WWF Wrestlemania XXVIII
April 1, 2012
Miami, FL
Reviewed on July 13, 2014

Once in a Lifetime…(Of course, this was only true if you died with the next year or if you were born after this match)

The Rock vs. John Cena was one of those dream matches you always hear about. What would happen if Sting fought Shawn Michaels? The Undertaker vs. Andre the Giant. Kurt Angle vs. Bret Hart…CM Punk vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin.

So what would happen if The Rock took on John Cena?

In theory there was nothing wrong with this main event. The Rock was the top guy in the late 90s early 00s, Cena is the top guy now. Wrestlemania 28 made a ton of money to the surprise of no one.

But even so, even this was a little bit missing for the hardcore fans. Hardcore fans would have preferred Punk vs. Austin as a top guy vs. top guy dream match for sure. The Rock coming back was exciting, but without the Attitude Era he was a bit watered down, regulating his gimmick to saying Cena liked Frutty Pebbles and Froot Loops and that Vickie Guerrero was fat. Cena…was just Cena. Booed and all. It was a bit underwhelming. To be fair, it didn’t really need buildup anyway.

This show was designed to get the Attitude watchers back. In conjunction with WWE ’13 later, which was Attitude themed, WWE really was pushing to grabs those fans back and hope that they’d connect with the current roster, specifically CM Punk.

So as a result, we have HHH vs. Undertaker III. Inside Hell in a Cell. Basically the HIAC Dream Match.

How did Once in a Lifetime fare?

The Card

Lillian Garcia’s voice is amazing.

World Heavyweight Championship
Daniel Bryan© vs. Sheamus

Sheamus won the Royal Rumble and was rewarded by being in the Mania opener.

Interestingly, these two were slated for a US Title match at Mania 27, but was cut to make sure The Rock could talk for 20 minutes.

Bryan won the World Title in a MITB-cash in scenario at TLC 2011, and became an entertaining annoying heel champion. He also began to get “YES!” over here.

Sheamus pins Daniel Bryan to win the title in 0:15. Bryan kisses AJ and gets his head kicked off by Sheamus. One of the most awful ideas in WWE history here. I purposely reviewed Mania 11 before this because there is a connection here.

I wrote about in the Mania 11 review that the Diesel strong kickout really hurt his run and caused fans to feel sympathy for HBK, leading to an ill fated face turn. Well, this is that times 1000. It killed Sheamus dead as a top face so badly he still hasn’t recovered in 2014. It ironically MADE Bryan. Fans were already chanting YES!, but now it was deafening. WWE smartly didn’t turn Bryan face either, they let it build up. Sheamus winning a solid 12-15 minute match would have been solid for him.

Also, while this should never really be done, it can be done just fine sometimes even for the World Title (see Diesel vs. Backlund). But the opener of WRESTLEMANIA and a WORLD TITLE match shouldn’t be 15 seconds.

It was also reported later people were filing in and didn’t even realize they missed the match until later. Incredible.

Team Johnny in the house. The Miz received a huge demotion, since he was in the main last year.

Randy Orton vs. Kane

Kane was still wearing the steel mask here in his 2011 monster comeback. Apparently this feud is over Kane losing to Orton in some forgettable match in the summer of 2011, and he was disappointed in himself for shaking Orton’s hand.

This was after Kane’s “Embrace The Hate” campaign with Cena and Zack Ryder. For the record, this should have been Ryder and not Orton.

Daniel Bryan chants start the match. Way to go WWE. Way to go.

Interestingly this is the third straight Mania with Orton far away from the main event. Streak would end at 4.

Michael Cole calls Orton’s DDT a bulldog. Good to see Cole is on tonight.

Pretty boring match overall.

Kane pinned Randy Orton in 11:00. Chokeslam from the top rope wins it. Didn’t look nearly as good as when Matt Hardy took it at Summerslam ’04, but it got the job done. Interestingly, this match was apparently decided this way to screw up betting lines.

Santino and Mick Foley advertising Deadliest Catch. Good thing Mick never had a pirate gimmick…

DAMN!

Intercontinental Championship
Cody Rhodes© vs. Big Show

Ludicrous idea of Big Show wanting a Wrestlemania moment after being a joke in so many Wrestlemanias. Sorry if I don’t buy a multi-time World Champion (including as recently as a few months prior) as thinking winning the IC title is his big Mania moment.

The intro video for this is gold though.

I became a big Cody Rhodes fan around this time.

Spear off the Disaster Kick was cool I guess.

Big Show wins the title in 5:18. Knock out punch for the win. Big Show cries afterwards. Again, pretty ridiculous. Match was a whole lot of nothing. It was a shame Rhodes’ long reign ended here.

Kelly Kelly and Maria Menounos vs. Beth Phoenix and Eve Torres

I do think it is pretty awesome that Menounos is a huge WWE fan.

I always thought it was interesting that the Stinkface became a Diva move even thought it was originated by Rikishi.

Nice somersault senton from Kelly.

I miss Beth Phoenix.

Maria and Kelly win when Maria pinned Beth in 6:49. Roll-up for the win. Not bad considering one team is Kelly and a celebrity.

End of an Era Hell in a Cell Match
Triple H vs. The Undertaker

Shawn Michaels is your special guest referee.

This is a long storyline that really began at Royal Rumble 2007 with HBK vs. Taker’s Rumble finish.

Last year, Taker beat HHH at Mania 27, but didn’t walk out. That was his justification for the match, he didn’t want that to be his last memory. This is HHH’s chance again to Break the Streak.

Jim Ross will be calling this!

Somehow a bald Undertaker still looked bad ass.

Surprisingly we get the Metallica theme on the Network for the Cell.

No wasting time here. Both men go right at one another.

A good knock out brawl so far. Each throwing the other into the cell. Steel steps. How HIAC’s in the PG era need to be done.

HHH goes for a pedigree on the steel steps…and Taker backdrops him off. Nice!

Spinebuster on the steps! Taker shocks HHH right afterwards with Hell’s Gate! HHH powerbombs Taker out of it! Good play on the Mania 27 ending.

Out comes the chair! Also a good play on last year’s match.

HHH goes nuts with the chair. HBK tries to stop him, but that’s not gonna fly in HIAC of course.

This establishes HBK’s conflict. HHH tells HBK if he wants it to be over, then to end it himself. HHH then shoves HBK away. Taker tells him not to stop it. It is really pretty awesome and the crowd gets into it.

HHH takes it to a level he didn’t last year and brings in the sledgehammer!

Sldegehammer to the face. Kinda believable as a finish, and fans get into the false fall.

HBK stops HHH from squashing Taker’s head with the sledgehammer, which woulda been something.

At the time it was pretty believable that HBK could end it at some point to end the streak, which is what makes this so effective.

Taker locks HBK in the Hell’s Gate to stop him from ending the match…and HHH comes down on Taker’s head with the sledgehammer! Wow!

Taker gets Hell’s Gate on HHH…there’s no tap out or referee though. It leaves all three men lying.

Charles Robinson in the house!

Chokeslam, HHH kicks out. Taker responds by chokeslamming Robinson of course.

Taker goes for the Tombstone, but HHH pushes Taker into Sweet Chin Music from HBK! I swear, that was the streak right there. Pedigree…and Taker kicks out! I was shocked when I first saw that. That was perhaps the greatest false finish I’d ever seen.

HHH throws HBK out of the ring…and then Taker shocks HHH with a sit-up! Amazing.

Tombstone…but HHH survives.

Pedigree…but Undertaker survives. Crowd is eating all of this up.

Taker’s turn to beat the shit out of HHH with the chair. HHH’s professional receipt.

Taker stops HHH’s sldeghammer attack. One last DX crotch chop and Taker whacks him with the sledgehammer as HBK’s back is symbolically turned.

The Undertaker pins Triple H in 30:45. Tombstone for the end. Taker, HHH, HBK walk out together in what SHOULD have been Taker and HHH’s last match. It couldn’t have been more perfect. Anyway, right here is a sure top 10 Wrestlemania match, and arguably top 5. It had everything and booked two guys perfectly. A perfect match of history, carnage and false finishes. This is why Brock Lesnar vs. HHH DIDN’T work next year, and arguably why Lesnar vs. Taker didn’t two years later. Incredible. My co-Match of the Year in 2012, only because TLC 2012’s Kane/Bryan/Ryback vs. Shield match was insane. I have trouble deciding between the two. But incredible. Absolutely incredible. It really should have been the End of an Era. It was perfect.

Hall of Fame time. Flair in the Horsemen, Edge are the main events. Weird that Edge retiring was three years ago.

Heath Slater gets beat up by Flo Rida. Slater is pretty hilarious.

Team Teddy (Santino, R-Truth, Kofi Kingston, Zack Ryder, The Great Khali, Booker T) vs. Team Johnny (The Miz, David Otunga, Mark Henry, Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger, Drew McIntyre)

Winning Team’s GM becomes sole GM or something like that.

I always hate the color shirts thing for big teams. It totally takes away from the individuality of the wrestlers. Same for them not having their own music.

Why the hell was Otunga the team captain?!

Same goes for Santino.

Eve came out with Ryder as well. Never guess how that goes wrong.

Booker T gets a majority of the time. I like Booker T, but that seems counterproductive at this point in terms of giving younger guys a chance.

Somehow throwing Hornwoggle at Mark Henry was a good idea? Seriously?

Ziggler has to save Miz from a Cobra. Long way from fighting Cena I see.

Awesome Rough Rider where Miz counters…but Ryder lands on Ziggler anyway.

Team Johnny wins in 10:38 when Miz pins Zack Ryder in 10:38. Eve does the WOO WOO WOO taunt with Ryder in the ring, but the ref tries to get Eve out and this distracts Ryder. Miz gets the Skull Crushing Finale for the win. This would build up to Miz vs. Ryder right? Of course not…

Eve then kicks Ryder low. Just kill off a popular young guy why don’t we? People who hate Ryder now just ignore how over he really was. Worst part was Ryder was actually showing some character here of actually getting pissed at Eve instead of just being the happy-go-lucky face he was.

Anyway, good way to get everyone involved. Sure as hell better than the other crappy multi-man tag matches we saw in the past (like at Mania 27, for example).

WWE Championship
CM Punk© vs. Chris Jericho

Big Johnny runs into Punk and waives the DQ rule, so if Punk is DQed he loses the title. Not Punk’s best acting job there…

Story here: Jericho came back to challenge for the Best in the World title. For some reason, this turned into a Punk is sober/family isn’t sober angle, which missed what this feud could have been. It did lead to some Punk anger stuff which fits the Big Johnny waiving the DQ rule.

They try to tease some DQ stuff early on with Punk, Jericho slapping him in the face and Punk going nuts, etc.

Jericho asks Punk how his sister is…and Punk gets a chair.

He’s about to nail Jericho in the head with the chair, with Jericho giving Punk his head yelling “your father’s a drunk!” It actually looks pretty awesome.

Jericho suplexes Punk from the apron to the floor, which looked great.

Match surprisingly slows to a crawl. It’s not a bad wrestling match, but it is surprisingly how the crowd really isn’t into it. Unfortunately, I think they were burned out emotionally from Taker vs. HHH, and it’s hard to buy Punk’s anger here.

Excellent Lionsault into the Walls of Jericho, even if bother were countered.

Codebreaker is an awesome move.

Very nice impact on the Lionsault. That’s one of the downfalls of the move as it often looks okay at best, but it looked great here.

Punk goes for the hurricanrana…and Jericho stops it and locks in the Walls of Jericho! Great counter that woke up the crowd!

Punk’s flying clothesline is countered into a Codebreaker! Nice spots!

Punk gets ready for the GTS, and Jericho counters into the Old School Walls of Jericho (which I would consider the Lion Tamer). Coulda bought it as a finish for sure.

Really cool Anaconda Vise sequence where Jericho kept getting pin attempts.

CM Punk retains the title in 22:38. Punk gets Jericho in the center of the ring with the Vise this time. No way out for Jericho and he taps. Despite some odd points towards the beginning, the match owned otherwise. They should have just the straight wrestling match without all the silly anger stuff. Main events are coming through for sure.

We get Brodus Clay. He tells the fans to call their mama’s on their phone. Then Brodus’s “mama and her bridge club” come out and dance to the Funkasauras music. An absolute waste of time. If I were Sheamus or Daniel Bryan I would have quit the company on the spot.

The Rock vs. John Cena

We get some musical performance from MG Kelly and Flo Rida and a whole lot of other people that should have also had Sheamus and Bryan thinking about quitting.

In all seriousness, obviously they’d not quit over this, but they should have been offended over this. Some world title. What a shame since Sheamus and Bryan tore it up next month.

They get booed. And then the real boos come out, here comes John Cena! You would think if WWE wanted him to get at least a 50-50 reaction they wouldn’t dress him up in Boston Celtic green in Miami but what do I know.

Nice strategy from The Rock, making Cena listen to Flo Rida first. No wonder he won.

Here it is. A year of build-up.

All this “both legends in their prime” thing is a little off. No way The Rock in in his prime.

This definitely has a huge match feel for sure.

Cena does get some “Let’s Go Cena” chants.

This is a pretty good back and forth match, with both guys trying to see who’s got what.

Fans are really in this the whole way. First AA Rock kicks out of, of course.

Rock Bottom! Kick out!

This is the kinda thing that bothered me about this match. Cena hits his top rope legdrop when Rock was coming up, a standard move, and he’s shocked it didn’t beat Rock. That doesn’t fit the context of the match.

Rock’s sharpshooter was always a thing of beauty…lol.

Cena’s STF is so terrible.

The People’s Elbow was a good false finish.

Rock actually hits the crossbody off the top, something he hadn’t done since 1997, and Cena rolls though with an AA. Great false finish as Rock kicks out!

The Rock pins John Cena in 33:34. Cena mocks Rock and goes for a People’s Elbow…but Rock gets up and hits the Rock Bottom for three! A lot better of a match than I remember it, pretty good back and forth contest of two wrestlers of their level. The image of Cena sitting on the ramp a loser is pretty strong. This of course set up Cena-Rock II.

Well, this is an interesting show as the main events all delivered and everything else was there. All three main events delivered big time too, especially Taker vs. HHH.

Historically, it didn’t do too much it was meant to do. CM Punk’s reign kept going, Cena got his revenge next year (although was nearly killed by Lesnar on the way), Taker and HHH unended an era? No one really got over any more than they were coming into Wrestlemania.

Except Daniel Bryan.

It’s a huge blunder on this show, the whole Sheamus-Bryan incident. Forget about Bryan for a second, he was getting over at some point no matter what. Sheamus has been ruined for years now. They ran with him through 2012 and he was booed throughout. Fast forward to 2013 when Cena is about to choose his Summerslam opponent and he asks the crowd about Sheamus while fans wanted Bryan. People still haven’t forgotten.

This could have been an A, but it drops to An A- with the Bryan stuff, and down to a B+ as the first hour wasn’t good AND the Brodus Clay and musical acts were just a slap in the face to the World Title.

Final Grade: B+