double springboard moonsault!

Super Crazy wins when he pins Tajiri in 6:12. Crazy gets the top rope moonsault for the win! Can’t believe that was only 6 minutes. It was an amazing 6 minutes.

We get some ECW memories.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Psicosis

Psicosis takes off the mask to honor the ECW fans. Although the fans actually don’t appreciate it.

Rey’s theme does not fit here.

They both kinda start off slow, with a small botch in there. Still, it’s good chain wrestling though.

I remember people thinking Psicosis was wrestling for a job with the slow downed pace.

Suddenly the match kicks into high gear with Rey on the railing and getting hit by a Psycho Guillotine!

Psicosis misses a dropkick into the corner and does a violent flip into the mat. Psicosis was so good, shame he also never really got the big push in the WCW Cruiserweight division.

Rey does a seated senton into the crowd and Psicosis!

619 did not get a good response.

Rey Mysterio Jr. pinned Psicosis in 6:22. Rey hits the West Coast Pop for the win. You can kinda tell that Rey’s style changed a lot since becoming a WWE guy. The match wasn’t bad, it was still pretty good for the most part, but it was missing the flow you’d expect from both of these guys. It didn’t help that the previous two matches were a lot better.

Here come the Smackdown Invaders! JBL, Orlando Jordan and Kurt Angle are the leaders here.

We get a you suck dick chance. Angle will own them later. Now we get fuck you Smackdown.

JBL: “I got a ticket you little Mexican”!

Some more ECW memories.

Joel Gertner!

Kurt Angle and JBL embarrass Gertner. Good heel heat.

Angle cuts a promo.

ECW fans: You suck dick. Angle: Your mother taught me how!

JBL talks about how Madison Square Garden sells out with his name on the marquee. I like JBL, but that’s a stretch.

I do think this is one of JBL’s best promos. He buries the ECW fans pretty badly. It’s great.

Here comes Rob Van Dam and Bill Alfonso to shut JBL up!

RVD is megaover…obviously.

RVD points out that he will be shooting from the heart.

“Remember when RVD had a vocabulary?” This is RVD’s best ever promo as well.

RVD basically explains how much better he was used in ECW than WWE. He’s 100% right.

He tells the crowd the idea of an ECW PPV was his.

RVD talks about how crushed he was that he injured his leg how it won’t let him wrestle on the show.

RVD says the line that missing ONS sucks worse than missing Wrestlemania. I’m sure he means that 100% too.

It’s RHYNO!

Lights go out…it’s SABU! Great moment! Impromptu match!

Rhyno vs. Sabu

You got fired chant. Rhyno was fired a few weeks before this show.

Sabu with the springboard dive to the outside!

Nobody threw a chair into someone’s face like Sabu.

Air Sabu in the corner!

Triple Jump Moonsault blocked as Rhyno sends Sabu face first into the chair!

Ref gets GORED!

RVD is back in, nails Rhyno with the chair.

Skateboard! Dropkicks the chair in Rhyno’s face!

Sabu pinned Rhyno in 6:30. RVD puts Rhyno face first on the table….Arabian Skullcrusher through the table! Fun little brawl, great finish!

Foley and Styles steal one another’s lines, which was pretty awesome too.

Al Snow and Head promo! Snow blames Head for inviting the Invaders. Lol.

More ECW memories.

Here comes RAW!

“Oh no there’s Coach now I’m scared”. Lol.

Chris Benoit vs. Eddie Guerrero

Eddie plays rudo. While he’s great at it, I wish for this show he didn’t.

There’s an early sequence where Benoit accidentally breaks Eddie’s nose, which I think is the reason this match doesn’t live up to expecations.

Let’s go Benoit…Let’s go Eddie…Let’s go Eddie etc….

This match is surprisingly slow, and while it isn’t necessarily bad, it’s disappointing so far.

Eddie hits Benoit with a pretty nice chairshot to the back.

Very nice top rope superplex by Eddie.

Chris Benoit def. Eddie Guerrero by submission in 10:52. Benoit hits a Diving Headbutt, then makes Eddie tap to the Crossface. It was a hard hitting bout and by no means bad, but like Rey-Psicosis there was just something missing in it. Still though, it was good.

Gertner’s back!

Gertner asks something of Bischoff that he says everyone of ECW has been begging to ask him…”Can I please have a job?!” Hilarious!

Masato Tanaka vs. Mike Awesome

The best part of this match is Joey Styles trashing Awesome…and JBL rooting him on…because of his betrayal of ECW in 2000.

Crazy over the top rope suicide dive from Awesome. Unfortunately Joey Styles utters a line on commentary that became awkward when Awesome committed suicide 18 months later. (It’s a shame he didn’t succeed in taking his own life!)

AWESOME BOMB FROM THE APRON THROUGH A TABLE. I think Tanaka is dead. My god!

Big top rope splash from Mike Awesome. What hangtime!

Absolutely sickening chairshots! Tanaka no sells the first couple, but the third takes him down!

Tornado DDT on two chairs by Tanaka! This match is stiff and violent.

God damn Tanaka slams a chair on another chair on Awesome’s face…then does the same from the top rope!

Top rope chair shot!

Awesome is grabbing a table. Top rope Tornado DDT by Tanaka through the table!

Awesome Bomb from the top through the rest of the table! Tanaka kicks out! For sure thought it was over there!

Mike Awesome pinned Masato Tanaka in 9:52. Awesome hits Tanaka with another Awesome Bomb….from the ring through a table on the floor! Awesome adds a suicide dive over the top and the ref makes the count on the floor! Holy shit what a match. Some of the shots make me cringe, but god damn a great match is a great match. Awesome Awesome Bombs a ref at the end.

Here comes Heyman. Some more shootin’ comin’ up.

He isn’t crying, he just was smoking a joint with Van Dam!

He tells Bischoff that it’s not him at a WCW PPV, that he’s in ECW’s house!

Hide your wives, it’s Edge!

Matt Freak’in Hardy!…which actually seems to legitimately surprise Edge.

To JBL: The only reason you were WWE Champion for a year was because HHH didn’t want to work Tuesdays!

This stuff actually may seem tame for someone watching this for the first time in 2014, but at the time, a shoot like this on PPV was a big deal. Remember, this is pre-youtube and pre-twitter. In 2005, this was a great and revolutionary segment.

The Dudley Boyz vs. Tommy Dreamer and The Sandman

I know WWE Network has blocked out some violent spots in this one. If I remember them I’ll mention them.

Oddly, this would be the Dudley Boyz last WWE match.

Tommy Dreamer seems so happy to be there.

Of course no Enter Sandman on the Network. The entrance is still cool though. Sandman is horribly out of shape…but he would be in amazing shape one year later.

The Dudleyz dance to Enter Sandman in the ring. It was a pretty cool vision just overall.

IT’S THE BWO!

Stevie kick to the Sandman!

It’s Kid Kash. He hilariously dumps himself over the top rope.

Balls Mahoney and Axl Rotten!

Poor Nova gets double chairshotted: “That’s more painful than being Simon Dean on TV!”

Kid Kash somersault dives into everyone over the top rope to the outside!

Match begins.

We get some cheese grater action. Which I thought was edited out, but it’s not!

Of course, Dreamer is a bloody mess.

Dreamer wears a ladder and does the spinning ladder spot Terry Funk made famous.

Now Bubba Dudley gets the cheese grater!

The steel tray shots look stiff as fuck.

Bubba just dented a chair over Sandman’s head!

Holy shit is right.

Double Figure Fours is a funny spot here. You know, since the rest of the match had no wrestling whatsoever.

Storm and Credible are back!

That’s Incredible to the Sandman on Barbed Wire!

Francine is here and she low blows Dreamer!

Catfight with Francine and Beulah!

Dreamer and Beulah double DDT the Dudleyz!

Dreamer mocks the WWEDudleyz “WHAT’S UP” gimmick and makes sure D-Von isn’t having kids.

Sandman is powerbombed through a table.

3D to Dreamer!

Here comes Spike Dudley!

Spike is the key to getting a table on fire!

The Dudleyz win when Bubba pins Dreamer in 10:52. FLAMING TABLE! Dreamer gets powerbombed though and Bubba gets the pin. Wow. So violent but amazing match! Poor Dreamer!

Dudleyz threaten Beulah, but Sandman makes the save…and calls for a beer!

Here comes Stone Cold Steve Austin! Huge pop of course.

He’s wearing a XFL jersey. Lol.

Austin calls for the rest of ECW to come out for a show ending party.

Austin holds off on the beer. Austin challenges the Invaders to a fight!

We get a We Want Taz chant…and here he comes!

Angle vs. Taz showdown…

We have a brawl! Taz chokes out Angle!

Unfortunately this is where JBL stiffs The Blue Meanie. You can see the Dudleyz pull JBL to safety.

Mick Foley brings Eric Bischoff in.

Strategically, only WWE guys actually get a hand on Bischoff. First the 3D, then a Benoit flying headbutt, a Rey 619.

Bischoff lets out a fuck ECW!

Stone Cold Stunner to Bischoff!

The Dudleyz dump Bischoff somewhere outside the arena.

The ring full of ECW alumni celebrate as the show goes off the air!

Last Thoughts

What a show, what a fucking show.

Every match at minimum would be considered good. Jericho vs. Storm? Excellent. International Three Way Dance? Excellent. Rey vs. Psicosis, alright to good. Sabu vs. Rhyno? Good. Benoit vs. Eddie, alright to good. Awesome vs. Tanaka? Amazing, arguable Match of the Year Candidate. Dudleyz vs. Dreamer/Sandman, great.

Everything on this show connected. The history of ECW. The shoots. Even Austin being the man to challenge the Invaders gave ECW legitimacy.

Maybe if you didn’t grow up with ECW you don’t understand a lot of this. Afterall, ECW closed its doors 13 years ago and really hadn’t been all that great since 1999. Even so, you’d have to admit this was a very fun and very good show.

But if you grew up with ECW, well then, damnit, this show was perfect. It’s a shame 18 months later ECW as we knew it would be dead.

This show is great. One of the best Pay-Per-Views ever.

Final Grade: A+