WWE Royal Rumble 2003
January 19, 2003
Boston, MA

The Brand Extension is in full force.

The WWE has established their monopoly of pro wrestling in the United States at this point (TNA was still pretty new…although they’d never be a real threat anyway). Vince McMahon decided he needed to instill competition into the product and the Brand Extension was born. The Brand Extension allowed WWE to push new talent, although it would be shown a lot of them weren’t ready for the challenge.

One of them that looked more than ready was Brock Lesnar. Lesnar, who just dropped the WWE Title at Survivor Series was on his way to the massive face push that would make him the WWE’s top guy (Lesnar would be the Hogan on Smackdown, where HHH would be the Flair on RAW). In a post Austin and full time Rock world, WWE needed to create some megastars on top in the babyface mold. HHH showed he was a lot better off as a heel. Undertaker would never fit that mold. Austin was gone, Rock was basically gone. Goldberg wasn’t here yet. Angle was a heel at the time (although he got a shot at the face run later) and Benoit would never have the charisma to be that guy, although he got a shot later.

Still, the early days of Brand Extension provided interesting content on both sides for sure. Returning legends (HBK, Hogan, Flair), guys way too talented not to be in the main event but somehow not in it (Jericho, Benoit, Booker T), top guys who weren’t ready to leave the top (Taker, HHH) and top newcomers (Lesnar) were just some of the elements out there. I mean in that group I didn’t even mention Angle or Big Show.

Let’s see how the first Brand Extension Royal Rumble plays out.

The Card

Winner Gets in the Royal Rumble
Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show

Story here: Lesnar dropped the WWE Title (and was pinned for the first time) to Big Show at Survivor Series when Paul Heyman turned on him. In actuality two things caused that change: Lesnar had injured ribs that WWE wasn’t sure of the extent of, and WWE was planning Lesnar vs. Angle at Mania and decided to switch the face/heel alignments, so had to make Lesnar a face. Of course, face Angle had to beat heel Big Show for the belt, which led to a weird Angle heel turn, but I guess that was the best way to make this happen. Angle would JOIN Heyman afterwards, and for some reason this didn’t turn Big Show face.

Back to the story, Lesnar then cost Big Show the title at Armageddon against Angle. So we got this match. I’m usually not a big fan of these type matches, as for a storyline like this it’s obvious Lesnar is winning this match AND the Rumble. There was one other option for the Rumble winner, which I’ll get into when we get there.

The way Lesnar would just suplex Big Show all over the place was ridiculous.

The way Show would throw Lesnar around was also ridiculous. While he obviously could, no one else did anything like that to Brock up to this point.

Big Show does a great, if not hilarious shocked face when Lesnar kicks out of the chokeslam.

Brock Lesnar pins Big Show in 6:29. Lesnar escapes a 2nd chokeslam attempt, and gets the F5! That’s so damn impressive and the crowd pops huge. Lesnar gets the pin and is in the Rumble. Good match, if only for how smooth Lesnar is in throwing around Big Show. These two had a strange chemistry.

Terri interviews Chris Jericho. She asks him about Jericho choosing #2 when he had the choice to pick any number. Jericho says because HBK was #1 Jericho HAD to be #2. This was setting up the Jericho-HBK feud.

Jericho sure got A LOT of mileage out of beating Austin and Rock the same night to become Undisputed Champion (as he should have).

RAW World Tag Team Championship
William Regal and Lance Storm vs. The Dudley Boyz

This would be the third Rumble in a row that the Dudleyz were in the World Tag Title slot. They are already 15 Time World Tag Team Champions at this point.

Regal and Storm were what was left of the UnAmericans. Test started being advertised by male genitalia. Christian became Jericho’s sidekick.

Regal still had the brass knuckles gimmick going at this point as well.

The Dudleyz actually weren’t stale here, as they were split up throughout most of 2002 due to the Brand Extension (that led to Reverend D-Von!). D-Von was part of the Big Show to Smackdown trade and immediately rejoined Bubba at Survivor Series.

One of the problems with the Dudley reunion was they didn’t change anything up at all. They literally acted like the same team they always did, moves and all.

Chief Morley comes out to argue about something, and Regal has Brass Knucks!

The Dudley Boyz wins the title when D-Von pinned Storm in 7:24. Regal has the Knucks…but gets the 3D anyway. D-Von picks up the knucks and nails Storm for the win. A good pop for the Dudley title win. This is a waste of Storm and Regal though. Match wasn’t anything special and pretty boring.

Nathan Jones promo! He escaped from prison in Tasmania! It’s like Nailz all over again.

Stepmother vs. Stepdaughter
Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie

Oh god. This storyline was Wrestlecrap from the get go. Dawn Marie fell in love with Torrie Wilson’s father, Al Wilson. This at first seemed like an attempt to have a fling with Torrie, which was “shown” at Armageddon. Dawn and Al continued their relationship and got married, but Al died on the honeymoon because of a heart attack as a result of too much sex or something. Then Torrie and Dawn fought at the wake. It was actually worse than it sounds.

I mean who the hell thought any of that was a good idea?

Torrie doesn’t fall on the Dawn Marie armbar. That could have been a broken arm right there.

Dawn Marie with a springboard clothesline! How about that. It didn’t look great though.

Torrie Wilson pins Dawn Marie in 3:36. Swinging neckbreaker for the win. Torrie and Dawn are not really wrestlers, so to expect anything more than a bad match would be unrealistic. We got that springboard clothesline so there’s that at least? At least this was short. Storyline is still horrid.

Stephanie McMahon and Eric Bischoff meet backstage (where Bischoff was speaking to a still rookie Randy Orton). Steph tells Bischoff good bye, as Vince had given Bischoff 30 days to turn RAW around. Bischoff said he had a bombshell to save his job (which turned out to be Austin). Stephanie said she had a bombshell of her own (which turned out to be Hogan).

Sean O’Haire vignette! I still think he would have worked out if not for Roddy Piper’s involvement in the angle.

World Heavyweight Championship
Triple H© vs. Scott Steiner

Story: Steiner debuted at Survivor Series (as a face no less. Pretty sure that was the opposite of what the Big Poppa Pump character was about) and decided on RAW as his home. A part of the agreement was he gets a World Title shot.

The match actually has a solid start. Hard hitting from Steiner followed by a gorilla press slam. It would get worse though…

I hate Boston Crabs where the guy doesn’t sit on the back. That’s the point Steiner!

Steiner with a belly to belly suplex! He goes for the Recliner but Flair pulls HHH out.

Steiner is breathing HEAVY. He’s already exhausted.

Another belly to belly (kinda) from Steiner.

We get a weird Tombstone reversal sequence which ends with a botched HHH neckbreaker.

Steiner catches HHH coming off the top…for another belly to belly suplex.

Fans begin turning on Steiner….there’s ANOTHER belly to belly.

Another belly to belly. It’s clear Steiner has nothing else. Fans booing.

A sixth belly to belly.

Steiner goes for a double underhook suplex, and Steiner FALLS before the move is finished. Yikes.

HHH gets busted open by the leather part of the World Title.

ANOTHER BELLY TO BELLY.

Steiner doing his push-up taunt is like a NFL defensive lineman celebrating a sack when his team is down 30 points.

HHH tries to get counted out and DQed, but Earl Hebner won’t allow it. Steiner throws in yet another belly to belly while he’s at it.

Scott Steiner wins by DQ in 18:14. HHH finally uses the sledgehammer, forcing the DQ. Post match, Steiner destroys HHH and locks him in the Recliner. Crowd is dead for it. Match was historically bad, and has an argument for being the worst PPV World Title match ever. Scott Steiner was dreadful. There’s a reason he was a midcarder after this (although he did get a HHH rematch at No Way Out).

WWE World Championship
Kurt Angle© vs. Chris Benoit

We covered Angle’s story earlier. We’ll add here that this feud also involved the debut of Team Angle, Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas, which owned.

Benoit actually turned amidst all this as well, and became the #1 contender after being Big Show on Smackdown. Angle and Benoit were reluctant Smackdown Tag Team Champions back in October, and even had a match at Unforgiven as well. This was the end of Benoit the heel, as this face run would go through the rest of his career.

So, as all Benoit vs. Angle feuds go, it comes down to who’s the better wrestler?

Team Angle gets ejected quickly for trying to hold Benoit back.

Watching this match makes me feel that Steiner and HHH was in slow motion.

Benoit DDTs Angle on the apron! Nice.

Angle’s belly to belly suplexes are about 100 times better than Steiner’s.

This has been a non-stop action packed match from the get go.

Rolling Germans from Benoit…but Angle counters into his own!

Benoit re-counters!

I never got why Benoit did that snot thing.

Angle tosses Benoit off the top rope with a belly to belly!

Angle Slam attempt turns into the Crossface! Crowd is very into it. Angle survives though.

Benoit locks Angle into the Ankle Lock…but Angle reverses into his own Ankle Lock! THAT gets turned into the Crossface!

Angle counters a Crossface with an Angle Slam! Wow!

Another great false finish with Benoit countering a German with a victory roll.

Benoit gets a German…only it turns into an overhead release German where Angle lands face first!

Flying Headbutt 3/4th of the ring away!

Angle drops Benoit face first on the turnbuckles leading to another Angle Slam…but Benoit survives THAT too.

Kurt Angle retains by submission in 19:50. Angle counters another Crossface into the Ankle Lock. Benoit tries to escape, but Angle hangs on. Benoit does an amazing sell job here, screaming in pain. Angle grapevines the leg and Benoit is trapped, and taps out (makes you wonder why Angle didn’t always do that). I was blown away the first time I saw this 12 years ago, but it holds up today as well. Incredible match. This match was the match that showed Benoit could play an incredible underdog babyface, and he rode that all the way to winning the title at Mania XX (well, there was a haphazard team with Rhino in there). Just an amazing match. Benoit gets a standing ovation afterwards.

Kane and Rob Van Dam talk about how it’s every man for himself. This leads to a good spot later.

The Royal Rumble

#1 is Shawn Michaels. Jericho is supposed to be #2, but for some reason Christian shows up in the entrance way. Jericho attacks HBK from behind and beats the holy hell out of him. Jericho lays HBK out with a chair and HBK sells it like a million bucks. Chris Nowinski is #3, but he waits on the outside. Jericho beats on HBK a bit more then dumps him, to the horror of the crowd.

#4 is Rey Mysterio, and he owns Jericho for a bit. Nowinski finally gets in there to attack Rey from behind.

Edge is #5. Edge and Rey had been a team, so they natural work together. They eventually go at it though and there’s a false elimination that I think gets screwed up. I think Edge’s feet do hit the floor. No biggie though.

Christian is #6, for real this time. He tries to get on Edge’s good side to double team Mysterio. Edge spears him though.

Rey and Edge hit a double dropkick off the top to Nowinski, but the timing is off and I think Nowinski got hurt here as Edge’s leg lands on his face.

#7 is Chavo Guerrero. Good workrate early on for sure. Rey gets Nowinski out. Jericho gets out Rey. Great heat for Jericho eliminating HBK and Rey so far.

#8 is Tajiri. Crazy airplane spin on Chavo.

#9 is Bill DeMott. What a random push this was.

#10 is Tommy Dreamer. It’s Hardcore Rumble II! Dreamer accidentally legit cracks Jericho in the eye with a kendo stick, busting him open bad.

Con-garbage can lid-to on Dreamer! He’s gone by Jericho and Christian.

#11 is B2. Too lazy to super script here. He’s injured as John Cena turned on him on Smackdown. He lasts about 30 seconds. Jericho gets rid of Tajiri. Edge gets rid of Chavo. Jericho gets rid of Edge and Christian. Jericho is alone in the ring.

#12 is Rob Van Dam! A great near-elimination is in there, where Jericho barely hangs on.

Matt Strongly Dislikes Mustard. #13 is Matt Hardy! Hardy and Jericho double team RVD. Jericho takes a Five Star Frog Splash!

#14 is Eddie Guerrero. No reaction for Eddie…but boy would that change over the next year.

Eddie with a kinda botched Frog Splash there. Matt turns right on him and hits a Twist of Fate. Just in time for…

Jeff Hardy at #15! The Hardys did not get along at this point.

Shannon Moore tries to push Matt back into the ring with his feet. He then takes a Swanton for Matt! Shannon Moore was a great sidekick.

#16 is Rosey. Out goes the workrate.

#17 is Test. The Testicle marketing was just weird.

#18 is John Cena, and we get a whole rap on his way to the ring. He rhymes explain to ya and Wrestlemania. So there’s that. We get Latrell Sprewell and Mike Tyson references as well.

#19 is Team Angle’s Charlie Haas

RVD gets rid of Jeff when Jeff went to the top rope and RVD shoved him off.

#20 is Rikishi. Apparently he’s been in more Royal Rumbles than anyone else in history at this point. RIkishi’s spinning sell of the clothesline was already pretty good.

#21 is Jamal. Both members of Three Minute Warning are in there.

#22 is Kane. JR mentions no one has come close to Kane’s 11 man elimination record…even though the previous record was 10. He gets rid of Rosey on cue.

#23 is Shelton Benjamin. Both members of Team Angle in there now.

#24 is Booker T. This is the other possible winner I mentioned earlier. There were rumors he would win (which made sense since he eventually got the World Title slot at Mania against HHH), but Lesnar was the “safe choice”. In retrospect you had to do Lesnar for the story. But Booker was the dark horse.

Booker dumps Eddie!

#25 is A-Train. He immediately derails Cena, a precursor to the Tensai-Cena feud nine years later surely.

Shawn Michaels runs in and attacks Jericho, and it’s enough of a distraction for Test to eliminate Jericho. While this set up Jericho vs. HBK…what the hell was Test eliminating Jericho for? Weird choice there.

#26 is Maven. Not much to say here.

#27 is Goldust. It was pretty crazy Goldust actually got a full time run in 2002, but he wouldn’t last that much longer. He’d come back a lot later though. Charlie Haas eliminates him after about 40 seconds.

Team Angle surprisingly eliminates Booker T. Odd choice there too.

#28 is Batista with awesome music. He gets rid of Test and Rikishi.

#29 is Brock Lesnar! Team Angle double teams, but Lesnar sends them both out. Matt Hardy is F5ed onto them as well.

A-Train kills both Batista and Lesnar in one sequence. How weird does that seem now.

#30 is Undertaker. While the crowd pops, this was a pretty big disappointment. There were several promo videos about Taker coming back at the Rumble, but the first one hinted he could be the Deadman, and the second mentioned the Ministry. So there was hope he would be back in the Deadman character here.

Taker is the only man to have three #30 Rumble appearances I believe, ’97, ’03 and ’07.

Taker gets rid of Cena and Jamal. A great spot follows though, as Maven dropkicks Taker and immediately celebrates. Maven shocking eliminated Taker in this manner in 2002. Taker sends Maven out.

RVD, A-Train, Kane, Lesnar, Batista and Taker left. All the workrate didn’t make it.

RVD and Kane work together to get rid of A-Train. Then another great moment: Kane goes to slam RVD on Batista…only to toss RVD out instead! They foreshadowed this in their promo earlier.

Batista, Lesnar, Taker and Kane are your final four. Crazy final four considering what Batista would become later.

Lesnar and Taker almost mess up a hangman, and Taker almost goes over the top rope. Lesnar noticeably saves him.

Interestingly, Taker tombstones Lesnar here, but Lesnar’s head is obviously too high up. It’s interesting because the same thing happens at Wrestlemania XXX.

Taker clotheslines Batista out, then tries to convince Kane to double team Lesnar. Taker turns on Kane immediately (not a big fan of that either) and tosses him. Batista runs in with a chair but Taker takes him out and whacks him with the chair.

Brock Lesnar wins the Royal Rumble in 53:41, last eliminating the Undertaker. Taker says something to Batista, and Lesnar sneaks up behind him and dumps him. Taker shakes his head in disbelief and gives Lesnar props. I am not a big fan of this ending though and this only fueled the idea that HHH and Taker were holding people down (I’ve come to think Taker wasn’t really doing this though). Taker took out Batista twice, outsmarted his brother, and Lesnar could only beat him by a sneak attack? While there are certainly some good moments, the outcome was never in doubt and the Rumble itself, while fine, is mostly forgettable.

It’s rare that a Royal Rumble PPV is known more for the title matches than the Rumble match itself, but that is what happened here. HHH vs. Steiner is remembered for all the wrong reasons. Benoit vs. Angle for all the right ones. Having one of the worst World Title matches and best World Title matches back to back is quite the oddity. Steiner didn’t last too long as a main eventer and was a midcarder by Mania (and wasn’t on the Mania card!). Benoit eventually got to the top. So at least something went right there. The Lesnar win was expected obviously, but the finish was pretty weak. I love Undertaker, but that whole return was pretty weak as well, and there was no need to make everyone look bad there.

I’ll give this show a historical bonus though. Cena Royal Rumble debut. Randy Orton on PPV (his first time maybe? His first PPV match wasn’t until Summerslam I know that). Batista with his first top 4 Rumble finish (in fact, in every Rumble Batista has been in he ended up in the top 4). The Lesnar victory. These were small building blocks to the future.

Final Grade: B