TLC 2009
December 13, 2009
San Antonio, TX
Reviewed on April 19, 2014

Background: While there were new guys coming along…Vince just wouldn’t allow his top guys to not get the main event money.

Not that it was really his fault. Vince had been burned once again by pushing someone to the top, as Jeff Hardy didn’t immediately resign with WWE once his contract expired. WWE had put three world titles on Jeff in the 9 months before this and he still would jump to TNA in January. For all those who complain that Vince keeps guys like Cena, HHH, Taker, Orton etc. at the top, it’s because he knows these guys won’t just leave him in the smoke. Ever since Bobby Lashley kinda did the same in early 2008, Vince had begun this holding pattern of rocket pushing someone, then burying them for a while (I guess to establish that WWE is responsible for their success) and then determining what to do from that point. We see two stages of this here: the burial (we don’t actually see it, but the World Champion two months ago, CM Punk, loses the dark match to R-Truth) and the mega push (Sheamus, who would be in the burial stage about 10 months from this point. Interesting note, you can argue Vince was somewhat right about Punk, as he did walk out four years later.

Anyway, there is one new guy who may become a star tonight: Sheamus. Other than that, your main events have Undertaker, Batista, Cena, HHH, Jericho, Big Show and HBK in them. Not exactly building the next generation.

Another point, 2009 was the first year of just theming events (Hell in a Cell was two months earlier) and it’s always going to be disappointing. Gimmick matches should fit the feud, not be forced upon because so and so PPV is coming up. Oh well.

The Card

ECW World Championship: Ladder Match
Christian© vs. Shelton Benjamin

This actually sounds like an awesome idea and exactly what the ECW Title should be about.

Story: Christian wants to steal the show!

Michael Cole owns Matt Striker on commentary. Good stuff.

Nice knee to the spine from Shelton there.

Shelton lands on his feet from a monkey flip. He almost botched it, but it was good enough.

Christian gets busted open as a ladder falls on his face. Ouch.

We get an official tending to Christian. I don’t understand why this is happening. Shelton, just go get the belt! Stupid idea.

Benjamin hits a somersault plancha on Christian on the floor from the ladder…but that was a stupid spot as well. Christian wasn’t staggering or anything and even tried to climb the ladder to stop Shelton. How about running away Christian? Think of that?

Reverse DDT off the ladder. Nice.

Something you don’t see every ladder match, Christian actually stopping midclimb as he saw Shelton was gonna do something to him. Nice psychology. Shelton follows it with some awesome athleticism, which leads to this ladder falling clotheslines.

Powerslam off the ladder. Some really nice spots in this one.

Awesome spot where Christian hands from the belt holder…and lands on Shelton who powerbombs him into a ladder in the corner.

Shelton gets the sunset flip over the ladder spot and Christian counters into a hurricanrana into the corner!

Christian splashes Benjamin through a ladder!

Christian wins in 18:05. After the splash, Christian goes up and grabs the title. What a fun opener. Some underrated psychology with the spots looking natural instead of contrived (which is why the first MITB is better than the others, for the record). The middle part where Christian was bleeding hurt it a bit, but a fun match is a fun match. Good chance at being the match of the night.

Intercontinental Championship
John Morrison vs. Drew McIntyre

This was pre-good music for McIntyre.

McIntyre was McMahon’s chosen superstar, which in hindsight, is hilarious. Could have tied that into a Vince is losing his mind at an older age gimmick.

Although I’m probably higher on McIntyre than most, he was not nearly ready for the big time yet.

Really nice tilt a whirl into a DDT counter from Morrison.

Reverse Alabama Slam was pretty cool from Drew.

Morrison with a Disaster kick off the apron. Nice.

Horrible Starship Pain there.

Drew McIntyre pins John Morrison to win the title in 10:19. Scot Drop, or Future Shock DDT for the win. Morrison carried McIntyre here as Morrison did anything entertaining in this thing. Decent match overall, but no one cared about who went over.

WWE Women’s Championship
Michelle McCool© vs. Mickie James

I think this was part of the Piggy James storyline.

Ok it was. Honestly I would have been fine with the whole angle…if James wins at the end of course.

This is a pretty good Diva’s match.

Michelle McCool retains in 7:31. Layla shoves Mickie off the top rope…but she spin kicks Layla off the apron. Roll up gets 2, but then McCool hits a brutal kick to the face for the win. Pretty good Diva’s match, a lot of hard hitting and a nice finish.

WWE World Championship: Tables Match
John Cena© vs. Sheamus

Story: Sheamus won an up and comer battle royal. He destroyed everyone on ECW. He put Mark Cuban through a table. He ended Jamie Noble’s career. He was a legit bad ass. So CAN CENA OVERCOME THE ODDS?!

I know the general idea is everyone is better as a heel, lol. But…Sheamus was a real bad ass as a heel. This should be his character now.

Fans want Sheamus to win. Can Cena be cheered against anyone?

At least this match has been 50:50, and not Cena just killing Sheamus.

Match really picks up when Cena and Sheamus brawl on the outside.

Sheamus throwing the table out of the ring when getting beat up by Cena was a great spot.

Sheamus wins the title when he “shoves” Cena through a table at 16:19. They tease a superplex spot…but Sheamus shoves Cena off the top and falls off himself, but Cena crashes through the table in the ring. Awful finish. Many thought it was a botch as Sheamus lands near a table on the outside. I don’t think so though as they act naturally afterwards. Nonetheless, finish sucks because it doesn’t put Sheamus over! It looks like a mistake, that Sheamus got lucky! If you are gonna go with him, GO WITH HIM. Cena can take a loss here. Jeez. Sheamus’s reign goes horribly too, as he’s an undercard champ and a transitional champion…and his reign meant NOTHING in terms of historical value. Whatever. The match itself wasn’t bad though.

World Heavyweight Championship: Chairs Match
The Undertaker© vs. Batista

Batista turned heel on Rey Mysterio and it was damn refreshing. Batista as always, wanted the title. So here we are.

I have high hopes for this, as Taker and Batista had oddly great chemistry in 07-08.

In a Chairs match, the only legal weapon is a chair.

I do like how Batista didn’t waste time and went right for a chair.

Batista uses a chair shot and a low blow to win the title? How weak was that?

The Undertaker retains the title by pin in 13:14. Teddy Long comes out and says the low blow is still illegal, so the match is restarted. Boot and Tombstone for the win. The finish somehow got worse! I thought Teddy Long was a heel at this point? No wonder neither World Title match was the main event, both finishes blew. Also, this match never connected and was slow the whole way. Ah well.

Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston

There was a Kofi-Orton segment right before this where Kofi calls Orton a coward. Ok then. Weird timing for that.

This was the trying to get Kofi Kingston over as a top guy attempt. Never stuck.

Randy Orton pins Kofi Kingston in 13:11. RKO! Not much to say here. I guess Kofi wrestled Orton 50:50, which was nice to push Kofi, but some guys are just meant to be midcard fun babyfaces, and one of those guys is Kofi Kingston. Match was completely uneventful.

Batista confronts Teddy Long. He says he was robbed (he was) and Long better make it right.

WWE Unified World Tag Team Championship: Tables, Ladders and Chairs
Chris Jericho and Big Show© vs. Triple H and Shawn Michaels

You know I laughed that this was main eventing and neither World Title matches were (same happened at HIAC), but with it being in San Antonio for Shawn and the fact that both World Title matches had bs finishes, I’m okay with it.

DX was probably the hottest act in the company at that point too, so I guess that helps justify it.

Odd portion near the beginning where Big Show and Chris Jericho fight HHH on the rampway…then HBK joins then, HBK…GO FOR THE BELTS!

Dueling chairs!

Suplexing a ladder on Jericho. Ouch.

Pretty cool spot where they hang HHH in the tree of toe in the ladder, then send Shawn flying into him…where Shawn does his corner flip.

That had to be the best punch to the chair I’d ever seen. Looks like it killed HHH.

Big Show actually takes the flying off the ladder hanged on the top rope spot, nice.

Pedigree right after looks terrible though.

Big Show breaks a ladder for no reason. Odd.

A DX ladder sandwich…and Big Show breaks another ladder.

DX wins the Tag Team Titles at 22:32. Pretty funny ending. Show takes out DX, but there’s no ladder in the ring since Big Show broke them. Jericho tried to balance himself on Show’s shoulders…but this fails as Jericho can’t free his hands to grab the belts. DX comes back in, and Show and Jericho are stuck. Sweet Chin Music to Show…and that sends Jericho flying to the outside and he hits a table face first. Another SCM, then HHH holds up the half ladder and HBK grabs the belts. Not bad. A little slow at times but it was pretty good otherwise. It was a ladder match disguised as a tornado tag match, which was quite refreshing actually.

Kinda tough to review. Most of the matches were good…but none of them were great (maybe Christian vs. Shelton was close). Both World Title matches having bs finishes sucked. Main ended the right way though. Historically, this show probably hurt Sheamus more than helped him, which is crazy since he won the World Title. DX winning the tag belts didn’t mean a whole lot, they lost them to Miz and Show a couple of months later.

Maybe I could get this into the B range had Taker vs. Batista not sucked. Or if Orton vs. Kofi mattered at all. But they didn’t. Can’t ignore the mostly good wrestling though.

Final Grade: C+